For My Jamie
Jamie: she's beautiful. I can't imagine a more beautiful person to me than her. Her looks; she's got beautiful blue eyes, so icy that I get lost within their depths. Her personality; I never want to let it go. Or her. Which is why I'm not going to. When I met her, it was like two she-wolves circling around each other just snarling, getting the smell of each other, sizing each other up, nothing too friendly. By the end of that day, we were friends, and it only grew in leaps and bounds from there. I can't believe the wonderful, beautiful friend she is. I've never felt more like a female than when I'm with her, which is a great thing! This weekend, a lot of things came out that have needed to for a long time, such as the fact that she feels as if she is losing me. I cannot tell you how much this hurt, how many pieces my heart seemed to fall into once she said that. Granted, she was kinda...uhh...smashed, but I knew it came from her bleeding heart. I guess the only reason I am writing this now is to tell her, somehow, that she is most definately the most important person in the world to me, and never, ever, under any circumstances will she lose me. I am always here, never going anywhere. I cannot lose my one and only sister. I want to be a girly girl, if it means it will make her smile! I want to do my hair and play with my makeup and paint my nails and have sleep overs and goddammit I'll replace everything in my wardrobe with pink if it will show her I'm serious when I say that I'm not ever leaving her; I'm not going anywhere, things are only going to change minimally. Yes, Ross and I are together now, and for that I will be forever grateful. But honestly, that doesn't change much in my book. Yes, it happened with Cliff and I. Yes, it happened with Shithead and I. But no, you're not getting rid of me, I'm here to stay, babe, and I love more than you'll ever know. I'll never leave you.