(no subject)
no one uses livejournal anymore so its safe to say that i can write almost anything i want. this posting will be a 1 in the morning random rant.
i try to be brave but sometimes i cant even stand on my own two feet. when i look into the mirror, i cant see myself. the one person i want in my life, i push away. constantly struggling trying to find a happy medium. i moved to an area where i could get my life together. went and completed school yet there are no jobs. isnt new york the city of opportunity? some days are pleasant while others i wish to lay in bed all day. not always sleeping.. just laying in bed. lay around and stare at the ceiling. there are no windows in this place. i dont know how i cope without the sunlight. i talk a lot to keep my mind off things. to tell you the truth, i hate small talk. the only thing that escapes my vocal chords could be classified under small talk. id like to know how you are expected to make friends in an area like this where no one makes eye contact. shot down for "hellos". doors only sometimes held.
i try to be brave but sometimes i cant even stand on my own two feet. when i look into the mirror, i cant see myself. the one person i want in my life, i push away. constantly struggling trying to find a happy medium. i moved to an area where i could get my life together. went and completed school yet there are no jobs. isnt new york the city of opportunity? some days are pleasant while others i wish to lay in bed all day. not always sleeping.. just laying in bed. lay around and stare at the ceiling. there are no windows in this place. i dont know how i cope without the sunlight. i talk a lot to keep my mind off things. to tell you the truth, i hate small talk. the only thing that escapes my vocal chords could be classified under small talk. id like to know how you are expected to make friends in an area like this where no one makes eye contact. shot down for "hellos". doors only sometimes held.