(Untitled)

[ch1m3r4]

I have a simple honest question. Why do women like assholes?
I don't understand it at all.
Maybe if I were an asshole I wouldn't have the problems I do.
Ehhh.. I don't think I could live with my self like that.
Ohh well..
I guess i'm shit out of luck then.

Comments

[tristjessa]

You know, I've dated assholes in the past... and as far as I can tell, guys are nice to you just up to the point where you fall in love with them (or until you start having sex with them, in some cases). And then they become assholes. But you really can't do anything about it, because you insist on telling yourself that you love him, and that he's just having a bad day, and he'll be back to his normal self soon enough... but then those bad days stretch into weeks and months... and you just can't tear yourself away from the guy even though deep down you know you should, because he doesn't treat you well.

I'm speaking from my own personal experiences though. =/

[tristjessa]

I left my post anonymous because you don't know me and I just stumbled across your journal, so posting my name would be useless. In addition to my first comment, I agree with tristjessa. Many guys who start out nice later start being assholes, but by then it's too late. In reponse to the person who said that it had to do with the father- obviously many relationships are related to how our parents treat us. However, the case you are mentioning is not so broad as to explain the "phenomenon" cited in the original post. If this guy thinks that almost all or all girls are attracted to assholes, your explanation doesn't work at all. Oh yeah, and I majored in psych, so I'm not ignorant of these theories. My original explanation was also writted while I was drunk. However, I think it still explains most cases- minus those where the guy starts off as nice.

[tristjessa]

*also written (not "writted")

[jehiva]

Then post your name fuckwad.

[tristjessa]

Wow, so much hostility.

[jehiva]

Otherwise you have 0 credentials backing up your claim of being a psych major, and my point was in reference to the broad scale. How many girls do you know of that had a wonderful loving family upbringing and remain with assholes? A very small percent, and those that do, do so for the reasons jessa posted.

[tristjessa]

What kind of raging idiot lies about being a psych major? Oh, I forgot, most people are idiots, so I could see how you might imagine that I am. Anyway- being attracted to, and staying with assholes are two different things. I think that women who are originally attracted to guys that are "assholes" are normally basing their attraction on things like looks, not personality. Hence the explanation about cute guys. I think it is very rare that a girl goes "oh look! an asshole! I am so attracted to him!" and yes, in some cases, I agree with you about underlying psychological issues. But I assume that you wouldn't be wondering so much about an issue if you were only talking about a small percentage of women that had a bad family life. Also, my response to this is fueled by knowing many "nice guys" that are not extremely attractive that always whine about how girls go for "assholes" while failing to take into account the physical appeal (or monetary appeal, or ability to be "charming") of said assholes. In any case, I don't think that it is

[ch1m3r4]

It's not a matter of a woman going "oh look! an asshole! I am so attracted to him!" The matter of attraction is they like to be treated poorly. Maybe not like it per se. They have some sort of need for it. As I stated before, this isn't about all women. It's about those women who are attracted to that type of person.
Those who allow themselves to be treated poorly and do nothing about it. This isn't about a women who randomly dates a guy who appears to be nice or charming and turns out to be an asshole.

[jehiva]

Just to point out the obvious, I'd say the father influence is a greater deciding factor in these caseS (plural), not one isolated case, then the statement saying it's because all guys who are cute are assholes, or all assholes are cute?

I know plenty of asshole guys who are in no way cute/attractive, and then some that are cute and not assholes, such as Grant and myself.

Kthx, bye noob

[ch1m3r4]

Thanks Matt.

[ch1m3r4]

Actually, the question was "Why do women like assholes?" No where in there did I state all or even the majority of girls. It was a generalized question about the women who do like assholes. And since it's broad enough to cover those girls who are attracted to assholes as well as those that stay with them after they show you who they really are. I think Matt's explanation of why covered it quite well. Your explanation on the other hand is actually quite flawed stating without fact that for one "most guys are assholes" I would like to see the research that proves that. As well as the research that proves that "cute guys are 99% more likely to be assholes." That's just silly. It's a personal bias. With nothing to back it up other than your own experiences. And unless you've been with a large portion of the male population. I don't believe your own personal experiences are quite proof enough to back anything up

[ch1m3r4]

Umm.. yeah.. "Their" not "they're"

[glitternympho]

This is to answer the question that begs-- why stay with them if they show they're "true colors