I assume that most couples in this situation have the best of intentions and don't realize how challenging it is to raise a kid in a house with two religions. And for most couples, one person is more strongly committed religiously than the other is; after all, if you have, say, a very-strongly-committed Catholic and a very-strongly-committed Jew, what are the odds that they would actually have married each other? Interfaith marriage results when religion is negotiable, and thinking abstractly about future kids can be rather different from confronting the issues around actual kids.
(Years ago, when I was not religious, I wondered just what the big deal was about interfaith marriages. I mean, each person can worship as he likes and not harm the other, right? Now I understand -- and it's not just about the kids, either. As I was studying for conversion I realized that I absolutely could not marry a non-Jew -- even if I ended up with a non-religious Jew, there needed to be at least that level of common understanding. It's hard to explain and it sounds snooty when I try, but it's not being snooty. In my case, I realized it would be a slap in the face of my adopted people to join them and then marry out.)
I don't know what happens if a Jew and a Catholic marry because both groups make you promise to raise the children according to their faith.
Well, that's the case if clergy officiate. No one can stop the couple from going to the JP. Or, for that matter, a rabbi can't stop the Jewish partner if the couple decides to get married in the church, or vice-versa.
Most rabbis won't participate in interfaith weddings; I assume the same is true for most priests. Some will, and some do "joint" weddings where they have clergy of both faiths involved, but I don't know how the negotiations for that tend to work out.
Most rabbis won't participate in interfaith weddings; I assume the same is true for most priests.
Catholic priests will perform a service for someone who is marrying a non-Catholic, but the couple is usually required to participate in the Catholic pre-marriage preparation class/counseling
Also, if the couple would prefer for the ceremony to be performed by a minister of the non-Catholic fiance(e)'s faith, the marriage can still be seen as 'ok' in the eyes of the Catholic church as long as the couple goes through the hoops of asking for permission and, again, attends the Catholic premarriage preparation class/counseling
one thing that is important in that pre-marriage prep stuff is having conversations about "ok, say you have kids.... what are you going to teach them about religion? search your heart, what are you really feeling about this"
and as for your comment that you realized you couldn't marry a non-Jew.... I've dated non-Catholic guys and my most recent boyfriend and my current one were raised Catholic.... it's.... amazing the difference. Yes, it can be very tiring to have something that is important to you seem like it comes from Mars to someone who is very important to you
(Years ago, when I was not religious, I wondered just what the big deal was about interfaith marriages. I mean, each person can worship as he likes and not harm the other, right? Now I understand -- and it's not just about the kids, either. As I was studying for conversion I realized that I absolutely could not marry a non-Jew -- even if I ended up with a non-religious Jew, there needed to be at least that level of common understanding. It's hard to explain and it sounds snooty when I try, but it's not being snooty. In my case, I realized it would be a slap in the face of my adopted people to join them and then marry out.)
I don't know what happens if a Jew and a Catholic marry because both groups make you promise to raise the children according to their faith.
Well, that's the case if clergy officiate. No one can stop the couple from going to the JP. Or, for that matter, a rabbi can't stop the Jewish partner if the couple decides to get married in the church, or vice-versa.
Most rabbis won't participate in interfaith weddings; I assume the same is true for most priests. Some will, and some do "joint" weddings where they have clergy of both faiths involved, but I don't know how the negotiations for that tend to work out.
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Catholic priests will perform a service for someone who is marrying a non-Catholic, but the couple is usually required to participate in the Catholic pre-marriage preparation class/counseling
Also, if the couple would prefer for the ceremony to be performed by a minister of the non-Catholic fiance(e)'s faith, the marriage can still be seen as 'ok' in the eyes of the Catholic church as long as the couple goes through the hoops of asking for permission and, again, attends the Catholic premarriage preparation class/counseling
one thing that is important in that pre-marriage prep stuff is having conversations about "ok, say you have kids.... what are you going to teach them about religion? search your heart, what are you really feeling about this"
and as for your comment that you realized you couldn't marry a non-Jew.... I've dated non-Catholic guys and my most recent boyfriend and my current one were raised Catholic.... it's.... amazing the difference. Yes, it can be very tiring to have something that is important to you seem like it comes from Mars to someone who is very important to you
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