Work so hard all for what?
I can't believe I graduate in two months. I'm really not ready and I'm really depressed about it because I have nothing lined up. I've been applying selectively and I haven't heard anything back. I honestly feel like I have to be qualified for some kind of museum job but at the same time I don't feel qualified enough if that makes any sense. All this time I felt really confident in myself that I would find something but in the back of my head, I knew nothing is guaranteed. I'm just so tired of working and getting absolutely nothing out of it. I'm so fucking sick of this bull shit. I haven't volunteered in months because theres nothing for me to do and I've just lost interest. No surprise there, I get passionate about something and then completely loose interest.
I feel like with all this depressing talk of economics in my classes, I should see a therapist because it has made me o freaking distraught. Fuck capitalism they say. I can see why now.
Holy fuck I just lost my shit. I'm an emotional hot mess right now. I just had a flashback of me transferring to school two years ago. I'm overwhelmed with all this time thats passed. I feel like I'm back where I started again. Wtf am I supposed to do now? I need clarity and some perspective to tell me what's going on and what's going to happen. Maybe a tarot reading will help.
Afterall that said and done, I'm not doing so well in some of my classes. Art history is fucking brutal and the tests are insanely hard. Jesus fucking Christ what made me think these classes were going to be tolerable? That's also part of the reason why I decided not to walk across the stage. I would for me to do all that only to find out I didn't pass every class. However, part of me is also having regret because I've worked so hard for this for so long that the idea of me not going through the walk really depresses me. All that work and no climantic ending? Wtf is wrong with me. I think I'm gonna go read some suicide letters to make me feel worse.
I feel like with all this depressing talk of economics in my classes, I should see a therapist because it has made me o freaking distraught. Fuck capitalism they say. I can see why now.
Holy fuck I just lost my shit. I'm an emotional hot mess right now. I just had a flashback of me transferring to school two years ago. I'm overwhelmed with all this time thats passed. I feel like I'm back where I started again. Wtf am I supposed to do now? I need clarity and some perspective to tell me what's going on and what's going to happen. Maybe a tarot reading will help.
Afterall that said and done, I'm not doing so well in some of my classes. Art history is fucking brutal and the tests are insanely hard. Jesus fucking Christ what made me think these classes were going to be tolerable? That's also part of the reason why I decided not to walk across the stage. I would for me to do all that only to find out I didn't pass every class. However, part of me is also having regret because I've worked so hard for this for so long that the idea of me not going through the walk really depresses me. All that work and no climantic ending? Wtf is wrong with me. I think I'm gonna go read some suicide letters to make me feel worse.