The final goodbye...
I said goodbye to my Grandpa this afternoon. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I know he's not dead yet but that was definately the last time I'll speak to him. My brother and I are both just completely numb with grief, it's so hard to explain.
I went in with Andy and my Grandpa told me to sit on the bed with him so I did and he was thirsty so he said " nurse, can you get me some water?" so I did and then gave it to him through a straw. Anyway, we chatted for a little while and it got too much for me so I left and just said " I'll leave you to get some rest Grandpa". I then said "you just have a nice sleep in your bed grandpa" and he said " yeah, I'll do that but soon I'll be asleep up there" and pointed to the sky. Anyway that completely got me so I left and then Andy stayed and chatted and came through a little while later in tears and seeing my brother in tears completely set me off and I had to leave the house for a bit. I went and sat in the car and just cried and cried and cried and thought to myself, " I can't leave it like that" so I composed myself a bit and went back in. I just went through with my mum and Andy and my dad and just said " bye Grandpa" and gave him a big cuddle and a kiss and he just went " Bye Lucy, I'll see ya laterrrr".
Needless to say, I'm just absolutely gutted right now. I don't really have any words to describe it. I guess now it's just a waiting game.
I love you Grandpa, don't ever forget that.
I went in with Andy and my Grandpa told me to sit on the bed with him so I did and he was thirsty so he said " nurse, can you get me some water?" so I did and then gave it to him through a straw. Anyway, we chatted for a little while and it got too much for me so I left and just said " I'll leave you to get some rest Grandpa". I then said "you just have a nice sleep in your bed grandpa" and he said " yeah, I'll do that but soon I'll be asleep up there" and pointed to the sky. Anyway that completely got me so I left and then Andy stayed and chatted and came through a little while later in tears and seeing my brother in tears completely set me off and I had to leave the house for a bit. I went and sat in the car and just cried and cried and cried and thought to myself, " I can't leave it like that" so I composed myself a bit and went back in. I just went through with my mum and Andy and my dad and just said " bye Grandpa" and gave him a big cuddle and a kiss and he just went " Bye Lucy, I'll see ya laterrrr".
Needless to say, I'm just absolutely gutted right now. I don't really have any words to describe it. I guess now it's just a waiting game.
I love you Grandpa, don't ever forget that.