Time for some survival tl;dr.

[halfnakedsnake]

*Standing over there is a guy who looks kinda like Liquid Snake... except he has sunglasses on, his hair is tied back, and he's lacking a British accent. Hmm

Comments

[straight_as_an]

Uhm. Why would anyone of us want to visit the lake monster again?

[halfnakedsnake]

Good question. Sometimes under stressful conditions, soldiers will intentionally volunteer for the most dangerous assignments or put themselves in harm's way without the right safety requirements. In situations like that, it is best to seek therapy immediately.

[straight_as_an]

... Right. We're not soldiers either.

[halfnakedsnake]

In Alaska, the waters have many dangerous animals, and the cold can shut your body down within minutes. Avoid swimming in the lake.

[mud_on_lace]

... The lake water is radioactive, you know. I doubt boiling it would help.

[halfnakedsnake]

Radioactivity exposure can have a number of long-term adverse effects on the body by way of mutation error, including the growth of cancer cells and infertility. When entering a radioactive area, it is important to wear a hazmat suit.

[mud_on_lace]

Unfortunately, I don't think the Director provides those.

((So sorry about the delay, my little widget thingy that's supposed to tell me when I have new e-mail apparently wasn't working.))

[halfnakedsnake]

Cancer can be treated with surgery and chemotherapy.

[so_sew_me]

Um... thanks?

[halfnakedsnake]

In bright outdoor conditions, it's a good idea to wear sunscreen to prevent sunburn-causing UVB rays. However, sunscreen does not as effectively block UVA rays, which significantly increase the risk of malignant melanomas and skin cancer. Don't spend more time in the direct sun than you need to. Pale skin like yours is especially vulnerable to sun damage.

[so_sew_me]

My skin isn't pale. I tan pretty well.

...usually.

[amodelstudent]

Oh yeah right!

[halfnakedsnake]

Wear plenty of insect repellent when spending time outdoors. Mosquitoes can carry a number of diseases and parasites, which are transmitted to over 700 million people around the world every year.

[amodelstudent]

...what?

[halfnakedsnake]

Warm forested areas with stagnant water sources like this place are especially good breeding grounds for mosquitoes.

[swornmyoaths]

I'm not sure boiling would help fix that water. It glows.

[halfnakedsnake]

That may cause skin irritation. Don't go swimming without a protective suit.

[swornmyoaths]

Don't worry, I don't plan on swimming in the lake at all. The pool is good enough for me!

[halfnakedsnake]

Always make sure a lifeguard is on duty.