....
Nothing really feels worse than being caught in a situation you can't gte out of no matter how much you want to. Last semester I had the idea of taking a class on computer programming thinking it would be interesting. I really didn't need the class, I just took it for fun. Now I am doing very badly in the class no matter how much I study or what I seem to do. Now if I drop the class it shows up that I dropped a class on my transcript and I now have to take a new class next semester to make up for the credits lost for dropping the class. All because I listened to Haley and her convincing story that it's an easy class. Now I hate school and I hate having to take another class next semester. All I wanted was one easy semester since the next one is my last. I guess I can't even get that little thing right. On top of that I'm still jobless, cash is now gone and I have bills to pay. My parents are in bad shape because my dad has such a bad back and all I can do is worry, worry, and worry. Things aren't looking very good at all and I have no idea what o do when I graduate in May, I'll be broke with a degree and nowhere to go. I guess my options in the world are all falling away. As much as I will be hated by my family for thinking about the military I don't know where else to go. I recently had the one great girl in my life tell me we'll never get married so I should stop thinking of something good there. I don't have to give up and quit anything now because there is nothing there to lose anymore. If this is hell then hell hasn't got much because I'm still alive in a world of nothing but bad luck. If anything I should stop caring so damn much about doing what's right and do what it takes to be happy no matter the cost. I don't know anything anymore and I just don't care.