Facebook is down???

[charack]

So I have been busy the last few days, and finally decide do catch up on all the social drama that is Facebook. When low and behold, the site won't load. What is this! Has society finally collapsed! Are there packs of raving teenagers roaming the streets! Are people being forced to talk to one another in real life?! Are the trolls no more? Have the glampers and scenesters finally been lost in the darkness that is their own imagination? Why At any moment I fear some person I actually know may come knocking on my door!!!

In light of these fearful truths, I have barricaded the doors and windows with socially awkward statements about the constancy of my bowels and an exposition about that one time at band camp.

If you read this, please send send social platitudes and memes as soon as possible!!