this sucks
i won't say i hate you...hate is too strong of a word.
but i really REALLY dislike you.
i hate how i have great opportunities.
yet i don't jump on them because i am afraid of what that'll mean to you.
i hate how i feel like im weak whenever i call.
yet ill call for even some of the most stupid reasons.
i hate how i want nothing to do with you.
yet i look at your pictures wishing i could be even a small part of your life.
then hate when i realize tears are rolling off my cheeks as i see that in no way am i any part of your life.
i hate how you say you need to have this time to figure things out for yourself.
yet i see you with all these other girls...especially the one i am most insecure to.
i hate how you say "talk to you soon" or "ill see you soon".
its just a line you feed to make me feel better.
newsflash: it only makes me feel worse knowing that i wont talk to you OR see you soon.
and why? because you can't pick up a phone or take a drive to see how the heck i am.
more than anything though, i hate that you can still say you love me...even to other people,
though we both know that if that was the truth you wouldn't be able to stay away from me for this long.
you're missing out. and you'll see it when its too late.