The One Where Catherine Watches Jurassic Park
So it's Friday night and I'm watching Jurassic Park. Why? Because Jurassic Park is awesome.
And I was chatting to mythologiced about how the main problem was that they had carnivores in the thing. I mean, they could have had just a single craposaurus, the crappiest dinosaur to ever crap, and people would still flock to see it. Why?
COZ IT'S A FREAKING DINOSAUR.
Anyway, partway through the movie, the conversation about where Hammond went wrong devolved into, amongst other things, capslock and commentary.
(Warning: Some swearing and spoilers if you haven't see Jurassic Park.)
Catherine: AH THERE'S RIPPLES IN THE WATER IN THE CUPS
mythologiced: HO SHIT SON
Catherine: I CAN HEAR HUGE FOOTSTEPS
mythologiced: SHIT JUST GOT REAAAAAAAAAAL.
Catherine: AH THERE'S A GOAT PIECE ON THE SKYLIGHT OF THE CAR
Catherine: AND THE LAWYER IS OUT OF THE CAR
Catherine: HE'S HEADING TO THE BATHROOM
mythologiced: what a dumbfuck, oh man
Catherine: THIS WAS ONE OF MY FAVE BITS AT AGE FIVE FUCK YEAh
mythologiced: AGREED.
Catherine: (meanwhile my nana was snoring besides me what)
mythologiced: haha
Catherine: (in the theatre!)
Catherine: IT'S OUT OF THE ENCLOSURE
Catherine: DON'T GET THE FLASHLIGHT
Catherine: DON'T SHUT THE DOOR
Catherine: THE DINOSAUR IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE
Catherine: AND NOW IT'S THROUGH THE ROOF
Catherine: AND NOW IT'S DR GRANT: ACTION PALEONTOLOGIST TO THE DISTRACTION RESCUE
Catherine: PLAY FETCH GIANT T-REX
Catherine: AND HE'S IN THE BATHROOM
Catherine: WELL, THERE IS NO BATHROOM NOW
Catherine: LAWYER JUST GOT EAT
mythologiced: LOL
Catherine: AND DR GRANT JUST LOST HIS HAT
Catherine: HE AND INDIANA JONES SHOULD HAVE THEIRS ATTACHED BY BUNGY CORDS OR SOMETHING
Catherine: SAMUEL L. JACKSON I DON'T THINK IT'S APPROPRIATE TO BE SMOKING IN THE WORKPLACE.
mythologiced: haha
mythologiced: IN THIS SITUATION, GDI, IT'S TOTALLY APPROPRIATE
mythologiced: SHIT JUST GOT REAL, SON.
Catherine: I KNOW IT'S VERY STRESSFUL, BUT BE CONSIDERATE OF THE OTHER PEOPLE
Catherine: WE ARE HOLDING ONTO OUR BUTTS
mythologiced: HE'S SAMUEL L. MOTHERFUCKING JACKSON. THE HELL DOES HE CARE? HE'LL SMOKE IF HE FEELS LIKE IT. IN FACT, HAND HIM THAT LIGHTER. IT'S THE ONE THAT SAYS BAD MOTHERFUCKER ON IT.
mythologiced: /shot
Catherine: GLASSES: MORE THINGS THAT SHOULD BE ATTACHED TO BUNGY CORDS
mythologiced: haha.
Catherine: AL OF AL'S TOY BARN JUST GOT SPRAYED IN THE EYES. THAT'LL TEACH HIM TO KIDNAP WOODY AND TRY AND SELL HIM TO A TOY MUSEUM.
Catherine: OH, NOW HE'S EATEN TOO
mythologiced: haha
Catherine: I THINK THE CHILDREN ARE GOING TO NEED LOTS OF THERAPY AFTER THIS
mythologiced: lol
Catherine: MAN, IMAGINE BEING HIT BY A CAR WHEN IT'S FALLING OUT OF A TREE.
Catherine: I WONDER IF DR GRANT LEARNED THESE AWESOME SURVIVAL SKILLS IN PALEONTOLOGY CLASS
Catherine: RIPPLES IN THE PUDDLE OH NOES
Catherine: TYRANNOSAURS IN REAR-VIEW MIRROR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR
mythologiced: LOL
Catherine: AND... DINOSNOT.
Catherine: UH OH EGGS IN THE WILD
Catherine: FROGS DO NOT CONFORM TO YOUR VIEWS ON GENDER AND SEX
Catherine: DR GRANT YOUR PRIORITIES ARE SERIOUSLY SCREWED IF YOU ARE FASCINATED BY WATCHING THE T-REX EAT WHEN YOU COULD BE HIDING
mythologiced: LOOOOOOOOOOL
Catherine: "IF THE PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN BREAKS DOWN, THE PIRATES DON'T EAT THE TOURISTS"
SO... AM I THE ONLY ONE PICTURING JACK SPARROW GOING "WHY HAVE ALL THE TOURISTS GONE?"
mythologiced: HAHAHAHAHA
Catherine: OH SHIT RAPTORS ARE LOOSE
mythologiced: OH SHIT SON
Catherine: THEY'RE DOOMED
Catherine: CLIMB THE FENCE CLIMB THE FENCE
Catherine: THEY'RE ON THE FENCE AND THE POWER IS COMING BACk ON
Catherine: ONE. TWO. BLAST-OFF THE FENCE
Catherine: AH RAPTOR
mythologiced: LOL
mythologiced: your commentary is hilar.
Catherine: APPARENTLY WHEN SAMUEL L. JACKSON DIES AND IS DISMEMBERED, HE GETS WHITER.
mythologiced: LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
Catherine: I am gonna have to blog this
mythologiced: YES.
Catherine: THANK YOU DISCRETION SHOT FERNS
Catherine: CPR: THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING
mythologiced: haha
Catherine: I think I may have a new hobby/series of blog posts. "Capslock Catherine Watches Movies"
mythologiced: LOL YES
Catherine: THE RULES OF A HORROR MOVIE STATE YOU DON'T SAY YOU'LL BE RIGHT BACK, ALAN GRANT. BUT DESPITE THE BLOOD AND DEATH AND GORE, I THINK YOU'LL BE OKAY
Catherine: SHADOWRAPTOR AHOY
mythologiced: HAAHAH
Catherine: I WAS STAYING AT SOMEONE'S HOUSE AND OCCUPYING THE "CAT'S ROOM" FOR SLEEPING. THEY WOULD SHUT THE DOOR BECAUSE I WAS ALLERGIC. THE CAT WOULD OPEN THE DOOR AND JUMP ON ME ANYWAY.
Catherine: IF A CAT CAN OPEN THE DOOR, DO NOT BE SURPRISED THAT RAPTORS CAN TOO
mythologiced: this.
Catherine: IT'S JUST ONE OF THOSE PUSH-DOWN ONES.
Catherine: ROUND-TURNY-ONES WOULD HAVE PREVENTED THIS.
Catherine: ALSO, YOU KNOW, NOT HAVING CARNIVORES AS PART OF THE PARK. BUT IT'S TOO LATE FOR THAT
mythologiced: OOPS.
Catherine: RAPTORS: CAN OPEN DOORS, BUT ARE STILL BESTED BY REFLECTIONS
Catherine: THE KIDS SHOULD SUE THEIR GRANDFATHER FOR THERAPY MONEY
mythologiced: OH GOD.
Catherine: ALSO IF I WAS THEIR MOTHER, THEY WOULD NEVER BE GOING TO GRANDFATHER'S ISLAND OF DINOSAURS AGAIN.
mythologiced: WELL YEAH. OBVS.
Catherine: ALSO HIS HOUSE. GOD KNOWS HOW MANY COMPYS HE HAS IN THE BASEMENT
mythologiced: they'd never be going anywhere with grandpa. ever.
Catherine: WELL. FUNERAL.
mythologiced: okay, but that might as well be a party.
Catherine: HIS THOUGH. BECAUSE I WOULD KILL HIM
mythologiced: LOL AGREED.
Catherine: Man, the SFX hold up on this movie really well
mythologiced: lol y
Catherine: Not like that scene in Labyrinth with the fieries and the really bad greenscreen
Catherine: CLIMBING ON THE DINOSAUR SKELETON THING BREAKS LIKE EVERY MAJOR RULE OF VISITING THE MUSEUM. I MEAN REALLY.
Catherine: WELL, LOOK AT THIS! APPEARS THE T-REX GOT HERE JUST IN THE NICK OF TIME. WHAT DOES THAT MAKE IT?
BIG DAMN HERO, SIR!
Catherine: SEE DR GRANT YOU DO LIKE KIDS.
Catherine: GOD KNOWS YOU'D BE A BETTER PARENT THAN HAMMOND, AT ANY RATE
Catherine: AND CREDITS.
And I was chatting to mythologiced about how the main problem was that they had carnivores in the thing. I mean, they could have had just a single craposaurus, the crappiest dinosaur to ever crap, and people would still flock to see it. Why?
COZ IT'S A FREAKING DINOSAUR.
Anyway, partway through the movie, the conversation about where Hammond went wrong devolved into, amongst other things, capslock and commentary.
(Warning: Some swearing and spoilers if you haven't see Jurassic Park.)
Catherine: AH THERE'S RIPPLES IN THE WATER IN THE CUPS
mythologiced: HO SHIT SON
Catherine: I CAN HEAR HUGE FOOTSTEPS
mythologiced: SHIT JUST GOT REAAAAAAAAAAL.
Catherine: AH THERE'S A GOAT PIECE ON THE SKYLIGHT OF THE CAR
Catherine: AND THE LAWYER IS OUT OF THE CAR
Catherine: HE'S HEADING TO THE BATHROOM
mythologiced: what a dumbfuck, oh man
Catherine: THIS WAS ONE OF MY FAVE BITS AT AGE FIVE FUCK YEAh
mythologiced: AGREED.
Catherine: (meanwhile my nana was snoring besides me what)
mythologiced: haha
Catherine: (in the theatre!)
Catherine: IT'S OUT OF THE ENCLOSURE
Catherine: DON'T GET THE FLASHLIGHT
Catherine: DON'T SHUT THE DOOR
Catherine: THE DINOSAUR IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE
Catherine: AND NOW IT'S THROUGH THE ROOF
Catherine: AND NOW IT'S DR GRANT: ACTION PALEONTOLOGIST TO THE DISTRACTION RESCUE
Catherine: PLAY FETCH GIANT T-REX
Catherine: AND HE'S IN THE BATHROOM
Catherine: WELL, THERE IS NO BATHROOM NOW
Catherine: LAWYER JUST GOT EAT
mythologiced: LOL
Catherine: AND DR GRANT JUST LOST HIS HAT
Catherine: HE AND INDIANA JONES SHOULD HAVE THEIRS ATTACHED BY BUNGY CORDS OR SOMETHING
Catherine: SAMUEL L. JACKSON I DON'T THINK IT'S APPROPRIATE TO BE SMOKING IN THE WORKPLACE.
mythologiced: haha
mythologiced: IN THIS SITUATION, GDI, IT'S TOTALLY APPROPRIATE
mythologiced: SHIT JUST GOT REAL, SON.
Catherine: I KNOW IT'S VERY STRESSFUL, BUT BE CONSIDERATE OF THE OTHER PEOPLE
Catherine: WE ARE HOLDING ONTO OUR BUTTS
mythologiced: HE'S SAMUEL L. MOTHERFUCKING JACKSON. THE HELL DOES HE CARE? HE'LL SMOKE IF HE FEELS LIKE IT. IN FACT, HAND HIM THAT LIGHTER. IT'S THE ONE THAT SAYS BAD MOTHERFUCKER ON IT.
mythologiced: /shot
Catherine: GLASSES: MORE THINGS THAT SHOULD BE ATTACHED TO BUNGY CORDS
mythologiced: haha.
Catherine: AL OF AL'S TOY BARN JUST GOT SPRAYED IN THE EYES. THAT'LL TEACH HIM TO KIDNAP WOODY AND TRY AND SELL HIM TO A TOY MUSEUM.
Catherine: OH, NOW HE'S EATEN TOO
mythologiced: haha
Catherine: I THINK THE CHILDREN ARE GOING TO NEED LOTS OF THERAPY AFTER THIS
mythologiced: lol
Catherine: MAN, IMAGINE BEING HIT BY A CAR WHEN IT'S FALLING OUT OF A TREE.
Catherine: I WONDER IF DR GRANT LEARNED THESE AWESOME SURVIVAL SKILLS IN PALEONTOLOGY CLASS
Catherine: RIPPLES IN THE PUDDLE OH NOES
Catherine: TYRANNOSAURS IN REAR-VIEW MIRROR ARE CLOSER THAN THEY APPEAR
mythologiced: LOL
Catherine: AND... DINOSNOT.
Catherine: UH OH EGGS IN THE WILD
Catherine: FROGS DO NOT CONFORM TO YOUR VIEWS ON GENDER AND SEX
Catherine: DR GRANT YOUR PRIORITIES ARE SERIOUSLY SCREWED IF YOU ARE FASCINATED BY WATCHING THE T-REX EAT WHEN YOU COULD BE HIDING
mythologiced: LOOOOOOOOOOL
Catherine: "IF THE PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN BREAKS DOWN, THE PIRATES DON'T EAT THE TOURISTS"
SO... AM I THE ONLY ONE PICTURING JACK SPARROW GOING "WHY HAVE ALL THE TOURISTS GONE?"
mythologiced: HAHAHAHAHA
Catherine: OH SHIT RAPTORS ARE LOOSE
mythologiced: OH SHIT SON
Catherine: THEY'RE DOOMED
Catherine: CLIMB THE FENCE CLIMB THE FENCE
Catherine: THEY'RE ON THE FENCE AND THE POWER IS COMING BACk ON
Catherine: ONE. TWO. BLAST-OFF THE FENCE
Catherine: AH RAPTOR
mythologiced: LOL
mythologiced: your commentary is hilar.
Catherine: APPARENTLY WHEN SAMUEL L. JACKSON DIES AND IS DISMEMBERED, HE GETS WHITER.
mythologiced: LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
Catherine: I am gonna have to blog this
mythologiced: YES.
Catherine: THANK YOU DISCRETION SHOT FERNS
Catherine: CPR: THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING
mythologiced: haha
Catherine: I think I may have a new hobby/series of blog posts. "Capslock Catherine Watches Movies"
mythologiced: LOL YES
Catherine: THE RULES OF A HORROR MOVIE STATE YOU DON'T SAY YOU'LL BE RIGHT BACK, ALAN GRANT. BUT DESPITE THE BLOOD AND DEATH AND GORE, I THINK YOU'LL BE OKAY
Catherine: SHADOWRAPTOR AHOY
mythologiced: HAAHAH
Catherine: I WAS STAYING AT SOMEONE'S HOUSE AND OCCUPYING THE "CAT'S ROOM" FOR SLEEPING. THEY WOULD SHUT THE DOOR BECAUSE I WAS ALLERGIC. THE CAT WOULD OPEN THE DOOR AND JUMP ON ME ANYWAY.
Catherine: IF A CAT CAN OPEN THE DOOR, DO NOT BE SURPRISED THAT RAPTORS CAN TOO
mythologiced: this.
Catherine: IT'S JUST ONE OF THOSE PUSH-DOWN ONES.
Catherine: ROUND-TURNY-ONES WOULD HAVE PREVENTED THIS.
Catherine: ALSO, YOU KNOW, NOT HAVING CARNIVORES AS PART OF THE PARK. BUT IT'S TOO LATE FOR THAT
mythologiced: OOPS.
Catherine: RAPTORS: CAN OPEN DOORS, BUT ARE STILL BESTED BY REFLECTIONS
Catherine: THE KIDS SHOULD SUE THEIR GRANDFATHER FOR THERAPY MONEY
mythologiced: OH GOD.
Catherine: ALSO IF I WAS THEIR MOTHER, THEY WOULD NEVER BE GOING TO GRANDFATHER'S ISLAND OF DINOSAURS AGAIN.
mythologiced: WELL YEAH. OBVS.
Catherine: ALSO HIS HOUSE. GOD KNOWS HOW MANY COMPYS HE HAS IN THE BASEMENT
mythologiced: they'd never be going anywhere with grandpa. ever.
Catherine: WELL. FUNERAL.
mythologiced: okay, but that might as well be a party.
Catherine: HIS THOUGH. BECAUSE I WOULD KILL HIM
mythologiced: LOL AGREED.
Catherine: Man, the SFX hold up on this movie really well
mythologiced: lol y
Catherine: Not like that scene in Labyrinth with the fieries and the really bad greenscreen
Catherine: CLIMBING ON THE DINOSAUR SKELETON THING BREAKS LIKE EVERY MAJOR RULE OF VISITING THE MUSEUM. I MEAN REALLY.
Catherine: WELL, LOOK AT THIS! APPEARS THE T-REX GOT HERE JUST IN THE NICK OF TIME. WHAT DOES THAT MAKE IT?
BIG DAMN HERO, SIR!
Catherine: SEE DR GRANT YOU DO LIKE KIDS.
Catherine: GOD KNOWS YOU'D BE A BETTER PARENT THAN HAMMOND, AT ANY RATE
Catherine: AND CREDITS.