Captain's Log
Remember that time I went to Indiana and kept a paper journal just so I could update my Online journal?
Yeah, uhh neither...do I...
Anyway, this will be Day 2 of I HAVE NOTHING TO DO AT WORK EXTRAVAGANZA
All long-term projects are complete, all cailin-generated (god help us all) training sessions are complete documented and ready to fire, and none of the hardware is smoking or sparking (more than usual) so I am left here to do nothing more than get into some serious shenanigans.
Allow me to briefly recap the events of Friday:
Jalapeno Jellybeans
Okay folks, seriously?! NOBODY told me?! It's like you all knew all this time, and it was some big spicy conspiracy to keep me out of the loop. "DID YOU KNOW THEY MAKE A JALAPENO JELLY BEAN?!" "uhh, yeah." Sure, just suck the excitement right out, and jab the straw into my eye socket.
...well, anyway, I discovered that Jelly Belly produces a line of Jalapeno Jellybeans, too hardcore to include in the standard mix, although they count the flavor as one of the 'original 50.' Note: the Original 50 mix (I'm sure there's a different/official name for it, but I don't give a care) only actually includes 49 flavors. Apparently the jalapeno bean is so badass that it wants to make all the rest of the beans taste like it does. I don't know how I feel about this, while part of me is like JALAPENO, FUCK YEAH! 'cause that's just awesome, I was disappointed to discover that I wouldn't be able to taste the jalapeno jelly bean without purchasing an individual-flavor pack. What if I (unbelieveably) don't like it? Then I'm stuck with a bag of nasty jelly confections. On the flip side of that though, if i don't wind up loving the shit out of them, I could always offer them up as Watermelon jelly beans just to watch peoples' faces...
A spectacular idea!
15 minutes and 9 dollars later...
Marvels of Modern Confectionary
The discovery of the jalapeno jelly bean and the discussions I had as a result led me to the 'discovery' (okay so someone told me about it) of other confection-marvels: Wasabi/Ginger & Maple/Bacon lollipops! Nothing more to say aside from pointing out my amazement. AMAZEMENT. And excitement. EXCITEMENT. I only hope that these lollipops turn out better than the horrible Combos experiments (RE: Bacon/egg/cheese-flavored Combos - sorry, never a good idea to make anything taste like a bacon egg and cheese sammich, except, of course, a bacon, egg and cheese sammich). MISSION!
General Advice
If you ever send an advertisement from a self-proclaimed homosexual periodical from a fake individual at a fake address (note: the name and/or address could in fact be real), DO NOT FORGET ABOUT THIS. Especially if it is more than one advertisement in multiple mailings to an Admissions Representative during the "busy season!" I cannot stress this enough! When you do forget about it, you never get closure! You'll find yourself asking...yourself questions like "What did he do with the ads?" "What did he say" and most importantly "WHAT WAS THE EXPRESSION ON HIS FACE?" as he must have come to the realization that the next 10 envelopes contain more! Now I find myself wondering, just wondering. I'll never know, and I can never ask. I'll just have to dig up another one of those magazines - which, might I add, ECTI somehow became subscribed to and although right up my alley, I honestly had nothing to do with it (DIVINE INTERVENTION MUCH?) - cut out some more advertisements and perhaps articles this time, and send them again. So, in conclusion, if you ever plan to partake in such an activity, be sure to keep your eyes peeled for the arrival of your little morsels in the mail or you'll be left with your dick hanging out, pretty much forever.
Science Project Friday
After receiving a video attachment from an email from my good ol' Uncle Gerry, I have made every Friday at ECTI OFFICIALLY Science Project Friday. The video in question, which after further pain-staking research, has been proven FALSE, was that of some people popping corn-kernels by means of cellphones. Yeah, I know what you're all thinking, you'd have to be some sort of blonde-pollock (P.S. I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW TO PROPERLY SPELL THAT WORD, PLEASE ADVISE) to believe something like that. Well... yeah. Apparently you do. I was devastated when I learned that it is in fact a hoax. Oh how I wanted that to be true! [On a side note, the services for my Childhood Innocence and Naivety will be held in approximately 20 minutes, behind the school.] So I need some ideas for a science project for this Friday... I just realized that I'm talking like someone actually reads this, but truth-be-told the only person who would actually read this is Creepy Noelle <3 who reads EVERYTHING, including my College Essays from 2004.
COLORING BOOK SEASON
MEMO TO SELF: GO TO DOLLAR STORE. PURCHASE FUCKED UP COLORING BOOK. GO TO TOWWWWN.
And that about does it, as far as I can remember.
Next time, Gadget, next time.
Yeah, uhh neither...do I...
Anyway, this will be Day 2 of I HAVE NOTHING TO DO AT WORK EXTRAVAGANZA
All long-term projects are complete, all cailin-generated (god help us all) training sessions are complete documented and ready to fire, and none of the hardware is smoking or sparking (more than usual) so I am left here to do nothing more than get into some serious shenanigans.
Allow me to briefly recap the events of Friday:
Jalapeno Jellybeans
Okay folks, seriously?! NOBODY told me?! It's like you all knew all this time, and it was some big spicy conspiracy to keep me out of the loop. "DID YOU KNOW THEY MAKE A JALAPENO JELLY BEAN?!" "uhh, yeah." Sure, just suck the excitement right out, and jab the straw into my eye socket.
...well, anyway, I discovered that Jelly Belly produces a line of Jalapeno Jellybeans, too hardcore to include in the standard mix, although they count the flavor as one of the 'original 50.' Note: the Original 50 mix (I'm sure there's a different/official name for it, but I don't give a care) only actually includes 49 flavors. Apparently the jalapeno bean is so badass that it wants to make all the rest of the beans taste like it does. I don't know how I feel about this, while part of me is like JALAPENO, FUCK YEAH! 'cause that's just awesome, I was disappointed to discover that I wouldn't be able to taste the jalapeno jelly bean without purchasing an individual-flavor pack. What if I (unbelieveably) don't like it? Then I'm stuck with a bag of nasty jelly confections. On the flip side of that though, if i don't wind up loving the shit out of them, I could always offer them up as Watermelon jelly beans just to watch peoples' faces...
A spectacular idea!
15 minutes and 9 dollars later...
Marvels of Modern Confectionary
The discovery of the jalapeno jelly bean and the discussions I had as a result led me to the 'discovery' (okay so someone told me about it) of other confection-marvels: Wasabi/Ginger & Maple/Bacon lollipops! Nothing more to say aside from pointing out my amazement. AMAZEMENT. And excitement. EXCITEMENT. I only hope that these lollipops turn out better than the horrible Combos experiments (RE: Bacon/egg/cheese-flavored Combos - sorry, never a good idea to make anything taste like a bacon egg and cheese sammich, except, of course, a bacon, egg and cheese sammich). MISSION!
General Advice
If you ever send an advertisement from a self-proclaimed homosexual periodical from a fake individual at a fake address (note: the name and/or address could in fact be real), DO NOT FORGET ABOUT THIS. Especially if it is more than one advertisement in multiple mailings to an Admissions Representative during the "busy season!" I cannot stress this enough! When you do forget about it, you never get closure! You'll find yourself asking...yourself questions like "What did he do with the ads?" "What did he say" and most importantly "WHAT WAS THE EXPRESSION ON HIS FACE?" as he must have come to the realization that the next 10 envelopes contain more! Now I find myself wondering, just wondering. I'll never know, and I can never ask. I'll just have to dig up another one of those magazines - which, might I add, ECTI somehow became subscribed to and although right up my alley, I honestly had nothing to do with it (DIVINE INTERVENTION MUCH?) - cut out some more advertisements and perhaps articles this time, and send them again. So, in conclusion, if you ever plan to partake in such an activity, be sure to keep your eyes peeled for the arrival of your little morsels in the mail or you'll be left with your dick hanging out, pretty much forever.
Science Project Friday
After receiving a video attachment from an email from my good ol' Uncle Gerry, I have made every Friday at ECTI OFFICIALLY Science Project Friday. The video in question, which after further pain-staking research, has been proven FALSE, was that of some people popping corn-kernels by means of cellphones. Yeah, I know what you're all thinking, you'd have to be some sort of blonde-pollock (P.S. I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW TO PROPERLY SPELL THAT WORD, PLEASE ADVISE) to believe something like that. Well... yeah. Apparently you do. I was devastated when I learned that it is in fact a hoax. Oh how I wanted that to be true! [On a side note, the services for my Childhood Innocence and Naivety will be held in approximately 20 minutes, behind the school.] So I need some ideas for a science project for this Friday... I just realized that I'm talking like someone actually reads this, but truth-be-told the only person who would actually read this is Creepy Noelle <3 who reads EVERYTHING, including my College Essays from 2004.
COLORING BOOK SEASON
MEMO TO SELF: GO TO DOLLAR STORE. PURCHASE FUCKED UP COLORING BOOK. GO TO TOWWWWN.
And that about does it, as far as I can remember.
Next time, Gadget, next time.