[i really don't think]
i love music anymore. no, seriously. people who love things do them or think about them or have them around all the time. i can barely remember to push the play button. i don't even know what i want to listen to. and when i do listen, i spend the whole time feeling guilty for not writing my own stuff, but when i do write my own stuff i feel
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2. your heart disappeared with your music. i think you might want to give up making it for a little while. i had to. i'm still in it. i havent been given permission to make music again yet. so make a concious decision that this is not the time in your life to make music. and become an appreciator. learn to love it. listen to it without singing along (i know...sounds impossible right?) but let it take hold of you. let someone else's talent and beauty carry you where you cannot carry yourself. you still do love music, or you would not have lost your heart over it. you are just holding onto it in a way that you maybe cant, or shouldnt have right now. so learn to listen to it again. you have time. learn for a year maybe. or longer. learn to let the sound of it wash over you and move your soul in a way that nothing else can. force yourself to remain still and quiet. it will be hard at first, but it gets easier. eventually you will start to sing along again, but you will be able to laugh at how foolish your harmonies sound and you will not mind that you are not as beautiful as the person singing. it takes a long time, but it happens. and then, at last, when you simply cannot contain what is inside of you, because it must be expressed like tears or breath...then you should write. but by then you will not care if it is good or bad, because it really doesn't matter.
i'm sending you some songs in the e-mail tonight. you should listen to each of them enough times to feel like they are inside your head. i'll explain each of them more in the e-mail. i'd say this comment is *quite* long enough.
3. i love you too.
4. when i get there, we can make music together.
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