The silly season
Things are quiet here in the Cooperative--we don't have a story in the works (yet), there's no fresh Who, nor even pictures from filming, and a number of us have yet to see Hamlet.
So what's a group to do?
Mock things, of course, And, in this particular instance, mock the US Life on Mars. It all started innocently enough yesterday, when the Honest Porcupine was bemoaning her job. The Honest Porcupine is a Woman of Much Writerly Talent, and it was suggested she put in for a job with io9; her classic Honest Porcupine response was, "That would be one of the best jobs ever. Well, at least until I had a deadline and an assignment I didn't want, like: Give us 600 words on how the US LoM is superior to the original. To which I'd reply, "How about two words? I. Quit.""
The Compiler, being a clever sort, immediately rejoined with, "You could take that topic and twist it. "Reason No. One the US LoM Is Better than the Original: The lead actor isn't nearly as compelling, so the show isn't nearly as addictive, and this is better for your social life, because you spend less time watching the show alone in your apartment.""
At which point things spiralled out of control, and the following list was born.
Reason #1 the US LoM Is Better than the Original: The lead actor isn't nearly as compelling, so the show isn't nearly as addictive, and this is better for your social life, because you spend less time watching the show alone in your apartment."
Reason #2 the US LoM Is Better Than The Original: The 1970's look far more dreadful and boring than they did in the original, and there is no true Gene Genie, so you will not be tempted to throw yourself into the path of passing cars to hopefully be struck into a coma and sent there.
Reason #3 the US LoM Is Better Than The Original: The lead actor is so unappealing he may actually turn you off men for good and make you want to become a lesbian, which could, over time, lead to a decrease in the birth rate thereby saving the planet from complete destruction by overpopulation.
Reason #4 the US LoM Is Better Than The Original: You are no longer tempted to spend money on a vintage vehicle, since nothing could be as cool as the *real* Gene's Cortina. And in these dreadful economic times, saving money is good!
Reason #5 the US LoM Is Better Than The Original: Seeing Annie's feathered blonde tresses reminds you why you chose to go brunette, which in turn has saved you hundreds of dollars over the course of a year--as well as preventing your repeated exposure to toxic peroxide fumes, thus prolonging your life expectancy.
Reason #6 the US LoM Is Better Than The Original: Harvey Keitel is no hack--but his weak attempt at playing Gene only reminds you of the the sheer, misogynistically sexy awesomeness of Phil Glenister in the role.
Reason #7 the US LoM Is Better Than The Original: The lack of any reference to Hoops will keep otherwise culinarily curious Americans blissfully eating their Spaghetti-O's and Chef Boy-Ar-Dee can breathe a sigh of relief for the health of his business.
Reason #8 the US LoM Is Better Than The Original: Absence of sexy Brits=Lower expectations for American men.
Reason #9 the US LoM Is Better Than The Original: Gene Hunt's insults will likely be watered down or eliminated entirely for reasons of political correctness, thus preserving our delicate American sensibilities, and also saving us the time and trouble of Googling terms like "uphill gardner" to see what the heck he's talking about.
Reason #10 the US LoM Is Better Than The Original: Stay out of Camberwick Green!
We still anticipate having the Hamlet HQ up by (US) Thanksgiving--that's time enough for all of us to have seen it (some twice, lucky dogs), to recover from it, and to put our thoughts to paper. That assumes, of course, that the Compiler doesn't get buried unter heaps and heaps of work again, as happened to her in September.