"Don't hold anyone on your knee, you'd better be true to me..."
Saturday (contd)
(f) Afternoon Craftiness
We got back just in time to start the afternoon’s activity (creating costumes and scenery for skits), which I SKIVED ENTIRELY due to nervous exhaustion from organising stuff (I am not a natural organiser (as if people hadn’t noticed)). Helen and I went upstairs and ate petits filous whilst spying on people from the window overlooking the hall, which was highly entertaining. Rosie joined us briefly on her voyage to scavenge foliage. There was much giggling. Helen and I, both being THE WORLD’S HUGEST DRAMA QUEENS, should in fact repel each other utterly, but it seems to work OK. After that, we wandered around a bit, and eventually made our way to the Gentian dormitory where Katie was having a little sleepy, and we lay around and watched Bones and were generally idle and snoozy until dinner time beckoned.
(g) Evening Larking
Dinner was to be interleaved the plays (dinner theatre, alive and well in Milton Keynes). Tables were arranged in a suitable fashion and we bagsied one IN AN INCREDIBLY EMBARRASSING DISPLAY OF THIRTEEN YEAR OLD BEHAVIOUR for which I am suitably shamed.
{i} Why did old girls stop sending their daughters to the CS?
Dominatrices at the Chalet School: whips, neon pink net and Pim prancing around with a multi-purpose red beard. It were beautiful.
{ii} Lady Acetylene Lampe
Home to the best scenery ever, which we STOLE and are planning to put up behind the front door at FT. Seriously, it’s gorgeous. Plus, Heather’s St Bernard got a work-out…
{iii} The torrid affair of Miss Annersley and Commander Christie…
This was a tiny bit hilarious (as indicated by the fact they won). Katherine (in a Naval uniform and beard) and Rosie (in the ubiquitous mortar board) whispered sweet nothings in a comedy restaurant, with some inspired silent film-esque narration. How we all laughed, though I’m not aware of anyone weeping gently or sliding off their chair.
{iv} What did Captain Carrick do to make India too hot for him?
Kill Reepicheep, apparently. Puppets and Beth being genius on the organ. It was fabulous, and produced Captain Carrick.
(h) Captain Carrick, and Other Unauthorised Evening Larkings
The most important thing to understand about the rest of the evening is that Kathryn had brought along a bottle of vodka, which our table proceeded to drink in its entirety during the course of the evening. We played Katherine’s Eustacia game (beautifully crafted but slightly confusing once we’d had alcohol) and then moved on to some more impertinent questions (my hair featured heavily, as is only right and proper, as did Helen’s and my respective rights to be considered the queens of drama, not to mention the likelihood of Katherine and Helen having some kind of sapphic cupboard experience, given Helen’s propensity for walking in on naked people), then Captain Carrick joined our merry throng and, being the black sheep that he is, proceeded to wreak havoc in our hearts. We had a bit of tongue action because he loves me best. Helen (WHO IS NOT IN ANYWAY A QUALIFIED COLORECTAL SURGEON) chopped off his bottom and we then abused him as a wine… well a wine-hider, basically.
(i) Helen’s near-death experience
Then Helen CHOKED NIGH UNTO DEATH on water or vodka or life or something, so that was quite funny.
Helen: I am choking nigh unto death on water or vodka or life or something.
Everyone: [ignores]
Helen: [chokes]
Me: Um.
Helen: [chokes]
Me: Are you OK?
Helen: [chokes]
Helen: [flees]
Everyone: [ignores]
Me: [is worried]
Me: Did the satnav choke?
(j) The rest of the evening
We drank more wine and chatted and then Helen and I (being geniuses) made a beautiful sign for Katie that said “Nobody puts The Katie in the corner…” which is funny BECAUSE IT’S A LIE. Kathryn dried it with her hairdryer, and we pinned it up IN HER CORNER. (That was irony.) Probably more stuff happened. We all wound up in Gentian and chatted more and then I very much suspect I fell asleep. This is the end of Saturday.
Still got Sunday to go, but the end is in sight…
(f) Afternoon Craftiness
We got back just in time to start the afternoon’s activity (creating costumes and scenery for skits), which I SKIVED ENTIRELY due to nervous exhaustion from organising stuff (I am not a natural organiser (as if people hadn’t noticed)). Helen and I went upstairs and ate petits filous whilst spying on people from the window overlooking the hall, which was highly entertaining. Rosie joined us briefly on her voyage to scavenge foliage. There was much giggling. Helen and I, both being THE WORLD’S HUGEST DRAMA QUEENS, should in fact repel each other utterly, but it seems to work OK. After that, we wandered around a bit, and eventually made our way to the Gentian dormitory where Katie was having a little sleepy, and we lay around and watched Bones and were generally idle and snoozy until dinner time beckoned.
(g) Evening Larking
Dinner was to be interleaved the plays (dinner theatre, alive and well in Milton Keynes). Tables were arranged in a suitable fashion and we bagsied one IN AN INCREDIBLY EMBARRASSING DISPLAY OF THIRTEEN YEAR OLD BEHAVIOUR for which I am suitably shamed.
{i} Why did old girls stop sending their daughters to the CS?
Dominatrices at the Chalet School: whips, neon pink net and Pim prancing around with a multi-purpose red beard. It were beautiful.
{ii} Lady Acetylene Lampe
Home to the best scenery ever, which we STOLE and are planning to put up behind the front door at FT. Seriously, it’s gorgeous. Plus, Heather’s St Bernard got a work-out…
{iii} The torrid affair of Miss Annersley and Commander Christie…
This was a tiny bit hilarious (as indicated by the fact they won). Katherine (in a Naval uniform and beard) and Rosie (in the ubiquitous mortar board) whispered sweet nothings in a comedy restaurant, with some inspired silent film-esque narration. How we all laughed, though I’m not aware of anyone weeping gently or sliding off their chair.
{iv} What did Captain Carrick do to make India too hot for him?
Kill Reepicheep, apparently. Puppets and Beth being genius on the organ. It was fabulous, and produced Captain Carrick.
(h) Captain Carrick, and Other Unauthorised Evening Larkings
The most important thing to understand about the rest of the evening is that Kathryn had brought along a bottle of vodka, which our table proceeded to drink in its entirety during the course of the evening. We played Katherine’s Eustacia game (beautifully crafted but slightly confusing once we’d had alcohol) and then moved on to some more impertinent questions (my hair featured heavily, as is only right and proper, as did Helen’s and my respective rights to be considered the queens of drama, not to mention the likelihood of Katherine and Helen having some kind of sapphic cupboard experience, given Helen’s propensity for walking in on naked people), then Captain Carrick joined our merry throng and, being the black sheep that he is, proceeded to wreak havoc in our hearts. We had a bit of tongue action because he loves me best. Helen (WHO IS NOT IN ANYWAY A QUALIFIED COLORECTAL SURGEON) chopped off his bottom and we then abused him as a wine… well a wine-hider, basically.
(i) Helen’s near-death experience
Then Helen CHOKED NIGH UNTO DEATH on water or vodka or life or something, so that was quite funny.
Helen: I am choking nigh unto death on water or vodka or life or something.
Everyone: [ignores]
Helen: [chokes]
Me: Um.
Helen: [chokes]
Me: Are you OK?
Helen: [chokes]
Helen: [flees]
Everyone: [ignores]
Me: [is worried]
Me: Did the satnav choke?
(j) The rest of the evening
We drank more wine and chatted and then Helen and I (being geniuses) made a beautiful sign for Katie that said “Nobody puts The Katie in the corner…” which is funny BECAUSE IT’S A LIE. Kathryn dried it with her hairdryer, and we pinned it up IN HER CORNER. (That was irony.) Probably more stuff happened. We all wound up in Gentian and chatted more and then I very much suspect I fell asleep. This is the end of Saturday.
Still got Sunday to go, but the end is in sight…