(no subject)
Anyone who reads this already knows the housing situation, so I don't feel like going into that. I will say that it's rather hard to pack up the small amount of shit I have in under 24 hours...that was probably the biggest pain in my ass ever. I can't convey the feelings that ran through me during that 24-hour period, because they are deeply heart breaking, and I don't think I could truly do them justice with any man's(or woman's) vocabulary. It has taken me over a week to actually write about this, and it not because I'm busy, or lazy, it's just that I couldn't really get over the hump that was plopped down in front of me in a timely fashion. I have lived back with the elders for ten days now...I hate it here. I long for the days of freedom I was awarded while living by myself, and I take great pride in knowing that it fell apart through no fault of my own. I feel so embarrassed to tell anyone that I had to tuck my tail, and come "home" due to how much of a loser it makes me feel like to live at "home" again.
I said goodbye to my real home on April 3rd, 2008.
May 30th, 2007 was the first night I slept in it, I remember everything about that basement room so perfectly. I remember coming home from school on that first day, and I could not stop smiling, it was one of the happiest moments of my life. God knows I could sit here all night writing about everything that happened in that house, good and bad, but I'd like to think all those moments will live on in not only me, but in the people I shared them with.
Derek,Bob,Myk,Gucwa,Tiera,Lauren,Crittle,Protege,Skyler,Amanda,Heather,Chris,Brittany, even the parents shared these moments with me, and I hope they meant as much to them as they did to me.
It makes me think about the impending doom that I will face. Derek is moving to Massachusetts at the end of the month, meaning that my best friend, who I have spent the last 16 years hanging with, is going to be leaving. I don't know what to say to show how scared I am.
Bob is moving to Mass also, leaving this town behind for good(we can only hope) I wish that I had spent more time with Bob in the past, but I think he has advanced much further on his path to an adult life, meaning coming to terms with the separation that was bound to occur between siblings. It might have been between just Bob and myself though.
so both of my brothers are Mass-bound, and I am so scared to lose them to the monster that is "out of sight, out of mind"
I honestly was still adapting to the girls being gone(Kristina moved out in 2004, Crittle in 2006) until we started talking about getting an apartment together in Manchester, I am excited about this, and hope it happens, I miss them quite badly.
I miss my home, but I know I have to make a new one, and I know I can make great memories in that one also.
I said goodbye to my real home on April 3rd, 2008.
May 30th, 2007 was the first night I slept in it, I remember everything about that basement room so perfectly. I remember coming home from school on that first day, and I could not stop smiling, it was one of the happiest moments of my life. God knows I could sit here all night writing about everything that happened in that house, good and bad, but I'd like to think all those moments will live on in not only me, but in the people I shared them with.
Derek,Bob,Myk,Gucwa,Tiera,Lauren,Crittle,Protege,Skyler,Amanda,Heather,Chris,Brittany, even the parents shared these moments with me, and I hope they meant as much to them as they did to me.
It makes me think about the impending doom that I will face. Derek is moving to Massachusetts at the end of the month, meaning that my best friend, who I have spent the last 16 years hanging with, is going to be leaving. I don't know what to say to show how scared I am.
Bob is moving to Mass also, leaving this town behind for good(we can only hope) I wish that I had spent more time with Bob in the past, but I think he has advanced much further on his path to an adult life, meaning coming to terms with the separation that was bound to occur between siblings. It might have been between just Bob and myself though.
so both of my brothers are Mass-bound, and I am so scared to lose them to the monster that is "out of sight, out of mind"
I honestly was still adapting to the girls being gone(Kristina moved out in 2004, Crittle in 2006) until we started talking about getting an apartment together in Manchester, I am excited about this, and hope it happens, I miss them quite badly.
I miss my home, but I know I have to make a new one, and I know I can make great memories in that one also.