And now a word from the president...
So today was a wholly decent day. School was normal blahish school, with some highlights as always. But the early dismissal thing was quite refreshing. I spent a lovely afternoon at the Brown's eating stew, nachos, and ice cream and watching both Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade and episodes of family guy with Em and Amaka. Ultimately, a fully enjoyable experience. However, I have come to address you about a far graver issue. And that is the pressing matter of ex-President Clinton's upcoming surgery.
Now I have heard, from every public media possible, that one-time President Clinton will be going under the knife this week. Apparently, after his much publicized quadruple bypass surgery, no doubt the result of his passion for ribs and cajun food, there was a bit of fluid and scar tissue left behind. The procedure, known as a decortication, will remove scar tissue that has developed as a result of fluid buildup and inflammation, causing compression and collapse of the lower lobe of the left lung. Currently, he is scheduled for Thusday at 10 AM in the New York-Presbyterian Hospital/Columbia University Medical Center. The president is expected to remain in bed for 3 to 10 days, but doctors are certain that the ex-president will make a full-functioning recovery. Clinton's condition is rare for others who have undergone quadruple bypass surgery in the past. However, the procedure is supposedly relatively simple and mostly risk-free. Rest assured, the former president is in great health. According to his spokesperson, he walks around four miles every day. In fact, he has a game of golf scheduled for tommorrow. I know I do not stand alone when I wish Mr. Clinton god's speed in his recovery.
Now all this information concerning ex-President Clinton's upcoming surgery might actually be interesting, if anyone gave a damn. Honestly, he is the former president. He serves in no political capacity for this nation any longer. Right now his life involves writing his memoirs (for which he will receive millions), playing golf, and visiting other nations as an American figurehead. It's not that I'm not compassionate for those undergoing surgery. But realistically this procedure is about as remarkable as liposuction. He's got some extra Bill juice so the doctors are going to squeeze it out of him. So why would the American people need to know this? Granted, he was the president once, and some people liked him and others didn't. But he no longer is the chief executive of this nation. His health is just about as important to the American people's as Hillary Duff's. Once presidents leave the white house, they basically become the biggest tools ever. The state department sends them to other countries that we really don't care about, but we have to pretend to like just so we don't appear to be big jerks. Sure they're paid and they get to feel important. But in all honesty they really are no more important than anyone else. Thus, I'd prefer that mass media stop informing me everytime that Bill has minor surgery, or wins a round of golf, or takes a dump, or whatever. Unless of course they're going to tell me about everyone else's ailments too. Give us something interesting, or at least applicable on our news. Maybe the weather, or new legislation, or international affairs. That is Cam's rant for now.
Now I have heard, from every public media possible, that one-time President Clinton will be going under the knife this week. Apparently, after his much publicized quadruple bypass surgery, no doubt the result of his passion for ribs and cajun food, there was a bit of fluid and scar tissue left behind. The procedure, known as a decortication, will remove scar tissue that has developed as a result of fluid buildup and inflammation, causing compression and collapse of the lower lobe of the left lung. Currently, he is scheduled for Thusday at 10 AM in the New York-Presbyterian Hospital/Columbia University Medical Center. The president is expected to remain in bed for 3 to 10 days, but doctors are certain that the ex-president will make a full-functioning recovery. Clinton's condition is rare for others who have undergone quadruple bypass surgery in the past. However, the procedure is supposedly relatively simple and mostly risk-free. Rest assured, the former president is in great health. According to his spokesperson, he walks around four miles every day. In fact, he has a game of golf scheduled for tommorrow. I know I do not stand alone when I wish Mr. Clinton god's speed in his recovery.
Now all this information concerning ex-President Clinton's upcoming surgery might actually be interesting, if anyone gave a damn. Honestly, he is the former president. He serves in no political capacity for this nation any longer. Right now his life involves writing his memoirs (for which he will receive millions), playing golf, and visiting other nations as an American figurehead. It's not that I'm not compassionate for those undergoing surgery. But realistically this procedure is about as remarkable as liposuction. He's got some extra Bill juice so the doctors are going to squeeze it out of him. So why would the American people need to know this? Granted, he was the president once, and some people liked him and others didn't. But he no longer is the chief executive of this nation. His health is just about as important to the American people's as Hillary Duff's. Once presidents leave the white house, they basically become the biggest tools ever. The state department sends them to other countries that we really don't care about, but we have to pretend to like just so we don't appear to be big jerks. Sure they're paid and they get to feel important. But in all honesty they really are no more important than anyone else. Thus, I'd prefer that mass media stop informing me everytime that Bill has minor surgery, or wins a round of golf, or takes a dump, or whatever. Unless of course they're going to tell me about everyone else's ailments too. Give us something interesting, or at least applicable on our news. Maybe the weather, or new legislation, or international affairs. That is Cam's rant for now.