(no subject)
Hiatus
July 19 - 31
My throat swells closed every time I try to think about the words I want to say in this entry. I don't know where to begin, how to say it, or even how all this started. All I know though, is that something very major is wrong with me, and whatever it is it's absolutely destroying my personal relationships. Every second of every day I am crippled by extreme paranoia and an overwhelming sense of insecurity. One minute I'm completely fine, the next I'm crying so hard I'm vomiting. I know the thoughts and feelings I've been having are not "me". I know that SOMETHING has to be very wrong. I can't eat to save my life and I can't even sleep, even though it's the only thing I want to do. I want to be normal again, I want to be able to function around other people again. I want my life back.
I honestly feel like I'm losing my mind and I'm fucking watching it happen.