...ok...it official..
I have officially been told something that really hurts... i can and have put up with ALOT of shit im my life.. and i will prolly continue to do so... however.. there is ONE thing in my life that i have done damn near more than ANY other person or group of ppl taht i have met.. and that is Care. I have been told that i don't care.... !!!NEWSFLASH!!! i do care.. about many ppl.. one in particular has my care and love, moreso than everybody else combined... and now i have been told by her.. that there is no chance of us getting back together....prolly ever.. and that shes takeing a friends advice...(one of MY friends advice) and moving on with her life... personally.. im confused as all hell... cos i thought we had come to the conclusion that we had to work on some things before we could get back together.. and if we didn't get back together..we would try friendship... but i guess thats not happening any time soon... and now i have to deal with an issue myself that i wasn't prepared to deal with..... i found the person who i believe had something to do with my loss of memory for a few hours one night at a club....dealing with it myself is not going o be fun...but owell.. i guess it happens.. i don't think i'll be in ANY sort of relationship for a long...LONG... time... i have found out that they hurt way to bad.. and i don't ever want this kind of pain again... from anybody...ever. So i'll try and be me.. but not the relationship need to have a kid me....im trying to cut that out of my life.... it has caused me more pain than i care to recognize... newho.. im going to go for a walk to clear my head and try and meditate today...