(no subject)
Gyah, this has been a crazy last month or so. Where should i begin? Hrmmm...
Well, let's start with the first thing: I got a job. It's a shit job working in the deli at Publix, but it pays the bills. I can now make a killer philly cheesesteak, and I know how to artistically arrange salads so they're pretty as well as tasty. The experience of working in a job like this one is so unlike anything I've ever done before. I've met a lot of different people that I'd never meet working retail sales. People from all walks of life, immigrants to young mothers to aspiring musicians trying to save money. It's really refreshing, there's not as much pretention as I've seen in a lot of other jobs I've worked. It's hard work, a lot of menial labor, and kind of a thankless job. But it's rewarding knowing I'm learning self reliance.
Speaking of self reliance, i've moved out finally. Steve bought a house, and I'm renting a room there. It's nice having my own space. Already, the terrible tension between my family and I is dwindling. the rift brought on by the last 3 years is beginning to mend. There's still a lot of work to be done, but having my own space where I'm not reporting in to anyone else is really really nice.
I've had kind of a beginning-of-life crisis though- I'm finally feeling like an adult. After I graduated, I kind of hung around for a year and a half not really doing anything. I took a couple of classes, had a part time job here and there, but never really made a committment to anything. That part of me is changed. I've grown bored with the mediocrithy of my life, and I got sick of feeling like I wasn't really in control of my destiny. It took me a while, but I'm finally seeing what being a grown up is all about: Facing responsibility, and that my own personal freedom has a price tag. It's motivating me towards what I really want to do- save up enough money to attend Catawba in the spring. Hopefully by then I'll feel like I'm actually willing and able to buckle down and do things like study. I'm my own motivator, if I want to do something with my life, I have to take steps to make that happen.
Growning up sucks, but it's time.
Well, let's start with the first thing: I got a job. It's a shit job working in the deli at Publix, but it pays the bills. I can now make a killer philly cheesesteak, and I know how to artistically arrange salads so they're pretty as well as tasty. The experience of working in a job like this one is so unlike anything I've ever done before. I've met a lot of different people that I'd never meet working retail sales. People from all walks of life, immigrants to young mothers to aspiring musicians trying to save money. It's really refreshing, there's not as much pretention as I've seen in a lot of other jobs I've worked. It's hard work, a lot of menial labor, and kind of a thankless job. But it's rewarding knowing I'm learning self reliance.
Speaking of self reliance, i've moved out finally. Steve bought a house, and I'm renting a room there. It's nice having my own space. Already, the terrible tension between my family and I is dwindling. the rift brought on by the last 3 years is beginning to mend. There's still a lot of work to be done, but having my own space where I'm not reporting in to anyone else is really really nice.
I've had kind of a beginning-of-life crisis though- I'm finally feeling like an adult. After I graduated, I kind of hung around for a year and a half not really doing anything. I took a couple of classes, had a part time job here and there, but never really made a committment to anything. That part of me is changed. I've grown bored with the mediocrithy of my life, and I got sick of feeling like I wasn't really in control of my destiny. It took me a while, but I'm finally seeing what being a grown up is all about: Facing responsibility, and that my own personal freedom has a price tag. It's motivating me towards what I really want to do- save up enough money to attend Catawba in the spring. Hopefully by then I'll feel like I'm actually willing and able to buckle down and do things like study. I'm my own motivator, if I want to do something with my life, I have to take steps to make that happen.
Growning up sucks, but it's time.