Merry Moviedays!
Two consecutive days, two consecutive reviews! Be still, your beating hearts!
The holidays are a funny time for movies. Many big "blockbuster" events happen during the summer, when folks have more time for going to the movies. Spring and Fall are generally dud seasons, where all the crappy movies come out. But the winter holiday... it's a grab bag. Sometimes you'll find a lump of coal in your cinematic stocking, and other times the film is that surprise gift you never expected, like when your parents actually did buy you that pony. Well, its head, at least. But you know what I mean.
Bad Santa
Christmas movies are notorious for being full of holiday cheer and good will to all men. Bah, humbug, says I. I get my USRDA of holiday cheer walking down the street and passing yuletide decorations. I go to the movies for fun, not cheer. My favorite holiday movies are in fact not heavily laden with cheer as much as they are with... well, something else. Sure, in the end they have the obligatory happy ending where all is resolved in accordance with Christmas spirit, but still, the paths taken by Scrooged and A Christmas Story are unorthodox, at the least. Bad Santa follows in their wake, and catches up quite nicely.
The plot: Con men disguised as Santa and Elf steal shit until some holiday transformative magic kicks in. Warm fuzzy feelings ensue. I got drunk.
The pros: This movie has a smartass midget. It has an alcoholic Santa. It has John Ritter in his last cinematic role ever. It has people being hit in the nuts. It has a hot girl screaming "Fuck me Santa!" in the back seat of a car. Jesus H. Christ, what else do I need to say? Go see this movie! It can do no wrong!
Okay, there's more to it than that. For me, this movie had many laugh-out-loud moments, and that's pretty impressive. It held nothing back. The character interactions were lively, most notably the handful of moments between Bernie Mac and John Ritter. The film as a whole was dark, and rough, and possessed of a small handful of sappy moments that were still touched by the bitterness of Billy Bob Thornton's Fallen Santa. Even the ending is not 100% ideally happy, merely above average for all involved. I think that's a big step for Hollywood's addiction to happy well-resolved endings to every movie ever made (cheesy horror films being the obvious exception). Now hold on- you probably think I'm some manic depressive who hates all things happy and blah blah blah. Not true. I'm a realistic manic depressive who just wants to see the occasional imperfect resolution, reflecting the true nature of man's eternal conflict with the universe, or something like that. Go rent The Killer, a John Woo film starring Chow Yun Fat, and you'll understand the ending I seek.
The cons: The movie started off slowly, and so it took a bit of effort for me to get into the film. There were sappy moments, but I can overlook that for the greater good. And they were needed for it to fill its niche as a "holiday film" in which someone learns the True Meaning Of Christmas, rah bah bah, we've only seen this half a billion times before. Anyway, moving on. Supposedly Bill Murray was the first choice for the lead character; I'm curious as to whether he would actually have been better than Billy Bob Thornton. I'm not so sure, and I think Murray is funny as all hell. This is not a kids' film- it covers such topics as heavy drinking, assfucking, suicide, and domestic abuse. So to whoever brought their child into the theater I was watching the movie in, WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING, YOU STUPID FUCK? Jesus... I was ready to go all Lo Pan on him and his screaming hellspawn. But that's irrelevant.
The verdict: Uproariously funny, if your sense of humor is as dark as mine is. If you're pure as the driven snow, go see Elf instead. You pansy.
Disclaimer: You shouldn't say "midget". It's demeaning. So are the temrs "dwarf", "little person", "shrimp", "half-pint", and "mini-me". It's much more proper to ignore titles and lead in with witty commentary, like "Dude, who left you a few cycles too long in the tumble dry?" Or "Let me guess, there's four more of you, and together you form Moletron, Defender of the Punyverse!"
The holidays are a funny time for movies. Many big "blockbuster" events happen during the summer, when folks have more time for going to the movies. Spring and Fall are generally dud seasons, where all the crappy movies come out. But the winter holiday... it's a grab bag. Sometimes you'll find a lump of coal in your cinematic stocking, and other times the film is that surprise gift you never expected, like when your parents actually did buy you that pony. Well, its head, at least. But you know what I mean.
Bad Santa
Christmas movies are notorious for being full of holiday cheer and good will to all men. Bah, humbug, says I. I get my USRDA of holiday cheer walking down the street and passing yuletide decorations. I go to the movies for fun, not cheer. My favorite holiday movies are in fact not heavily laden with cheer as much as they are with... well, something else. Sure, in the end they have the obligatory happy ending where all is resolved in accordance with Christmas spirit, but still, the paths taken by Scrooged and A Christmas Story are unorthodox, at the least. Bad Santa follows in their wake, and catches up quite nicely.
The plot: Con men disguised as Santa and Elf steal shit until some holiday transformative magic kicks in. Warm fuzzy feelings ensue. I got drunk.
The pros: This movie has a smartass midget. It has an alcoholic Santa. It has John Ritter in his last cinematic role ever. It has people being hit in the nuts. It has a hot girl screaming "Fuck me Santa!" in the back seat of a car. Jesus H. Christ, what else do I need to say? Go see this movie! It can do no wrong!
Okay, there's more to it than that. For me, this movie had many laugh-out-loud moments, and that's pretty impressive. It held nothing back. The character interactions were lively, most notably the handful of moments between Bernie Mac and John Ritter. The film as a whole was dark, and rough, and possessed of a small handful of sappy moments that were still touched by the bitterness of Billy Bob Thornton's Fallen Santa. Even the ending is not 100% ideally happy, merely above average for all involved. I think that's a big step for Hollywood's addiction to happy well-resolved endings to every movie ever made (cheesy horror films being the obvious exception). Now hold on- you probably think I'm some manic depressive who hates all things happy and blah blah blah. Not true. I'm a realistic manic depressive who just wants to see the occasional imperfect resolution, reflecting the true nature of man's eternal conflict with the universe, or something like that. Go rent The Killer, a John Woo film starring Chow Yun Fat, and you'll understand the ending I seek.
The cons: The movie started off slowly, and so it took a bit of effort for me to get into the film. There were sappy moments, but I can overlook that for the greater good. And they were needed for it to fill its niche as a "holiday film" in which someone learns the True Meaning Of Christmas, rah bah bah, we've only seen this half a billion times before. Anyway, moving on. Supposedly Bill Murray was the first choice for the lead character; I'm curious as to whether he would actually have been better than Billy Bob Thornton. I'm not so sure, and I think Murray is funny as all hell. This is not a kids' film- it covers such topics as heavy drinking, assfucking, suicide, and domestic abuse. So to whoever brought their child into the theater I was watching the movie in, WHAT THE FUCK WERE YOU THINKING, YOU STUPID FUCK? Jesus... I was ready to go all Lo Pan on him and his screaming hellspawn. But that's irrelevant.
The verdict: Uproariously funny, if your sense of humor is as dark as mine is. If you're pure as the driven snow, go see Elf instead. You pansy.
Disclaimer: You shouldn't say "midget". It's demeaning. So are the temrs "dwarf", "little person", "shrimp", "half-pint", and "mini-me". It's much more proper to ignore titles and lead in with witty commentary, like "Dude, who left you a few cycles too long in the tumble dry?" Or "Let me guess, there's four more of you, and together you form Moletron, Defender of the Punyverse!"