(Untitled)

[capt_liarpants]

*Ah, it's a nice day out today, isn't it? The sun is blazing, the cows are lowing, the corn is...being corn. The zombies, not the best at mobility, keep getting stuck in the fields. Marcy's waving merrily from the top of the silo. All in all, a normal day at Camp Fuck U Die: Midwest Version

Comments

[sadistsandnuts]

Is there something wrong?

[capt_liarpants]

...just stay still, okay camper?

*his big slingshot's in his hands and he's getting out ammunition hurriedly*

[sadistsandnuts]

[. . . NOT IMPRESSED]

Oh? For your sake, I hope you're not aiming that at me!

[capt_liarpants]

No, I can definitely say that I'm not going to aim at you!

*IS AIMING THE BIG SLINGSHOT AT ALICE AND PULLING THE POCKET BACK*

[sadistsandnuts]

No way! You expect me to believe that? If you know what's good for you, you won't fire.

[capt_liarpants]

*too late* TRIPLE LEAD STAAAAAAAAR!!

*three lead balls are speeding towards the thing flying right by Alice's head*

[sadistsandnuts]

[DODGING THAT SO HARD]

Hey! Now you're really in for it--

[. . . except staring at the bug thing]

[capt_liarpants]

*and the Lead Stars ker-smash the mutant insect into a gross pulp*

*lowers his slingshot and stands proudly* Another one vanquished!

[sadistsandnuts]

[ . . . ]

So that's what you were aiming for?

[capt_liarpants]

Of course, silly camper. Heroes don't hurt people, they protect them.

[sadistsandnuts]

Is that what you are! Is the hero expecting a thank you now?

[capt_liarpants]

...heroes don't need thanks, that's not why we protect people.

[sadistsandnuts]

Ooh, of course! Silly me!

What do you do if some people don't need protecting?

[capt_liarpants]

If they are able to manage themselves, then I let them. However, everyone needs assistance at some point in their lives. There's no shame in receiving a friendly heroic hand!

[sadistsandnuts]

Really? Are you listening to yourself? I can handle myself just fine, you know.

[capt_liarpants]

But if you don't see the threat, how can you handle it?