[Open Post] No cheeky stories, please, we're from Gormenghast

[77th_earl]

Titus never really cared much for books, yet since his arrival at the Mansion, he's been spending more time in the Library, poring through the volumes there, particularly during periods of rough weather

Comments

Because this has the potential to be hilarious...

[gettin2old4this]

In comes the little old lady that ko'ed you on Halloween, Titus. She frowns at him. Titus has potential, but he needs to learn how to man up. (Although if she knew what was going on between him and Aramat, she would be... amused.)

"Titus... you're reading." She means no ill will, but it's really hard to tell with that frown of hers.

Anyone else you'd like?

It does... she could really rip him up...

[77th_earl]

He slams the book closed quicker than he probably should, looking up from it with a blushing face. "I'm sorry, Madame Genkai, I did not hear you approach: I was... rather wrapped up in reading."

[gettin2old4this]

Genkai just stares at him. "Thats why you need to learn how to be more aware... it may mean the difference between life and death."

She then looks a bit... curious. "What were you reading, and do you have a fever?"

Genkai: Always looking for the answers.

[77th_earl]

He glances at the book, trying to think of a polite way to put this: one has to be especially considerate with ladies and with ones elders, and this book is the sort of thing Nannie Slagg would box his ears for reading. "I suppose one could call it a collection of humorous and colorful poetry and prose, " he replies.

[gettin2old4this]

Especially when this Elder is capable of making you fly across the room.

She cocks a eyebrow. "Really? Are you sure you aren't sick?"

"May I see this collection."

[77th_earl]

He's sick now: his face is slowly turning pale and then green. Titus glances at the book, then back to Genkai. "I am quite well," he says. "But I think I would rather you did not see the inside of this. I don't think it would be...seemly for a lady of your years."

Does Titus have a porn addiction or something?

[gettin2old4this]

The green is telling. Seemly?

"Try me, Titus. I've had plenty of students that have tried to read plenty of questionable material."

Keyword: tried. Genkai doesn't really have an good opinion over pornography, as being 'one of the boys' in her Academy she's seen so much of it, she doesn't want to see one form of it again in her personal life. She doesn't judge it in others though, it does waste time however, and Genkai does hate wasted time.

If you have such feelings like that, find yourself a girl or whatever floats your boat.

Well, he's been repressed all his life, thus he's likely going a bit overboard now...

[77th_earl]

But if he has one, Genkai can likely cure him of it, one way or another...

He draws in a breath. "Very well, but prepared to be shocked. It can be rather...outré in places, and the level of detail in it's descriptions can be graphic. Witty but graphic," he says, and he hands over the book to her, quivering a bit, expecting any reaction, up to and including getting his ears boxed.

[gettin2old4this]

Weird, I'm reading this pervy story,while my resident Victorian Lady is most likely having that done to her right now. >_> By another lady no less...

She takes the book and reads an excerpt from it:

Turning the key in the lock, we at once laid her over the foot of our bed, with her feet resting on the floor, and turning up her nightdress, administered with our hands a good slapping till she fairly screamed for mercy...

She stops for a good minute to let that sink in...

And she laughs, almost convulsing in it.

Of course, Titus doesn't know that Genkai usually never laughs or smiles out loud. Meaning that, something is wrong.

Heh-heh-heh, RP imitates art much??

[77th_earl]

Titus manages a small nervous smile. He wasn't expecting this response, but he's oblivious to what could happen. "It is rather silly stuff, is it not?" he asks, a bit hesitant, hoping for the best.

[gettin2old4this]

New mansion rule: If Genkai grins, don't ask questions... run. Or at least attempt it. You have just activated a spiritual nuclear warhead.

"It is... although can I ask why are you reading such material?"

She wants a explanation before she beats you like you owe her money, Titus.

[77th_earl]

He's at a loss for an explanation, to be frank, and he's silent, his thoughts fumbling, but he finds his voice eventually. "I found the shelf where this book was hidden, and I suppose that it was that discreet corner which caught my curiosity. I had to see why these books would be secreted away, and so I took it out to read it." He's being as honest as he can, but he's still hesitating to tell the old woman more.

[gettin2old4this]

"So it was curiously that brought you to this book..."

She closes it.

[77th_earl]

He doesn't stop her from closing the book. If anything, he seems a bit relieved that she closed it. "Yes, I confess, that is what lead me to this volume," he admits.

[gettin2old4this]

Genkai merely smiles and tells Titus matter-of-factly: "And it's going to give you a small concussion."

Without any warning at all, she beats her student viciously over the head with the volume, relentlessly, without yielding at all, hard too, but not hard enough...

She doesn't want to kill a student over porno.

[77th_earl]

Death by pr0n would be a fittingly Gormenghastian way to die, given the number of strange deaths that have taken place: people falling out of windows and drowning in puddles or getting chewed to death by owls (or buried alive in books, in one unfinished fic that typist has in her notebooks).

Titus sighs deeply, with something akin to relief, and sags sideways in his chair, not even putting up a fight at all. He's that passive or that much of a gentleman, or both.