and the life of him began at midnight
hm...my weekend was alright. it wasn't fantastic but you know, my weekends haven't been like that in a while.
well, i kind of miss stephen. i don't know if that's normal. i've been kind of a bitch to him but that's because if i just take the time to be nice, he takes it the wrong way and then he starts telling me he loves me and all that. i don't want him to do that. i don't want him to do that...but i know i can't properly be his friend without any of his emotions getting the best of him.
i've been hanging out with vikram a lot lately. we've been smoking a lot and just going out to eat. i like his schedule because he has to go home when i have to go home. ha, it's good stuff.
i got pretty messed up on saturday with jorge. the only problem was, i was the only one that got messed up. i remember seeing jamie but i was too messed up to have any fun with him.
so it seems like all my damn friends are moving away. i shouldn't complain because they're all moving for the better. i should just wish them good luck but i'm just too selfish to feel happy because i never want them to move. jamie is finally going to join his twin and move to san marcos...i don't think he can stand to be away from victor. at least they'll have their own apartment.
me on the other hand...i'm good where i am. maybe i won't be anymore because my friends are all going...but my family's still here and i like hanging out with them too.
i'm about to lose all the free time i have on the weekdays because i'm going to start going to school mondays through thursdays at night. not cool. i should drop something, but i really need to get all my classes done.
i feel...i don't know. i feel kind of lost. i miss stephen. i don't know what the hell is wrong with me...but i just miss lying with him and talking to him...normally. he's the most affectionate boyfriend i've ever had...and i don't know what the fuck just happened one day. it was the fuckin' pills.
pfizer just needs to calm down with the distribution of pills. i think pills are being consumed a lot more illegally than legally.
i mean, seriously, how many people do you know that's so fucked up that they have to be barred out to be normal? i mean...i know of people like that...but the xanax that they take are really low dosage. not enough to mess anybody up.
i think that stephen would be a better person if he wasn't known to be a pill head.
i don't need anybody, though. i just need to get myself together...that's it.