when you love someone and they break your heart<3.
I'm seriously writing an entry at 4;30 in the morning because I can't really sleep anymore. I've been thinking way too much about things I shouldn't even be dwelling on. It just sucks that I know I'm not going to have closure on any of this. I'm not going to get to say what I want to say because the person wouldn't listen even if I pinned him down and screamed in his face. I've written letters, spent sleepless nights thinking, cried more times than I could possibly count.
I hate having so many feelings pour out at once; it makes me feel so weak.
And all I even wanted to know is why. What did I do to deserve getting hurt the way I am right now. All you had to do was tell me. You could have gotten anyone to tell me. Anyone. I wouldn't have cared, just so long as I knew why. It's ridiculous that this feeling has happened twice, and the last time it was with someone kind of close to this guy. ( Definitely not planned ! ) It's like he stole half my heart and you got the other half.
So when can I get it back from the both of you?
This is ridiculous. I should be asleep. I should be HAPPY. I'm 17 years old, but I feel so worn out that it seems like I'm 40. I don't smile as much anymore. Every time my sister brings you up, I wanna cry. She still loves you, you know. Makes me kind of sad that one of her favorite people isn't gonna see her again because hs randomly decides to hate and ignore her sister. It's ridiculous. Why bother getting to "know" someone's family if you're just going to get up and leave? Why bother risking everything if you're just gonna leave everything in a state where no one knows what the hell is going on?
Why bother lying if the person is going to find out anyway?