What I do with my time in the 20 minutes a day I'm not working
Where were they? Sam thought he remembered a sign somewhere a while back that said Aurora, or Joliet, but all of Illinois looked the same. ...And Justice for All was giving him a headache. He turned off the music and looked out at the bare trees and snow-covered grass along the side of the highway.
"Whatcha thinking?" asked Dean.
"Christmas presents."
"You could detail the car."
"Not for you."
"Do you have someone else you’re buying presents for?"
"Sometimes I think about Jess, and how every year in August I’d start freaking out about what to get her for Christmas. Girls are weird about getting jewelry because they think it means you want to marry them, but I couldn’t just get her a t-shirt or something."
"Ah, Sammy, you must not have learned about the best present ever to give a girl."
"What’s that?"
Dean looked over his shoulder and shifted the Impala into the left lane. "First thing you do is get a box. And not a little one. Well, in your case a little one would probably be fine, like one of those boxes girls keep their earrings in. Then you cover the box with wrapping paper and cut a hole in the side. You probably wouldn’t need to make the hole much more than an inch across. I have to cut one that’s a little bigger. Then you put your junk through the hole and put the lid back on the box and--"
"You what?"
"Then she opens the box and--"
Sam got the picture and his jaw dropped. "Dean, that’s disgusting! Just...no. You...why would you do that to a girl you liked?"
"Aw, c’mon, she’ll get a laugh out of it. And it avoids you having to deal with Christmas crowds at the mall. It’s the perfect gift, dude."
"Just please tell me you never tried that trick on a date at the movies with a box of popcorn."
Dean shrugged, looked at Sam and asked, "So, you hungry?"