(no subject)
Last batch! Apologies for the delay, heh. The next open app date will be announced soon. If there are any issues with applications (i.e. it wasn't posted, or ... I don't know), please e-mail us with who you apped. mello at kodou.com gets to me relatively quickly. We'll get back to you ASAP!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Poll, closed. eizra, dead. D:
Character: Nigel Uno (alias "Numbuh 1") [More info found here]
Series: Codename: Kids Next Door [A good place to go for info is here]
Age: 10
Canon: Numbuh 1 is the bald, workaholic, British-born leader of Sector V, brave and an excellent tactician. He's also quite skilled in the martial arts and stealth coupled with the basic Kids Next Door training in building and using 2x4 technology. Highly respected in the organization, he was once offered the position of Kids Next Door Global Tactician, but turned it down in favor of remaining with his team following the incident with Grandfather and Numbuh Zero. He is intelligent, confident, and proud of himself and his friends and teammates.
However, his gifts are the proverbial double-edged sword. One will overanalyze the situation sometimes, leaping to conclusions which can lead to disasterous results. His confidence can lead to overconfidence, which--when coupled with these incorrect assumptions--compounds the original problem ten-fold. He can also be overzealous and will occasionally panic. He's also paranoid and distrustful of anyone over the age of thirteen with a particular dislike towards teenagers, but,while it's difficult for his loyalty and friendship to be won by anyone in that age set, it can be done. At the same time, he's still Nigel Uno, the ten year-old boy with very childish fears such as needles and an outright terror of insects.
Sample Post:
Why do parents always insist on sending their kids on "character building experiences"? I'd rather hang out with my friends and go on missions! I never wanted to go to stupid camp in the middle of the stupid woods! Now I don't even know where I am, but I do know they never mentioned zombies in the brochure!
As if zombies weren't enough, I'm surrounded by teenagers and adults! Fantastic! My summer vacation just went from terrible to apocalyptic!
Hopefully, I can scrounge enough materials to build some decent 2x4 tech to ward off some of the zombies. While it may not be lethal to the living, I'm sure a SPLANKER to the face is rather effective on the undead.
Poll Vote!
Character: Fighter
Series: 8-Bit Theatre Webcomic (Linkness)
Age: Unspecified. Presumably late teens, like most RPG
heroes.
Canon: Fighter is a fighter. His goals are
collecting shiny things, swords, shiny swords, and kicking ass with swords
(which he does exceptionally well) . He is a member of the Light Warriors
who are involved in a long quest to collect the orbs, while causing mayhem
and destruction, lining their own pockets, and pursuing the perfect stat
balance. He is simple minded beyond belief, good natured and trusting,
unfailingly upbeat, and prone to pointing out the obvious at inopportune
moments, and revealing his comrade's weaknesses to their enemies
accidentally. His fellow Light Warriors are his original traveling
companion, Black Mage, a homicidal madman who hates Fighter's guts; Thief,
who would sell his own mother for three gil, and Red Mage, who is obsessed
with his (purported) intellect and his character sheet. They are followed
around by the Virtuous White Mage. (As a canon example, watch as Fighter
endures the Trial of Sloth: pg 1, pg 2.) Swordopolis is
the messenger of Fighter's Destiny.
Sample Post:
Uh... Hello? Has anyone here seen Dr. Swordopolis? Or maybe they've seen my
destiny instead...? Dr. Swordopolis said it was time for me to find my
destiny. I didn't even know I ever owned a destiny, but I must've lost it
somewhere, or I wouldn't need to find it. Sounds cool though, I bet it's a
type of sword! That's why he sent me here, to the fabled land of
Sword-O-Topia. He zapped me here straight from the foggy depths of my
subconscious with a space-time slice. It's this really-neat sword-related
teleport technique that rends the fabric of reality itself! It requires
'absolute focus' in order to reach the desired location.... or something, I
was too busy telling him about Family Circus to listen to the last part.
Now that I look around, though, it doesn't look like I imagined
Sword-O-Topia to be. First off, there aren't enough swords around at all,
though there does seem to be a very large number of the undead. They're no
help to anyone though. Can't even tell me if they've seen my destiny around
anywhere without trying to bite me. Heh. Apparently they don't know that
I've mastered the twelve schools of the unbeatable Vargus Technique!
Manticores and monstrous spiders alike have fallen to my supremely kick-ass
swordery skill! I can precisely rend even the most minute of particles into
innumerable perfect shards with my keen blade!! No mere zombie could compete
with my swordtastic awesomeness! They came at me like 'Graaah!' and I was
like SLICE!BANG!SWORD!, and they were all like 'ARRRGH, *DIE*!' and it was
cool because I totally kick ass. Who else would have conceived of the
sword-chuck? I figure any weapon that allows me to use more swords
must be a good Idea!
Too bad my fellow Light Warriors can't be here with me. Especially Black
Mage. BM and I are BESTEST friends forever, and it'll be hard getting by
without RM and his insightful solutions to problems, or Thief, and his
unfaltering concern for his fellow warriors. But I cannot be distracted by
their absence! I must press on, as a Light Warrior, sworn to pursue my
destiny and rescue the world from Chaos! To be rewarded for the legendary
duty of a Light Warrior with a place in the eternal library of heroism, and
the gratitude of the world for their deliverance from the Dark Lord!
...and maybe some shiny new armor, with cool spikes!
Poll Vote!
Character: Nakatsu Shuichi
Series: Hana-Kimi
Age: 17
Canon: Nakatsu is just your average male student. Except for the fact that he attends an all-boys school and struggles against his seemingly gay feelings for his "male" friend, Mizuki. Since he doesn't know that Mizuki is a girl he is constantly fighting his inner emotions and conscience! However, he has accepted his feelings and decided to pursue Mizuki full throttle. Nakatsu's character is friendly, optimistic, outgoing, emotional, and rash. He's also pretty dense and stubborn, but over all he's a good friend with a big heart. His main hobbies include soccer (his nickname on the school team is the "blazing lion" of Osaka Academy), eating, and thinking about/stalking Mizuki.
Sample Post:
Attention campers! I, Nakatsu Shuichi, have resolved to become a better man in the name of love! I plan on becoming the sort of guy that Mizuki couldn’t help but fall in love with. When my time here is through I shall be a shining pillar of manhood.
Starting now I shall give up all luxuries. Please do not offer to let me stay in your cabins; sleeping outside builds character and creates opportunities for manly battles with nature. I know, I know. The things a guy, or rather, a man, does for love can seem crazy!
Already I am working on phase one of my strict training regime; a five o’clock shadow or other equally impressive facial hair. I will become his rock, his shoulder to cry on! Phase two will be “shoulder broadening training!” If there’s one thing that is completely irresistible, it’s a strong, broad pair of shoulders. Tomorrow’s plans include zombie mud wrestling and making my famous takoyaki with tentacle monster.
I will need the support and encouragement of everyone here in order to achieve my goals. Now, while I am addressing you guys, let me say this: I don’t mind people going through my things. Sharing is caring right? But I have to insist that no one, and I mean no one, touches my mail. I am expecting a monthly issue of Grizzly Man magazine and these are key to the success of my training. And the success of my training is key to winning Mizuki's heart!
Oh Mizuki! Absence really does make the heart grow fonder! Don’t worry though, I will return as soon as I am worthy of you. But you better watch out, because when I come home, you won’t know what hit you!
Poll Vote!
Character: Sophie Hatter
Series: Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones
Age: 19 (looks about 70-80)
Canon: Sophie Hatter is the eldest of three sisters and in the land of Ingary it is believed that because of this she will never have much success in life. Sophie resigns herself to this fate early in life and thinks nothing exciting will ever happen to her. Then one day as she helps in her family's hat shop the evil Witch of the Waste puts her under a spell. Aged into an old woman and unable to tell anyone about it, Sophie leaves her home in search of a cure and ends up involving herself with the wicked Wizard Howl, said to steal the hearts and souls of young girls.
When Sophie looked her correct age she was rather quiet and shy, but when she is an old woman she gains confidence and develops a rather snoopy and stubborn personality. Things that would have bothered her or frightened her when she looked young don't surprise her in the least and she tends to treat them as every day events. She feels very comfortable in her old skin and complains and grumbles just like any old woman.
Sample Post:
Young man! Yes, yes you with the missing ears. Come here and help me! Can't you see that I am about to fall down on the ground? Don't look at me so surprised, You should help your elders! Oh..Oh dear. Why, you don't even have eyes! How ever did you lose something like that? I'll help you look but only after I've had my rest.
Tell me, where am I? Brains? No, no. I'm asking where I am, not- Oh forget it. I see a sign up ahead. Let's see! Camp Fu- Oh, that can't be right. Who would write something like that where anyone can see it? You're a bad sign! Bad! You shouldn't let children see you with such nasty things written on you.
Oh, come here smelly. The town is probably close. If you help me get there I promise I'll help find your eyes. What? Yes, yes, brains too. Just come along and bring my things. These woods don't look dangerous but they don't look like the Waste either. I wonder where exactly I ended up.
Hmm, a lake. Yes, this can't be the Waste. I suppose I'll just have to rest here a bit and- No! Bad fish! Leave that poor eyeless man alone. Leave him I say! Yes, the stick hurts. You deserve it too. You should be ashamed! Attacking sweet old ladies and people missing parts. What kind of upbringing did you have? You're mother would be very disappointed this is where you ended up!
Oh, don't be like that. I'm sure your mother loves you for whatever it is you are.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kasumi Fuu
Series: Samurai Champloo
Age: 15
Canon: Samurai Champloo is about. . . well, a lot of things. First and foremost, it's the story of a young girl named Fuu (and sometimes her pet squirrel, Momo-san) who's on a quest to find the "samurai that smells of sunflowers." During the first episode, she saves and recruits two unwilling men--Jin the stoic samurai, and Mugen, the wild warrior--to help her as her bodyguards. They travel all over Edo-period Japan (with a hip-hop twist), taking odd jobs to help fund their journey, and dealing with important historical issues like graffiti taggers, ninja baseball, beatboxing, zombies, hallucinogenic drugs, and eccentric foreigners. Yeah, well. . . the series never claimed to be completely accurate.
Fuu has a bright, cheerful, personality, and more often than not is very accepting of those she comes across (however, if you annoy her, don't expect to hear the end of it anytime soon). Her usually-sunny disposition definitely doesn't stop her from getting into trouble; this girl has been kidnapped more times than a Final Fantasy heroine. But in such situations, Fuu's upbeat personality peels away to reveal a will of steel and unstoppable determination; she's incredibly resourceful, and isn't afraid to ask others for help. Fuu also has the tendency to act much more wordly, knowledgeable, and attractive than she really is, in order to impress her makeshift bodyguards (it never works). And she talks. A lot. Ditto her love of food.
However, it's not all fun and games. Fuu suffers from a tragic past, complete with an absentee father and a dead mother. She seeks closure, and she'll put up with anything--even those two emotionally retarded excuses for companions--to get it.
Note: Fuu is being taken from before the series' ending.
Sample Post:
Momo-san, I've a feeling that we're not in Kansai anymore. I knew we shouldn't have let the illiterate read the map for us. . .
Ah, so maybe you all can help me! I'm looking for someone, you see, and it's really very important that I find him! Well, if you want to get more accurate, three someones. Two of them are my bodyguards, and they really tend to stand out a lot so I guess you'd notice them if you saw them, but more importantly. . . has anyone seen a samurai that smells of sunflowers? It's complicated, and I can't give you very much information, but. . . well, like I said. It's important.
And I would like to thank you all for the, ah, the warm welcome! Especially since you all look really bad, like you're sick and on your last leg or something--that's a joke by the way, hah! Because that man over there only has one leg, hahaha. . . hah? Right, well, like I said, thanks, but I'd ask that you don't get too friendly. Please? It's really nice of you to be interested, but I've got prior commitments! Washing my hair! Things like that!
. . .Oh man, I just wish it wasn't always the weirdos that were interested in me--ah, not that I can't get a nice guy, because I definitely can! Definitely! I'm just much too busy for that sort of thing. It's just that it's never the nice guys that drug me, or kidnap me, or use me as a human shield, so I never get a really good chance to talk to them, which isn't really fair. And all the other guys are too cocky, too ugly, too loud, too rude, or, in this case, falling apart.
The bad pick-up lines are sort of the same all over, though.
Not only does "Is this your arm? Because I think you lost it while running through my head all day," not make sense, but it isn't really a nice thing to tell a woman! Neither is "Wanna sit in my lap and see what falls off?" I understand that they might have limited material, looking at some of the falling-apart-y women they have here, but that's just weak! I admit that "Oh baby, you're so BRAAAAINS" was a little flattering, because people don't often tell me I look smart! I guess it just takes an observant person to pick up on that. The idiots I travel with are usually just calling me stupid and saying "Oh Fuu, be quiet!" and "Oh Fuu, stop rambling so much, no one wants to listen to you! If you don't shut up, we're going to leave!" and that's obviously preposterous, because who wouldn't want to listen to m--
--hey, where did everybody go?!
Poll Vote!
Character: Ritsu Sohma
Series: Fruits Basket
Age: 20-21 (university student)
Canon: Fruits Basket (commonly known as Furuba) is an average shoujo series. Published in a magazine with a prerequisite girly name, it features high school romance! Drama! Action! Adventure! People who are cursed to turn into animals from the Chinese Zodiac when hugged by members of the opposite sex! Wait. What?
Ritsu Sohma is the Monkey of the Zodiac, who appears to be a reserved, thoughtful woman who dresses in traditional Japanese clothing. In actuality, Ritsu is not only male, but he's an over-timid, over-apologetic, over-reacting university student who spazzes and flails at every small fault, even if it's not his. It runs in his family, and in fact, Ritsu grew up wishing that he could stop being a person his parents had to apologise for. Dressing in woman's clothing calms him down, due to the thought that women do not need to be as assertive as men, though it really can't do anything about his gullibility. He dislikes offending people, and in fact, in his quest to be as non-offensive as possible, Ritsu ends up being far more annoying than if he quieted and accepted the fact that sometimes these things. Just. Happen.
At the moment, Ritsu's idol is the beautiful, confident Aya-nii-san, also known as Ayame Sohma, with whom he wishes to take confidence lessons. Also, as a note for the app, the Jyuunishi seem to have the ability to understand or communicate with their cursed animals.
Sample Post:
Aya-nii-san, I am so sorry. I know you stress confidence and being assertive, but when the purple gorillas dropped down from the trees and began to drag me away, I was just so startled that-- I know it's not an excuse or anything! I am so, so sorry that I just couldn't tell them no when they put me in the burlap sack -- AND I'M SORRY GORILLA-SAN IT'S A VERY NICE SACK, DON'T GET ME WRONG! THE BURLAP CHAFES IN JUST THE RIGHT WAY THAT ONE WOULD EXPECT FROM FINE, UPSTANDING GORILLAS or do you prefer to be called guerillas? SUCH AS YOURSELF AND I'M SORRY, PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CONTINUE SWINGING ME AROUND!
Gorilla-san, I just don't know what you would want with a worthless human like me, especially since I'm not even fit enough to be kidnapped by appropriately coloured gorillas - N-NOT THAT PURPLE ISN'T A VERY NICE COLOUR! IT IS, AND I'M SORRY, IT LOOKS NICE ON YOU AND I'LL APOLOGISE TO ALL THE GORILLAS WHEREVER YOU'RE TAKING ME! OF COURSE, I'LL APOLOGISE TO EVERYONE ELSE AND THE WHOLE WORLD AND THE WHOLE UNIVERSE IF THEY'LL TAKE THE TIME TO LISTEN, AND FEEL FREE TO COLOUR ME PURPLE AS WELL!
. . . ah! Okay, yes. Yes, I see you've found what everyone always referred to as my weakspot. I'm sorry for asking, but could you please refrain from repeatedly poking it, Ms. Gorill-ah, Mr. Gorilla? I'm sorry. I-I'm sorry, I should have known better. It's just a small thing, I know, and you've given me this lovely laptop, and the ah, means of transportion really isn't that bad -- NO, NO IT'S WONDERFUL IT REALLY IS! P-please don't apologise to me, I should be the one groveling-- no, kissing your feet--no, I would be GLAD to do anything that you ask of me, Mr. Gorilla!
. . . except t--
ETA: Aya-nii-san, I'm sorry to ask, but could you possibly please send help? I know you can't possibly sacrifice the time, or manpower, or the resources to look, and once again, I'm sorry that I have to ask, and it's all my fault for getting in this mess in the first place, but I seem to be in the middle of what looks like a nest of purple gorillas and it seems as though even I can't get out of this one.
I'm sorry!
Poll Vote!
Character: Zorn and Thorn
Series: Final Fantasy IX
Age: late teens, early twenties?
Canon: The ninth Final Fantasy game follows the heartwarming adventures of Zidane, a thief whose merry band kidnaps the Princess Garnet. Of course, Zidane quickly falls in love with the spunky princess, who agrees a little too happily to travel with the group of lowlifes that forcibly abducted her from her home, and he works hard to save her from many things, including her insane mother the Queen, Kuja the prettyboy antagonist... and a pair of freaky twin jesters, named Zorn and Thorn, who seem to manage to annoy absolutely everyone, including the people they work for.
Zorn and Thorn are very close, inseperable twins, but they are easily told apart. Zorn wears red, casts fire magic, and talks like a normal annoying evil jester; Thorn wears blue, casts ice magic, and speaks like an annoying evil jester with brain damage. He constantly talks in inverted sentences. Like this, it is. They also have a habit of only saying a few sentences each and then repeating each other. Repeating each other, they have a habit of doing. They repeat each other a lot. Get the picture? (They also have a habit of, several times, realizing they're in a bad spot, yelling "Run away!" and twirling off.)
Despite working for the bad guys, Zorn and Thorn are arguably Not That Bad; they tell the Black Mages they're in charge of to kill and slay, but when it comes down to removing Eidolons from Eiko, they hesitate be cause doing so would kill her. They're incredibly intelligent, having built the Black Waltzes themselves. Even if they're constantly working for the wrong people, they are terribly loyal. And...
[spoilers]
Kuja reveals, after Zidane and party rescue Eiko from the Eidolon extraction, that Zorn and Thorn are "not really twins at all." The jesters, which Eiko KO'd with Terra Homing, float up into the air to some sort of pulse that sounds like a twin heartbeat... which makes a lot more sense when they merge together. It turns out that Zorn and Thorn were originally one creature! They had been split into two seperate people somehow, but they are, in fact, the same person deep down. Zorn and Thorn are Meltigemini, a two-headed jester-like monster that has a completely poisonous atmosphere.
[/spoilers]
Zidane's party eventually beats them, and they die. They are being pulled from after this point in the game. (Dark red is Zorn speaking.)
Sample Post:
You, who are you? What is this place?
Lost we are. Woke up in the swamp, we did, covered in goop. But resting on Phoenix Down pillows we were. Expecting that we were not.
Never mind! What is this place? We must find Kuja. If we live, we still have a job to do. We are…
…?! Camp Fuck You Die?? That is not a good name!
Too dangerous and forbidding that name is! Died we have already, hostile this place seems. Full of monsters, the forest was. Wandered for days we have. Strange are the items they’ve dropped.
The items they’ve dropped are strange. Some spongy food cakes with white in the middle, a box of stretchy rubber things.
A large purple monkey there is on it. Like the look in his eye I do not.
They are not food. Their taste is very… strange. Ba… ba-na-na con-doms… I wonder…
N-now is not the time to wonder! Sidetracked, we are being! Explain this all to us, you will, before we get angry! …Rather close you are getting.
You are getting rather close… It is not important. Let's kill him, shall we?
Yes, kill him we--wait.
Ba-na-na con-doms go where?
…We shall depart.
Depart we shall.
Run away!
Poll Vote!
Character: Sagan Youji
Series: Loveless
Age: 12
Canon: Youji is one half of Zero, a genetically-altered fighting team incapable of feeling 'pain.' Their creator, Professor Nagisa, created Zero to prove that the lack of pain would translate into a lack of fear when fighting. Her creations cannot feel physical pain, heat, or cold, but they are still affected by the results (i.e. hypothermia, blisters, etc...). The boys are extremely dependent on each other and trust each other implicitly.
Of the two, Youji is the louder, brasher and more reckless boy. ...He's also a bit of a smartass. Youji would be the one to insult and laugh at you and is far less inclined to make friends with others. His idea of fun? Poking a hole in your side to see what your liver looks like. Other than Nagisa, the only one Youji will listen to is his partner, Natsuo. Natsuo is also the only one he completely and utterly needs. They don't ever want to be apart, saying that if one falls, the other should follow.
Sample Post:
Bored. This place was s'posed to be fun! It even has a cool name an' everything, with "You Die" in it. There shoulda been dead people everywhere! ...real dead people, I mean. Not those smelly ones that walk around and wouldn't react when I poked them. Stupid things didn't even care where I poked them. They just kinda groaned and dribbled this nasty, sticky stuff all over me. Ew.
I've been here a whole twenty minutes and I'm bored. Boredboredbored. The birds quit coming up with new colors after ten minutes. D'ya know how hard it is to catch on'a those things and toss it at the barrier? 'Sides, the blood's still red. If it's gonna make'm rainbow colored, it should make everything rainbow colored. Doin' just the feathers is dumb. Red's real pretty, yeah, but everyone has red blood. Booooooring. If this place can make birds who talk and never shut up, it should also make blood that, like. Does stuff! Interesting stuff like makin' it blow up when you set the bodies on fire. That'd be cool!
Hey, hey, you wanna play with me? I know lotsa games~! Like, like, I think I saw somethin' moving in the trees... Whoever lands a critical hit first wins, 'kay? I've got knives! ...Don't look at me like that, 's' FUN. Y'gotta try it to know, see. I've played it lots 'n' lots and I'm real good~. We'll have lots of fun together~!
Poll Vote!
Character: Echizen Ryoma
Series: Prince of Tennis
Age: 12
Canon: Prince of Tennis: A shounen manga/anime series that
follows young and talented Echizen Ryoma. Against all precedence,
Echizen becomes a regular member of Seigaku Tennis Club at the age of
twelve, determined to defeat anyone in his way.
As he struggles in his quest to beat his father, the famed Echizen
"Samurai" Nanjiroh, he slowly cultivates friendships with his
teammates and widens the scope of his goals to something beyond
beating his father. Echizen is cocky, arrogant, and self-assured.
With the help of Captain Tezuka, and other members of the tennis club,
Echizen learns to overcome every hurdle he faces as he strives to
fashion his own style of tennis.
In the meantime, he drinks a lot of Ponta and takes more than a few
naps in the shade. He's especially fond of his cat, Karupin, and his
best friend, fellow teammate, Momoshiro. Echizen's not particularly
verbose unless his taunting his opponents, and teaching them that they
still have a ways to go.
Sample Post:
Has anyone seen a tennis ball with a face drawn on it around here? It
should be around here, somewhere. I'm Echizen Ryoma, by the way.
There's a thing playing with my ball. I really need to get back
to my match, so I need to get it back. I had better make this quick.
Huh.
It ran away. With my tennis ball.
It better hope nothing disgusting gets on my ball. I'm not going to
let him get away with this. I'm still far from done.
What is this place? There's a sign. Heh. Camp Fuck You Die.
Che, this is going to be one of those days.
Great, where did that thing go now? There're some strange sounds
coming from over there. What is going-nevermind. I'm going to pretend
I don't see that, so I don't have to get involved.
I'll just get a new ball.
This place is strange. Pity I can't stay here longer. Maybe I should
bring my dad back here someday. And leave him.
Can someone tell me how to get back to the tennis courts?
Poll Vote!
Remember!
- Applicants, respond anonymously.
- If you're going to do the whole "ask me if I voted you out!" thing, please state who you voted out.
- No speculating about the identity of the applicants!
Now VOTE. Poll, closed. eizra, dead. D:
Character: Nigel Uno (alias "Numbuh 1") [More info found here]
Series: Codename: Kids Next Door [A good place to go for info is here]
Age: 10
Canon: Numbuh 1 is the bald, workaholic, British-born leader of Sector V, brave and an excellent tactician. He's also quite skilled in the martial arts and stealth coupled with the basic Kids Next Door training in building and using 2x4 technology. Highly respected in the organization, he was once offered the position of Kids Next Door Global Tactician, but turned it down in favor of remaining with his team following the incident with Grandfather and Numbuh Zero. He is intelligent, confident, and proud of himself and his friends and teammates.
However, his gifts are the proverbial double-edged sword. One will overanalyze the situation sometimes, leaping to conclusions which can lead to disasterous results. His confidence can lead to overconfidence, which--when coupled with these incorrect assumptions--compounds the original problem ten-fold. He can also be overzealous and will occasionally panic. He's also paranoid and distrustful of anyone over the age of thirteen with a particular dislike towards teenagers, but,while it's difficult for his loyalty and friendship to be won by anyone in that age set, it can be done. At the same time, he's still Nigel Uno, the ten year-old boy with very childish fears such as needles and an outright terror of insects.
Sample Post:
Why do parents always insist on sending their kids on "character building experiences"? I'd rather hang out with my friends and go on missions! I never wanted to go to stupid camp in the middle of the stupid woods! Now I don't even know where I am, but I do know they never mentioned zombies in the brochure!
As if zombies weren't enough, I'm surrounded by teenagers and adults! Fantastic! My summer vacation just went from terrible to apocalyptic!
Hopefully, I can scrounge enough materials to build some decent 2x4 tech to ward off some of the zombies. While it may not be lethal to the living, I'm sure a SPLANKER to the face is rather effective on the undead.
Poll Vote!
Character: Fighter
Series: 8-Bit Theatre Webcomic (Linkness)
Age: Unspecified. Presumably late teens, like most RPG
heroes.
Canon: Fighter is a fighter. His goals are
collecting shiny things, swords, shiny swords, and kicking ass with swords
(which he does exceptionally well) . He is a member of the Light Warriors
who are involved in a long quest to collect the orbs, while causing mayhem
and destruction, lining their own pockets, and pursuing the perfect stat
balance. He is simple minded beyond belief, good natured and trusting,
unfailingly upbeat, and prone to pointing out the obvious at inopportune
moments, and revealing his comrade's weaknesses to their enemies
accidentally. His fellow Light Warriors are his original traveling
companion, Black Mage, a homicidal madman who hates Fighter's guts; Thief,
who would sell his own mother for three gil, and Red Mage, who is obsessed
with his (purported) intellect and his character sheet. They are followed
around by the Virtuous White Mage. (As a canon example, watch as Fighter
endures the Trial of Sloth: pg 1, pg 2.) Swordopolis is
the messenger of Fighter's Destiny.
Sample Post:
Uh... Hello? Has anyone here seen Dr. Swordopolis? Or maybe they've seen my
destiny instead...? Dr. Swordopolis said it was time for me to find my
destiny. I didn't even know I ever owned a destiny, but I must've lost it
somewhere, or I wouldn't need to find it. Sounds cool though, I bet it's a
type of sword! That's why he sent me here, to the fabled land of
Sword-O-Topia. He zapped me here straight from the foggy depths of my
subconscious with a space-time slice. It's this really-neat sword-related
teleport technique that rends the fabric of reality itself! It requires
'absolute focus' in order to reach the desired location.... or something, I
was too busy telling him about Family Circus to listen to the last part.
Now that I look around, though, it doesn't look like I imagined
Sword-O-Topia to be. First off, there aren't enough swords around at all,
though there does seem to be a very large number of the undead. They're no
help to anyone though. Can't even tell me if they've seen my destiny around
anywhere without trying to bite me. Heh. Apparently they don't know that
I've mastered the twelve schools of the unbeatable Vargus Technique!
Manticores and monstrous spiders alike have fallen to my supremely kick-ass
swordery skill! I can precisely rend even the most minute of particles into
innumerable perfect shards with my keen blade!! No mere zombie could compete
with my swordtastic awesomeness! They came at me like 'Graaah!' and I was
like SLICE!BANG!SWORD!, and they were all like 'ARRRGH, *DIE*!' and it was
cool because I totally kick ass. Who else would have conceived of the
sword-chuck? I figure any weapon that allows me to use more swords
must be a good Idea!
Too bad my fellow Light Warriors can't be here with me. Especially Black
Mage. BM and I are BESTEST friends forever, and it'll be hard getting by
without RM and his insightful solutions to problems, or Thief, and his
unfaltering concern for his fellow warriors. But I cannot be distracted by
their absence! I must press on, as a Light Warrior, sworn to pursue my
destiny and rescue the world from Chaos! To be rewarded for the legendary
duty of a Light Warrior with a place in the eternal library of heroism, and
the gratitude of the world for their deliverance from the Dark Lord!
...and maybe some shiny new armor, with cool spikes!
Poll Vote!
Character: Nakatsu Shuichi
Series: Hana-Kimi
Age: 17
Canon: Nakatsu is just your average male student. Except for the fact that he attends an all-boys school and struggles against his seemingly gay feelings for his "male" friend, Mizuki. Since he doesn't know that Mizuki is a girl he is constantly fighting his inner emotions and conscience! However, he has accepted his feelings and decided to pursue Mizuki full throttle. Nakatsu's character is friendly, optimistic, outgoing, emotional, and rash. He's also pretty dense and stubborn, but over all he's a good friend with a big heart. His main hobbies include soccer (his nickname on the school team is the "blazing lion" of Osaka Academy), eating, and thinking about/stalking Mizuki.
Sample Post:
Attention campers! I, Nakatsu Shuichi, have resolved to become a better man in the name of love! I plan on becoming the sort of guy that Mizuki couldn’t help but fall in love with. When my time here is through I shall be a shining pillar of manhood.
Starting now I shall give up all luxuries. Please do not offer to let me stay in your cabins; sleeping outside builds character and creates opportunities for manly battles with nature. I know, I know. The things a guy, or rather, a man, does for love can seem crazy!
Already I am working on phase one of my strict training regime; a five o’clock shadow or other equally impressive facial hair. I will become his rock, his shoulder to cry on! Phase two will be “shoulder broadening training!” If there’s one thing that is completely irresistible, it’s a strong, broad pair of shoulders. Tomorrow’s plans include zombie mud wrestling and making my famous takoyaki with tentacle monster.
I will need the support and encouragement of everyone here in order to achieve my goals. Now, while I am addressing you guys, let me say this: I don’t mind people going through my things. Sharing is caring right? But I have to insist that no one, and I mean no one, touches my mail. I am expecting a monthly issue of Grizzly Man magazine and these are key to the success of my training. And the success of my training is key to winning Mizuki's heart!
Oh Mizuki! Absence really does make the heart grow fonder! Don’t worry though, I will return as soon as I am worthy of you. But you better watch out, because when I come home, you won’t know what hit you!
Poll Vote!
Character: Sophie Hatter
Series: Howl's Moving Castle by Diana Wynne Jones
Age: 19 (looks about 70-80)
Canon: Sophie Hatter is the eldest of three sisters and in the land of Ingary it is believed that because of this she will never have much success in life. Sophie resigns herself to this fate early in life and thinks nothing exciting will ever happen to her. Then one day as she helps in her family's hat shop the evil Witch of the Waste puts her under a spell. Aged into an old woman and unable to tell anyone about it, Sophie leaves her home in search of a cure and ends up involving herself with the wicked Wizard Howl, said to steal the hearts and souls of young girls.
When Sophie looked her correct age she was rather quiet and shy, but when she is an old woman she gains confidence and develops a rather snoopy and stubborn personality. Things that would have bothered her or frightened her when she looked young don't surprise her in the least and she tends to treat them as every day events. She feels very comfortable in her old skin and complains and grumbles just like any old woman.
Sample Post:
Young man! Yes, yes you with the missing ears. Come here and help me! Can't you see that I am about to fall down on the ground? Don't look at me so surprised, You should help your elders! Oh..Oh dear. Why, you don't even have eyes! How ever did you lose something like that? I'll help you look but only after I've had my rest.
Tell me, where am I? Brains? No, no. I'm asking where I am, not- Oh forget it. I see a sign up ahead. Let's see! Camp Fu- Oh, that can't be right. Who would write something like that where anyone can see it? You're a bad sign! Bad! You shouldn't let children see you with such nasty things written on you.
Oh, come here smelly. The town is probably close. If you help me get there I promise I'll help find your eyes. What? Yes, yes, brains too. Just come along and bring my things. These woods don't look dangerous but they don't look like the Waste either. I wonder where exactly I ended up.
Hmm, a lake. Yes, this can't be the Waste. I suppose I'll just have to rest here a bit and- No! Bad fish! Leave that poor eyeless man alone. Leave him I say! Yes, the stick hurts. You deserve it too. You should be ashamed! Attacking sweet old ladies and people missing parts. What kind of upbringing did you have? You're mother would be very disappointed this is where you ended up!
Oh, don't be like that. I'm sure your mother loves you for whatever it is you are.
Poll Vote!
Character: Kasumi Fuu
Series: Samurai Champloo
Age: 15
Canon: Samurai Champloo is about. . . well, a lot of things. First and foremost, it's the story of a young girl named Fuu (and sometimes her pet squirrel, Momo-san) who's on a quest to find the "samurai that smells of sunflowers." During the first episode, she saves and recruits two unwilling men--Jin the stoic samurai, and Mugen, the wild warrior--to help her as her bodyguards. They travel all over Edo-period Japan (with a hip-hop twist), taking odd jobs to help fund their journey, and dealing with important historical issues like graffiti taggers, ninja baseball, beatboxing, zombies, hallucinogenic drugs, and eccentric foreigners. Yeah, well. . . the series never claimed to be completely accurate.
Fuu has a bright, cheerful, personality, and more often than not is very accepting of those she comes across (however, if you annoy her, don't expect to hear the end of it anytime soon). Her usually-sunny disposition definitely doesn't stop her from getting into trouble; this girl has been kidnapped more times than a Final Fantasy heroine. But in such situations, Fuu's upbeat personality peels away to reveal a will of steel and unstoppable determination; she's incredibly resourceful, and isn't afraid to ask others for help. Fuu also has the tendency to act much more wordly, knowledgeable, and attractive than she really is, in order to impress her makeshift bodyguards (it never works). And she talks. A lot. Ditto her love of food.
However, it's not all fun and games. Fuu suffers from a tragic past, complete with an absentee father and a dead mother. She seeks closure, and she'll put up with anything--even those two emotionally retarded excuses for companions--to get it.
Note: Fuu is being taken from before the series' ending.
Sample Post:
Momo-san, I've a feeling that we're not in Kansai anymore. I knew we shouldn't have let the illiterate read the map for us. . .
Ah, so maybe you all can help me! I'm looking for someone, you see, and it's really very important that I find him! Well, if you want to get more accurate, three someones. Two of them are my bodyguards, and they really tend to stand out a lot so I guess you'd notice them if you saw them, but more importantly. . . has anyone seen a samurai that smells of sunflowers? It's complicated, and I can't give you very much information, but. . . well, like I said. It's important.
And I would like to thank you all for the, ah, the warm welcome! Especially since you all look really bad, like you're sick and on your last leg or something--that's a joke by the way, hah! Because that man over there only has one leg, hahaha. . . hah? Right, well, like I said, thanks, but I'd ask that you don't get too friendly. Please? It's really nice of you to be interested, but I've got prior commitments! Washing my hair! Things like that!
. . .Oh man, I just wish it wasn't always the weirdos that were interested in me--ah, not that I can't get a nice guy, because I definitely can! Definitely! I'm just much too busy for that sort of thing. It's just that it's never the nice guys that drug me, or kidnap me, or use me as a human shield, so I never get a really good chance to talk to them, which isn't really fair. And all the other guys are too cocky, too ugly, too loud, too rude, or, in this case, falling apart.
The bad pick-up lines are sort of the same all over, though.
Not only does "Is this your arm? Because I think you lost it while running through my head all day," not make sense, but it isn't really a nice thing to tell a woman! Neither is "Wanna sit in my lap and see what falls off?" I understand that they might have limited material, looking at some of the falling-apart-y women they have here, but that's just weak! I admit that "Oh baby, you're so BRAAAAINS" was a little flattering, because people don't often tell me I look smart! I guess it just takes an observant person to pick up on that. The idiots I travel with are usually just calling me stupid and saying "Oh Fuu, be quiet!" and "Oh Fuu, stop rambling so much, no one wants to listen to you! If you don't shut up, we're going to leave!" and that's obviously preposterous, because who wouldn't want to listen to m--
--hey, where did everybody go?!
Poll Vote!
Character: Ritsu Sohma
Series: Fruits Basket
Age: 20-21 (university student)
Canon: Fruits Basket (commonly known as Furuba) is an average shoujo series. Published in a magazine with a prerequisite girly name, it features high school romance! Drama! Action! Adventure! People who are cursed to turn into animals from the Chinese Zodiac when hugged by members of the opposite sex! Wait. What?
Ritsu Sohma is the Monkey of the Zodiac, who appears to be a reserved, thoughtful woman who dresses in traditional Japanese clothing. In actuality, Ritsu is not only male, but he's an over-timid, over-apologetic, over-reacting university student who spazzes and flails at every small fault, even if it's not his. It runs in his family, and in fact, Ritsu grew up wishing that he could stop being a person his parents had to apologise for. Dressing in woman's clothing calms him down, due to the thought that women do not need to be as assertive as men, though it really can't do anything about his gullibility. He dislikes offending people, and in fact, in his quest to be as non-offensive as possible, Ritsu ends up being far more annoying than if he quieted and accepted the fact that sometimes these things. Just. Happen.
At the moment, Ritsu's idol is the beautiful, confident Aya-nii-san, also known as Ayame Sohma, with whom he wishes to take confidence lessons. Also, as a note for the app, the Jyuunishi seem to have the ability to understand or communicate with their cursed animals.
Sample Post:
Aya-nii-san, I am so sorry. I know you stress confidence and being assertive, but when the purple gorillas dropped down from the trees and began to drag me away, I was just so startled that-- I know it's not an excuse or anything! I am so, so sorry that I just couldn't tell them no when they put me in the burlap sack -- AND I'M SORRY GORILLA-SAN IT'S A VERY NICE SACK, DON'T GET ME WRONG! THE BURLAP CHAFES IN JUST THE RIGHT WAY THAT ONE WOULD EXPECT FROM FINE, UPSTANDING GORILLAS or do you prefer to be called guerillas? SUCH AS YOURSELF AND I'M SORRY, PLEASE FEEL FREE TO CONTINUE SWINGING ME AROUND!
Gorilla-san, I just don't know what you would want with a worthless human like me, especially since I'm not even fit enough to be kidnapped by appropriately coloured gorillas - N-NOT THAT PURPLE ISN'T A VERY NICE COLOUR! IT IS, AND I'M SORRY, IT LOOKS NICE ON YOU AND I'LL APOLOGISE TO ALL THE GORILLAS WHEREVER YOU'RE TAKING ME! OF COURSE, I'LL APOLOGISE TO EVERYONE ELSE AND THE WHOLE WORLD AND THE WHOLE UNIVERSE IF THEY'LL TAKE THE TIME TO LISTEN, AND FEEL FREE TO COLOUR ME PURPLE AS WELL!
. . . ah! Okay, yes. Yes, I see you've found what everyone always referred to as my weakspot. I'm sorry for asking, but could you please refrain from repeatedly poking it, Ms. Gorill-ah, Mr. Gorilla? I'm sorry. I-I'm sorry, I should have known better. It's just a small thing, I know, and you've given me this lovely laptop, and the ah, means of transportion really isn't that bad -- NO, NO IT'S WONDERFUL IT REALLY IS! P-please don't apologise to me, I should be the one groveling-- no, kissing your feet--no, I would be GLAD to do anything that you ask of me, Mr. Gorilla!
. . . except t--
ETA: Aya-nii-san, I'm sorry to ask, but could you possibly please send help? I know you can't possibly sacrifice the time, or manpower, or the resources to look, and once again, I'm sorry that I have to ask, and it's all my fault for getting in this mess in the first place, but I seem to be in the middle of what looks like a nest of purple gorillas and it seems as though even I can't get out of this one.
I'm sorry!
Poll Vote!
Character: Zorn and Thorn
Series: Final Fantasy IX
Age: late teens, early twenties?
Canon: The ninth Final Fantasy game follows the heartwarming adventures of Zidane, a thief whose merry band kidnaps the Princess Garnet. Of course, Zidane quickly falls in love with the spunky princess, who agrees a little too happily to travel with the group of lowlifes that forcibly abducted her from her home, and he works hard to save her from many things, including her insane mother the Queen, Kuja the prettyboy antagonist... and a pair of freaky twin jesters, named Zorn and Thorn, who seem to manage to annoy absolutely everyone, including the people they work for.
Zorn and Thorn are very close, inseperable twins, but they are easily told apart. Zorn wears red, casts fire magic, and talks like a normal annoying evil jester; Thorn wears blue, casts ice magic, and speaks like an annoying evil jester with brain damage. He constantly talks in inverted sentences. Like this, it is. They also have a habit of only saying a few sentences each and then repeating each other. Repeating each other, they have a habit of doing. They repeat each other a lot. Get the picture? (They also have a habit of, several times, realizing they're in a bad spot, yelling "Run away!" and twirling off.)
Despite working for the bad guys, Zorn and Thorn are arguably Not That Bad; they tell the Black Mages they're in charge of to kill and slay, but when it comes down to removing Eidolons from Eiko, they hesitate be cause doing so would kill her. They're incredibly intelligent, having built the Black Waltzes themselves. Even if they're constantly working for the wrong people, they are terribly loyal. And...
[spoilers]
Kuja reveals, after Zidane and party rescue Eiko from the Eidolon extraction, that Zorn and Thorn are "not really twins at all." The jesters, which Eiko KO'd with Terra Homing, float up into the air to some sort of pulse that sounds like a twin heartbeat... which makes a lot more sense when they merge together. It turns out that Zorn and Thorn were originally one creature! They had been split into two seperate people somehow, but they are, in fact, the same person deep down. Zorn and Thorn are Meltigemini, a two-headed jester-like monster that has a completely poisonous atmosphere.
[/spoilers]
Zidane's party eventually beats them, and they die. They are being pulled from after this point in the game. (Dark red is Zorn speaking.)
Sample Post:
You, who are you? What is this place?
Lost we are. Woke up in the swamp, we did, covered in goop. But resting on Phoenix Down pillows we were. Expecting that we were not.
Never mind! What is this place? We must find Kuja. If we live, we still have a job to do. We are…
…?! Camp Fuck You Die?? That is not a good name!
Too dangerous and forbidding that name is! Died we have already, hostile this place seems. Full of monsters, the forest was. Wandered for days we have. Strange are the items they’ve dropped.
The items they’ve dropped are strange. Some spongy food cakes with white in the middle, a box of stretchy rubber things.
A large purple monkey there is on it. Like the look in his eye I do not.
They are not food. Their taste is very… strange. Ba… ba-na-na con-doms… I wonder…
N-now is not the time to wonder! Sidetracked, we are being! Explain this all to us, you will, before we get angry! …Rather close you are getting.
You are getting rather close… It is not important. Let's kill him, shall we?
Yes, kill him we--wait.
Ba-na-na con-doms go where?
…We shall depart.
Depart we shall.
Run away!
Poll Vote!
Character: Sagan Youji
Series: Loveless
Age: 12
Canon: Youji is one half of Zero, a genetically-altered fighting team incapable of feeling 'pain.' Their creator, Professor Nagisa, created Zero to prove that the lack of pain would translate into a lack of fear when fighting. Her creations cannot feel physical pain, heat, or cold, but they are still affected by the results (i.e. hypothermia, blisters, etc...). The boys are extremely dependent on each other and trust each other implicitly.
Of the two, Youji is the louder, brasher and more reckless boy. ...He's also a bit of a smartass. Youji would be the one to insult and laugh at you and is far less inclined to make friends with others. His idea of fun? Poking a hole in your side to see what your liver looks like. Other than Nagisa, the only one Youji will listen to is his partner, Natsuo. Natsuo is also the only one he completely and utterly needs. They don't ever want to be apart, saying that if one falls, the other should follow.
Sample Post:
Bored. This place was s'posed to be fun! It even has a cool name an' everything, with "You Die" in it. There shoulda been dead people everywhere! ...real dead people, I mean. Not those smelly ones that walk around and wouldn't react when I poked them. Stupid things didn't even care where I poked them. They just kinda groaned and dribbled this nasty, sticky stuff all over me. Ew.
I've been here a whole twenty minutes and I'm bored. Boredboredbored. The birds quit coming up with new colors after ten minutes. D'ya know how hard it is to catch on'a those things and toss it at the barrier? 'Sides, the blood's still red. If it's gonna make'm rainbow colored, it should make everything rainbow colored. Doin' just the feathers is dumb. Red's real pretty, yeah, but everyone has red blood. Booooooring. If this place can make birds who talk and never shut up, it should also make blood that, like. Does stuff! Interesting stuff like makin' it blow up when you set the bodies on fire. That'd be cool!
Hey, hey, you wanna play with me? I know lotsa games~! Like, like, I think I saw somethin' moving in the trees... Whoever lands a critical hit first wins, 'kay? I've got knives! ...Don't look at me like that, 's' FUN. Y'gotta try it to know, see. I've played it lots 'n' lots and I'm real good~. We'll have lots of fun together~!
Poll Vote!
Character: Echizen Ryoma
Series: Prince of Tennis
Age: 12
Canon: Prince of Tennis: A shounen manga/anime series that
follows young and talented Echizen Ryoma. Against all precedence,
Echizen becomes a regular member of Seigaku Tennis Club at the age of
twelve, determined to defeat anyone in his way.
As he struggles in his quest to beat his father, the famed Echizen
"Samurai" Nanjiroh, he slowly cultivates friendships with his
teammates and widens the scope of his goals to something beyond
beating his father. Echizen is cocky, arrogant, and self-assured.
With the help of Captain Tezuka, and other members of the tennis club,
Echizen learns to overcome every hurdle he faces as he strives to
fashion his own style of tennis.
In the meantime, he drinks a lot of Ponta and takes more than a few
naps in the shade. He's especially fond of his cat, Karupin, and his
best friend, fellow teammate, Momoshiro. Echizen's not particularly
verbose unless his taunting his opponents, and teaching them that they
still have a ways to go.
Sample Post:
Has anyone seen a tennis ball with a face drawn on it around here? It
should be around here, somewhere. I'm Echizen Ryoma, by the way.
There's a thing playing with my ball. I really need to get back
to my match, so I need to get it back. I had better make this quick.
Huh.
It ran away. With my tennis ball.
It better hope nothing disgusting gets on my ball. I'm not going to
let him get away with this. I'm still far from done.
What is this place? There's a sign. Heh. Camp Fuck You Die.
Che, this is going to be one of those days.
Great, where did that thing go now? There're some strange sounds
coming from over there. What is going-nevermind. I'm going to pretend
I don't see that, so I don't have to get involved.
I'll just get a new ball.
This place is strange. Pity I can't stay here longer. Maybe I should
bring my dad back here someday. And leave him.
Can someone tell me how to get back to the tennis courts?
Poll Vote!