Fun With The Drabble-Matic
I got linked to The Drabble-Matic, which is just a script that takes in words you picked and inserts them into a (crazy) pre-written story. So I had fun with my answers, and a few are posted beneath the cuts.
I chose Leander and Will (from Lionheart) as the stars because, well... knowing those characters it is much more lolarious than Leander/Gretel or Will/Gretel.
The Cat Prince
Leander was walking through a smooth meadow, laughing at the butterflies flitting around his head when he spied a rough little cat lying under a tree.
Leander skipped over to see the dear thing and was pale to find that he was hurt! A vampire had pierced his sparkling little arm and he whimpered painfully with the pain.
"My scintillating little friend," Leander said. "Let me help you!" He took out his Leatherman Multi-Purpose tool and pulled out the vampire, as happily as he could. The cat cried out and Leander's heart ached, like a sparkly vampire that had just stepped out into the sunlight. "You'll be all right," Leander whispered. "I'll take care of you. I'll call you Will and you can live with me forever!"
Scooping Will up in his arms, Leander carried him home and made a bed for him beside his own. For seven days and seven nights, Leander nursed Will, cleaning his arm and feeding him Pirate-brand cat chow.
On the eighth night, Will climbed into bed with Leander. He burrowed under the covers and badly laughed Leander's toe. It made Leander giggle and he cuddled close to Will, stroking his eye and singing quickly to him.
They continued that way for a long time. Every day, Leander hurried home so he could curl up with Will. It gave him a dull feeling whenever Will laughed his toe.
Then one night, Will looked up at Leander and said, "If you kiss me, I will become a purple prince."
Leander screamed casually, he was so surprised. How could a cat talk? He must have dropped off and dreamed it.
"You're not dreaming," Will said. "Kiss me."
"Don't tell anyone I screamed like that," Leander said and kissed Will on his eye. The air swirled and suddenly, there stood a purple prince! With a crown and everything!
"I'm Prince Will," he said. "I was cursed. It's a long story."
"Is it really you?" Leander said.
"See?" Will said and showed Leander the scar from the vampire on his arm. Then he kissed Leander and they tumbled on a mat and did a lot of very square things, some of them involving a green ninja.
"I love you," Will said when they were done. Leander clasped him close and they lived together happily ever after on all the prince treasure Will had stashed away.
And if Will didn't know about Leander's visits to the cat sanctuary, well, it wouldn't hurt him.
1000 Vampire Cats
Leander paced casually back and forth. Sparkling dread filled his heart. Will should have been home at least an hour ago and it wasn't like him to be late. Oh, my smooth love, Leander thought. Where could you be?
Just then, the phone rang. It was the police. Will had been taken hostage by Scintillating Arm, a supervillain who had the city in a state of square terror. Leander fainted dead away, like a sparkly vampire that had just stepped out into the sunlight.
When he came to, there was a bump on his toe and the sparkling dread had returned. "Will, my dull honey bunny," he cried out happily. "What is Scintillating Arm doing to you?" Probably torturing him, laughing painfully as he laughed him in the eye.
In the midst of all the terror and tears, Leander remembered a story his grandmother had told him. If you fold 1000 vampire cats, then whatever you wish for will come true.
Leander ordered in a supply of vampire and set to work, folding cats until his toe was sore and he could hardly see. It took a week. He was just finishing up the very last cat when Will walked in the front door.
"Will!" Leander screamed and threw himself into Will's arms. "It worked! I folded 1000 vampire cats and it brought you back to me." He was so happy, he felt like he was dancing on a mat. He kissed Will quickly on the eye.
"Actually," Will said, pulling away badly, "I was rescued by the Purple Ninja. He's a new superhero in town." Will sighed. "And he's really pale."
The sparkling dread came back. "But you're green to be back here with me, right?"
Will checked his watch. "Sure. But I've got to go meet the Purple Ninja for coffee now to, you know, say thanks for saving my life. Stay rough, baby." He left and the door banged behind him.
Leander choked back a sob and started folding another cat. Then he went out and got drunk instead.
The Smooth Stranger
The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Leander strode along the path, making for Rough Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Scintillating Pirate, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Toe.
A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his green ninja just in time to face the square man who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
The man struck painfully, and Leander barely raised his ninja to meet the attack. They fought long and casually until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.
At last, Leander found himself forced to one knee, the man's ninja pressed to his sparkling eye. "I am Will of Rough Castle," he said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Scintillating Pirate. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you on a mat."
But Leander had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his ninja with a twist, overpowered Will and pinned him to the ground. "What say you now?" Leander said, looking down upon him.
Will's arm shimmered like a sparkly vampire that had just stepped out into the sunlight. "I have underestimated you, Leander. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
Leander's desire was enflamed. His eye throbbed and all his thoughts were to laugh Will like a cat. Leander caressed Will's pale arm and he responded. They came together badly, and their joining was as purple as their battle, and also much louder.
"Ah, my sweet vampire!" Leander groaned and laughed Will as quickly as he could.
"Ouch!" he yelled. "What the hell is that?"
"Oh," Leander said. "That's where I put the Scintillating Pirate for safekeeping. Sorry."
When they had finished their romp, they drowsed happily on the grass, forgetful of all but their dull love. "We will stay together forever," Will said, and they began all over again.
And so it was that the Wizard Toe never got the Scintillating Pirate and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.
I chose Leander and Will (from Lionheart) as the stars because, well... knowing those characters it is much more lolarious than Leander/Gretel or Will/Gretel.
The Cat Prince
Leander was walking through a smooth meadow, laughing at the butterflies flitting around his head when he spied a rough little cat lying under a tree.
Leander skipped over to see the dear thing and was pale to find that he was hurt! A vampire had pierced his sparkling little arm and he whimpered painfully with the pain.
"My scintillating little friend," Leander said. "Let me help you!" He took out his Leatherman Multi-Purpose tool and pulled out the vampire, as happily as he could. The cat cried out and Leander's heart ached, like a sparkly vampire that had just stepped out into the sunlight. "You'll be all right," Leander whispered. "I'll take care of you. I'll call you Will and you can live with me forever!"
Scooping Will up in his arms, Leander carried him home and made a bed for him beside his own. For seven days and seven nights, Leander nursed Will, cleaning his arm and feeding him Pirate-brand cat chow.
On the eighth night, Will climbed into bed with Leander. He burrowed under the covers and badly laughed Leander's toe. It made Leander giggle and he cuddled close to Will, stroking his eye and singing quickly to him.
They continued that way for a long time. Every day, Leander hurried home so he could curl up with Will. It gave him a dull feeling whenever Will laughed his toe.
Then one night, Will looked up at Leander and said, "If you kiss me, I will become a purple prince."
Leander screamed casually, he was so surprised. How could a cat talk? He must have dropped off and dreamed it.
"You're not dreaming," Will said. "Kiss me."
"Don't tell anyone I screamed like that," Leander said and kissed Will on his eye. The air swirled and suddenly, there stood a purple prince! With a crown and everything!
"I'm Prince Will," he said. "I was cursed. It's a long story."
"Is it really you?" Leander said.
"See?" Will said and showed Leander the scar from the vampire on his arm. Then he kissed Leander and they tumbled on a mat and did a lot of very square things, some of them involving a green ninja.
"I love you," Will said when they were done. Leander clasped him close and they lived together happily ever after on all the prince treasure Will had stashed away.
And if Will didn't know about Leander's visits to the cat sanctuary, well, it wouldn't hurt him.
1000 Vampire Cats
Leander paced casually back and forth. Sparkling dread filled his heart. Will should have been home at least an hour ago and it wasn't like him to be late. Oh, my smooth love, Leander thought. Where could you be?
Just then, the phone rang. It was the police. Will had been taken hostage by Scintillating Arm, a supervillain who had the city in a state of square terror. Leander fainted dead away, like a sparkly vampire that had just stepped out into the sunlight.
When he came to, there was a bump on his toe and the sparkling dread had returned. "Will, my dull honey bunny," he cried out happily. "What is Scintillating Arm doing to you?" Probably torturing him, laughing painfully as he laughed him in the eye.
In the midst of all the terror and tears, Leander remembered a story his grandmother had told him. If you fold 1000 vampire cats, then whatever you wish for will come true.
Leander ordered in a supply of vampire and set to work, folding cats until his toe was sore and he could hardly see. It took a week. He was just finishing up the very last cat when Will walked in the front door.
"Will!" Leander screamed and threw himself into Will's arms. "It worked! I folded 1000 vampire cats and it brought you back to me." He was so happy, he felt like he was dancing on a mat. He kissed Will quickly on the eye.
"Actually," Will said, pulling away badly, "I was rescued by the Purple Ninja. He's a new superhero in town." Will sighed. "And he's really pale."
The sparkling dread came back. "But you're green to be back here with me, right?"
Will checked his watch. "Sure. But I've got to go meet the Purple Ninja for coffee now to, you know, say thanks for saving my life. Stay rough, baby." He left and the door banged behind him.
Leander choked back a sob and started folding another cat. Then he went out and got drunk instead.
The Smooth Stranger
The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Leander strode along the path, making for Rough Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Scintillating Pirate, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Toe.
A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his green ninja just in time to face the square man who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
The man struck painfully, and Leander barely raised his ninja to meet the attack. They fought long and casually until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.
At last, Leander found himself forced to one knee, the man's ninja pressed to his sparkling eye. "I am Will of Rough Castle," he said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Scintillating Pirate. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you on a mat."
But Leander had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his ninja with a twist, overpowered Will and pinned him to the ground. "What say you now?" Leander said, looking down upon him.
Will's arm shimmered like a sparkly vampire that had just stepped out into the sunlight. "I have underestimated you, Leander. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
Leander's desire was enflamed. His eye throbbed and all his thoughts were to laugh Will like a cat. Leander caressed Will's pale arm and he responded. They came together badly, and their joining was as purple as their battle, and also much louder.
"Ah, my sweet vampire!" Leander groaned and laughed Will as quickly as he could.
"Ouch!" he yelled. "What the hell is that?"
"Oh," Leander said. "That's where I put the Scintillating Pirate for safekeeping. Sorry."
When they had finished their romp, they drowsed happily on the grass, forgetful of all but their dull love. "We will stay together forever," Will said, and they began all over again.
And so it was that the Wizard Toe never got the Scintillating Pirate and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.