the man who would be boyking
Today's Novakcest post is presented in honor of glassyskies, whose birthday it was yesterday! She also wins the prize of being the first person to write a true novakcest fic. Twice. Thus I bring you the tale of Jimmy, the boy with the demon blood, exploring his Azazel-granted powers in season two, with assistance and UST from Jacob.
does jacob know about the dreams?
like nightmare, does jimmy pretend like he found out about it in a newspaper or something
and jacob being like which newspaper
and jimmy's like idk something on the internet?
jacob being like, that is not a legitimate source
and jimmy like TRUST ME JACOB
and jacob is like :hands:
max miller is the one putting jacob in danger that jimmy powers him out of
like sam in the closet etc, except jacob never knew, it's all new to him
jimmy pushing the closet away with his mind, jimmy with his mind on the gun
and he could do small things before, but never things like this
trapped in the closet and hearing the commotion upstairs and just freaking the fuck out because JACOB
and suddenly he finds it in him to power as he has never powered before
omg and of course it is his feelings for jacob that really tap into that
and jacob watching as jimmy deals with max miller, maybe a psychic tug of war over the gun
and jacob is like is this still my brother, what happened to my brother
because jacob's hunter instincts are still stronger at this point
if it's not human, should he kill it
BORN UNDER A BAD SIIIIIIGN
maybe instead of Jo, it was Jacob he pushed up against the bar
Jimmy gets really handsy when he's not himself
HANDING HIM A GUN AND BEGGING FOR DEATH, THEN SMACKING HIM AND PINNING HIM DOWN WHEN JACOB REFUSES
THE DEMON IS INSIDE HIM AND HE CAN'T DO AAAAANYTHING
HE CAN'T EVEN WARN JACOB
DEMON!JIMMY WOULD BE AMAZING FROM BOTH POVs
jimmy coming to after being possessed and the smoke on his breath like cigarettes, like that time they were fourteen and skipped school and bummed a smoke from some guy, shared it backwards and forwards until the tip was soggy
jimmy’s breath smells like that now, his breath ragged and fear making him tense, his movements stiff
wait who possesses jimmy? isn't meg already around at that point?
no she doesn’t come in until just before cold oak I thought
I mean, but could it be meg? BECAUSE ALL DEMONS ARE MEG LOLOLOL
hm yeah what if she possesses jimmy before they meet?
and then they exorcise her and then meet nicki aycox a couple months later
but when they meet jimmy doesn't know that meg was the one possessing him
OH MY GOD what if jimmy recognizes her as the demon who killed amelia and claire while she is inside him?
AND HE CAN'T DO ANYTHING
AND JACOB EXORCISES HER AND SHE IS LOST
because i mean if she's in YOUR HEAD, it's hard not to feel it
AND JIMMY WAS LIKE FUCK JACOB WE COULD HAVE KILLED HER RIGHT THEN
AND JACOB IS LIKE THAT WOULD HAVE MEANT KILLING YOU TOO
AND JIMMY IS LIKE, I DON'T CARE
like a slap in the face
and jacob's like...
because i mean when did jimmy get this unhinged? this volatile?
jimmy's control, falling apart
jimmy fraying at the seams
maybe when meg possesses jimmy she is like mmmm special child in his head
and all like "do you know, jimmy, do you know why you're like this? what those dreams mean?"
and jimmy's like no what what are you talking about
meg is like, you're one of my daddy's special kids!
we're like brothers!
jimmy is like FUCK YOU. I HAVE A BROTHER.
"you got a little bit of hell in you, jimmy. let's raise it."
and then at the end of the episode, MAYBE THAT'S WHEN THEY HAVE THE "KILL ME" CONVO:
JIMMY ALL DISTANT AND ACCEPTING
JACOB BEING ALL LIKE WTF MAN I'M NOT GONNA KILL YOU YOU CRAZY
and jacob is like no no no jimmy no look we will get tattoos it will be fine stop talking
MATCHING TATTOOS OVER THE HEART
probably after jimmy got possessed they were like, gotta make sure that NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN
is this also when they discover about devil's traps
and jimmy is like SHIT FUCKING DAMMIT I COULD HAVE PUT THOSE IN MY HOUSSSSSE
they never really did demons before this anyway so they are learning lots
what if one of jacob's mit friends was a tattoo artist who taught him how to do it
JIMMY IS ALL, WHAT IS THAT SINCE WHEN ARE YOU INTO TATTOOS
AND THEN JACOB WITH THE NEEDLE
OMG THE TENSION
JACOB ALL UP IN HIS PERSONAL SPACE AGAIN, WIPING AWAY THE BLOOD
TELLING THEMSELVES THAT THIS IS ALL FOR THE BEST ANYWAY
JIMMY KEEPING HIS EYES ON THE WALL
IGNORING EACH OTHER'S HARDONS
that split second where Jimmy hesitates and is going to ask for his to be put on the opposite side
except would that be worse, would they stand facing each other and be each other's reflection?
the needle feels hot, more like a brand.
Jimmy digs his fingers into Jacob's arm.
this will keep the evil out, they think.
WHAT ABOUT PLAYTHINGS OH GOD
WRITHING ON THE BED, YOU GOTTA KILL ME JACOB, PROMISE
I found the liquor cabinet, jacob
jimmy getting drunk on things: a theme jacob could do with less of
HUNGOVER JIMMY
jimmy never could hold his liquor
jimmy, you're drunk, just…
sleep it off, okay?
and jimmy just grabs jacob's faaaace
DRUNK JIMMY FLOPPING TO THE BED AFTER JACOB SHOVES HIM ASIDE
jacob off to the side just trying to get his shit together
waiting for his boner to go down
calm the fuck down, he says to himself
it's fine, it'll be fine, we can figure this out, pull yourself together
he's drunk, jacob tells himself you can't just let him touch you like-
he's drunk. stop.
when jimmy starts having the dreams and freaking out, jacob thinks they're grief-induced
"no it's real"
jimmy having a vision and jacob being like okay, now try to stay calm
jacob takes his pulse, checks jimmy's eyes
touching jimmy's neck, his wrists, getting all up in his space
poor jimmy watching people dieeeeeee
i want jacob coming up with scientific explanations for jimmy's psychic flashes
he is a scientist he wants to know what these are and what they can do
so he encourages jimmy to pursue his powers
is jacob, a little bit, the ruby here
if meg was like lol ur evil while she possessed jimmy, jimmy would freak out, right?
so jacob would have a lot of persuading to do before powers training
but jimmy you can't hold a gun if you don't know how to shoot it, that's practically the first lesson, come on this is for science
you have to know your enemy
because that's always been his method, you analyze it and see its component parts
idk maybe jacob's draw to the powers initially is more muted
fear mixed in with the curiosity
so it takes a few explosions before he's like okay fuck that we gotta get you trained up
maybe he just wants to find a way to stop the nightmares
small things, relative to what they can actually do
jacob studying it as a way to get to the heart of jimmy, but it's also what depersonalizes jimmy in his mind, not that jacob's aware of it.
it freaks jimmy out sometimes. like jacob is using a different part of his brain on jimmy
not the part jimmy's used to
this isn't jacob with jimmy, this is jacob with a microscope
and it unsettles jimmy because he is used to the former
jimmy has never really experienced science jacob!
science is what jacob did when jimmy wasn't there
jimmy doesn't like to see mit!jacob, which is basically what this is
come back, you weren't supposed to leave me for science again
science is jacob’s jess, his amelia
the OTHER WOMAN
DO YOUR BAR GRAPHS EVER GIVE YOU BONERS, JACOB
...no wait don't answer that
jacob is kind of predatory and greedy right now
jacob simultaneously detaching and becoming even more obsessive
jimmy as object of study an object of study, of desire, verboten.
jacob puts jimmy on a pedestal.
and then seeing jimmy consumed by revenge, more than anything else that starts to poke jimmy off the pedestal
jimmy meanwhile still grieving
DOES JACOB GET MAYBE A LITTLE POWER MAD
jimmy supple in his hands as never before
JIMMY LISTENING TO HIM DOING AS HE SAYS
oh fffffffffff are there very slight hints of hell!jacob
DIET HELL!JACOB
how do things work
this is why he's a great torturer, because he doesn't really care ABOUT torture
the torture is incidental to taking them apart, because he is CURIOUS
in some part of him he wants to take jimmy apart to find out how he works
jimmy, the perpetual mystery to him
i think jacob must know to some extent that there is something manipulative in his experiments
probably one of those things he doesn't wanna think about
i can also see him being like, as time goes on, he really does get wrapped up in the numbers and experiments, truly outside of jimmy himself
the dissociation thing
maybe this is what leads to jimmy snapping. i'm not just a fucking line graph, jacob.
jacob is not giving the affirmation jimmy needs
does jacob's scientific objectification scar jimmy a little bit
~THIS IS ALL YOU'RE GOOD FOR~
and jimmy’s own issues with the powers, the demon blood is him losing control of his very body
his mind has always had its dark corners but now his body does strange things without him meaning to
good thing he never went into the ministry then. laughing bitterly, what good would that have been
but maybe if he can control this he can control other things
so at first jimmy is like I AM EVIL AND BAD and jacob is like oooooh shiny
but then jacob sort of prods jimmy into self-exploration and jimmy is surprised by how good it feels
MASTURBATION METAPHOR
omg jimmy sending him things telepathically
IS IT STRONGER BECAUSE THEY ARE TWIIIINS
how often does jimmy do this? is this a power they practice? with the experiments?
IT'S VERY START STOP AT FIRST
COME ON JIMMY
AND OF COURSE THE FIRST THING HE TRANSMITS IS JUST GUT FEELING
WHICH IS JACOB
and idk if even jimmy knows what he's transmitting
just shaking and sweating and asking, "did it work? did you see?"
and jacob is like, yeah yeah try again
BECAUSE HE WANTS TO KNOW
HE WANTS TO SEE MORE
HE WANTS TO CONFIRM
DOES HE GET EMOTIONAL TRANSFER
CAN JACOB FEEL JIMMY'S REPRESSED WANT
I THINK IT KIND OF BLOWS HIM AWAY
LIKE WASN’T IT JIMMY WHO HAS ALWAYS PUSHED HIM AWAY
BUT THERE IS THIS
THERE IS STILL THIS
also frustrates him more, because jesus jimmy how can you ignore that
AND IT LIGHTS SOME ANGRY DESPERATE FUTILE HOPE IN HIM
AND HE IS LIKE
HE JUST WANTS MORE AND HE IS SNEAKY CREEPY ABOUT IT
because i mean also jimmy is still grieving and other issues, so jacob is not really gonna tackle this head on
he taught himself not to
that didn't work in the past so he's mining through jimmy's head for incest
passive aggressive seduction
it is also like a drug
jacob gets to liking the emotional transference
AND THEN JIMMY STARTS TO NOTICE LIKE, what are you seeing
and jacob lies some more and jimmy knows he's lying
maybe part of it is that jimmy is getting better at self-control
so he's like, sending less incestuous thoughts, which makes jacob even more manipulative
trying to get the desired results
biasing the results
WHICH IS REALLY UNSCIENTIFIC, JACOB
but jimmy trumps science
jimmy is always more than science more than anything
OH MY GOD MAYBE THE VERY FIRST TIME HE ACCIDENTALLY SHOVES SOME OF HIS GRIEF ONTO JACOB
AND IS THEN LIKE JAKE WHY ARE YOU CRYING
DOES JACOB HAVE TO EXCUSE HIMSELF
DOES HE APOLOGIZE PROFUSELY TO JIMMY
ARE THERE MORE COMFORT HUGS
AND IT IS LIKE THE MOST GEN OF HUGS
BUT PERHAPS ONE OF THE DEEPEST
BECAUSE LOSS, MOURNING, TRAPPEDNESS
RETURN, RECONCILIATION
because jacob isn't very good at empathy
but now he gets it
maybe this also contributes to him holding himself back when things turn porny
I mean, he still doesn't know what to say, but his hug is no longer a hesitant fumbling thing
this time he may cry nearly as much as jimmy
grief gives him the confidence of necessity
needing comfort himself makes it easier to give it
can he read jacob's thoughts too?
maybe it takes jimmy all season to master it though, he's not telepathic per se
he hasn't sharpened it that far
that's one he's scared of
for the longest time it's just flashes of emotion and instinct still
does he sometimes use this on hunts, high stress brings out his powers to protect jacob
maybe that's how jacob discovers the powers!
"what the fuck was that"
jimmy like I didn't do it on purpose!
jacob already knows about the dreams but this is something else
i think jimmy is more afraid than jacob is.
maybe he doesn't want to look inside jacob's mind
he's still to scared of himself and what he'll do
i'm not sure if jacob is scared, can he ever really be scared of jimmy?
if jacob's gonna be scared of jimmy, i think it would be more likely in s4
yeah, s2 jimmy is fighting him trying to stay a good person his morals aren't that warped yet
and he also doesn't want to get what he wants
he thinks being good, doing your duty, doing god's work, means that you shouldn't get whatever you want
that line between selflessness and self-righteous martyr complex
and jimmy wants to be special, he's kind of self-centered and tunnel vision-y in canon
in that once Castiel chose him, he drops Claire and Amelia like a hot potato
like he makes sure they're okay and he does love them...
though I wonder how much of his pursuit of Cas is out of selfless devotion to his faith, or because he really thinks he's that goddamn special.
he kind of lives in his own little world.
I liked what you said about jimmy wanting to be special
he never thought he was gonna be THIS special
and that's definitely a twins thing, you know, wanting something that makes you unique, and here is this strange power suddenly
i think we could use more twin angst
similarities and differences
which do they want, to be the same or not
and so maybe powers-wise, jimmy actually welcomes it
the powers make me so super special
and jacob is like guuuurl
IS JIMMY ALREADY HOOKED
the glimmers of addiction!
maybe in s2-s3 powers training replaces cigs as his drug of choice, and then demon blood
it is a combo of replacing smokes and forming a new addiction
in times of high stress, when he WOULD be out smoking, instead he picks up jacob's duffel with his mind and throws it against the wall
and it's the same rush
does jacob encourage him to focus on powers in lieu of cigs
he probably does
jimmy is at once getting more addicted and switching addictions
a deeper addiction than the addiction before
stop twitching, jimmy
and it's why meg was so easily, like... hey drink my blood, it'll boost up your powers
and jimmy was like AWESOME
I LOVE POWERS
NOSEBLEED JIMMY IS FOREVER RELEVANT
beating himself up for taking it too far, wanting to take it further
omg i am so down with them pushing the experiments too far for s2
WHAT IF JIMMY DOES THAT FOR JACOB?
COME ON JIMMY, JUST A LITTLE MORE
and jimmy's brain is like JFKLSJFKLDJFLJFD
bleeding from the nose, sure! from the ears! from the eyes!
and jacob is like, come on, jimmy, just try it one more time
this is a thing that jimmy submits to jacob for
because jacob knows where he's at with experiments and science
he knows how to science
"you pushed a closet, jimmy, can you do it again, it's not scientifically viable unless the results can be repeated"
okay, jimmy, this is 5 grams, raise it a foot off the table. now two feet. now with ten grams.
gives all sorts of explanation why this is the best course of action
and jimmy's like yes, you're right, okay
jacob's tests and jimmy submitting to them
what is it about jimmy's body, y'know
and then the possibility of retribution, jimmy exploring jacob's body through senses he didn't know he had
jimmy is tiiiiired and jacob is like "hold on, we're not done"
jimmy starting to be shaky on his feet but he doesn't want to let jacob down
you did so good that time, jimmy!
but i bet there is a scene where jimmy gets fed up and lashes out
SLAMS JACOB AGAINST THE WALL WITH HIS MIND
and then y’know
more Things They Don’t Talk About
accidents at first
jimmy would say they were all accidents
training going too far
jimmy's self-control is haywire
How can he get that look on jacob's face, that sound, without actually touching him
how far do they ever get in the s1/2 of almosts?
i mean, even without physical touching, does jimmy get jacob off with powers like, at least once?
I think jacob probably tried to get jimmy to fight him telekinetically, and that's what started it
like "come on man see if you can throw me across the room"
"you did it with a wardrobe"
and suddenly he feels this sort of pressure all over his body
but it's jimmy's gasp more than anything that makes him stumble
gasping with effort, yeah, but in pushing at jacob, it is like touching jacob
and jimmy is like ohhhh shit
yeah, and then it's like a confluence of other incidents, accidents, where jimmy feels jacob up
where he just slips or like, he instinctively is drawn to jacob
jacob as jimmy's center of gravity
the earth's core
at first jacob jumps, sort of twitchy, but then he pretends not to feel it in hopes that jimmy will take it farther
or maybe he tries to recreate circumstances where jimmy ends up feeling him up
ahaha I imagine the telekinesis is mostly just excruciatingly frustrating
because like once you have given someone an orgasm it's difficult to deny that
but just TOUCHING him, it's not his fault jacob gets off on it
he's not using his body so it doesn't count
or so he tells himself he tells himself
and he readily believes it because he aaaaaches for jacob
so jimmy doesn't mean to get jacob off, but jacob gets off anyway?
jimmy makes himself stop every time, just before he crosses that line
jacob is like FOR FUCK'S SAKE
WHY EVEN DO THIS THEN JIMMY
I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING
jimmy's way of reminding jacob that he's still human, not just charts and figures
JIMMY IS THE BIGGEST COCKTEASE
jimmy is probably power tripping a little as well, in revenge for jacob's
this is almost passive aggressive, jimmy fighting back like this
it's like jacob dissociated the powers from his brother, like they're this thing that jimmy and jacob are doing together
jacob thinks he is in charge because he knows what the numbers mean
right. sure, jacob. sure you are in charge.
and jimmy must remind him
with boners
he fights back like this and jacob doesn't necessarily stop him
JACOB LETS IT HAPPEN AND PRETENDS HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
JIMMY, USING THE ONLY SHORTCUT HE KNOWS
JIMMY PRETENDING IT WAS AN ACCIDENT
THAT HE'S ALLOWED
OH GOD JIMMY WANTS IT SO MUCH
IT DOESN'T COUNT UNLESS THEY TOUCH
JIMMY JACKING OFF TO JACOB AND HATING HIMSELF
jacob doesn't call him on it because he doesn't want it to stop
jacob remembers that under all the analytical data, this thing that he is studying is very real
and very giving him a boner
and it's sort of like, jimmy allows himself this release outlet as long as no one acknowledges it directly, and jacob understands that
THE UNSPOKEN THING
jacob doesn't confront him because better this than nothing
A ~mutual understanding~?!
as soon as the sex things start the power moves back to jimmy's hands
he has always set the terms on how far they are allowed to go with each other
ALWAYS ABOUT CONTROL, JIMMY
and jacob, always desperate for what he can get.
In conclusion, forever angst. HAPPY BIRTHDAY glassyskies
(Also posted on Dreamwidth.)
does jacob know about the dreams?
like nightmare, does jimmy pretend like he found out about it in a newspaper or something
and jacob being like which newspaper
and jimmy's like idk something on the internet?
jacob being like, that is not a legitimate source
and jimmy like TRUST ME JACOB
and jacob is like :hands:
max miller is the one putting jacob in danger that jimmy powers him out of
like sam in the closet etc, except jacob never knew, it's all new to him
jimmy pushing the closet away with his mind, jimmy with his mind on the gun
and he could do small things before, but never things like this
trapped in the closet and hearing the commotion upstairs and just freaking the fuck out because JACOB
and suddenly he finds it in him to power as he has never powered before
omg and of course it is his feelings for jacob that really tap into that
and jacob watching as jimmy deals with max miller, maybe a psychic tug of war over the gun
and jacob is like is this still my brother, what happened to my brother
because jacob's hunter instincts are still stronger at this point
if it's not human, should he kill it
BORN UNDER A BAD SIIIIIIGN
maybe instead of Jo, it was Jacob he pushed up against the bar
Jimmy gets really handsy when he's not himself
HANDING HIM A GUN AND BEGGING FOR DEATH, THEN SMACKING HIM AND PINNING HIM DOWN WHEN JACOB REFUSES
THE DEMON IS INSIDE HIM AND HE CAN'T DO AAAAANYTHING
HE CAN'T EVEN WARN JACOB
DEMON!JIMMY WOULD BE AMAZING FROM BOTH POVs
jimmy coming to after being possessed and the smoke on his breath like cigarettes, like that time they were fourteen and skipped school and bummed a smoke from some guy, shared it backwards and forwards until the tip was soggy
jimmy’s breath smells like that now, his breath ragged and fear making him tense, his movements stiff
wait who possesses jimmy? isn't meg already around at that point?
no she doesn’t come in until just before cold oak I thought
I mean, but could it be meg? BECAUSE ALL DEMONS ARE MEG LOLOLOL
hm yeah what if she possesses jimmy before they meet?
and then they exorcise her and then meet nicki aycox a couple months later
but when they meet jimmy doesn't know that meg was the one possessing him
OH MY GOD what if jimmy recognizes her as the demon who killed amelia and claire while she is inside him?
AND HE CAN'T DO ANYTHING
AND JACOB EXORCISES HER AND SHE IS LOST
because i mean if she's in YOUR HEAD, it's hard not to feel it
AND JIMMY WAS LIKE FUCK JACOB WE COULD HAVE KILLED HER RIGHT THEN
AND JACOB IS LIKE THAT WOULD HAVE MEANT KILLING YOU TOO
AND JIMMY IS LIKE, I DON'T CARE
like a slap in the face
and jacob's like...
because i mean when did jimmy get this unhinged? this volatile?
jimmy's control, falling apart
jimmy fraying at the seams
maybe when meg possesses jimmy she is like mmmm special child in his head
and all like "do you know, jimmy, do you know why you're like this? what those dreams mean?"
and jimmy's like no what what are you talking about
meg is like, you're one of my daddy's special kids!
we're like brothers!
jimmy is like FUCK YOU. I HAVE A BROTHER.
"you got a little bit of hell in you, jimmy. let's raise it."
and then at the end of the episode, MAYBE THAT'S WHEN THEY HAVE THE "KILL ME" CONVO:
JIMMY ALL DISTANT AND ACCEPTING
JACOB BEING ALL LIKE WTF MAN I'M NOT GONNA KILL YOU YOU CRAZY
and jacob is like no no no jimmy no look we will get tattoos it will be fine stop talking
MATCHING TATTOOS OVER THE HEART
probably after jimmy got possessed they were like, gotta make sure that NEVER HAPPENS AGAIN
is this also when they discover about devil's traps
and jimmy is like SHIT FUCKING DAMMIT I COULD HAVE PUT THOSE IN MY HOUSSSSSE
they never really did demons before this anyway so they are learning lots
what if one of jacob's mit friends was a tattoo artist who taught him how to do it
JIMMY IS ALL, WHAT IS THAT SINCE WHEN ARE YOU INTO TATTOOS
AND THEN JACOB WITH THE NEEDLE
OMG THE TENSION
JACOB ALL UP IN HIS PERSONAL SPACE AGAIN, WIPING AWAY THE BLOOD
TELLING THEMSELVES THAT THIS IS ALL FOR THE BEST ANYWAY
JIMMY KEEPING HIS EYES ON THE WALL
IGNORING EACH OTHER'S HARDONS
that split second where Jimmy hesitates and is going to ask for his to be put on the opposite side
except would that be worse, would they stand facing each other and be each other's reflection?
the needle feels hot, more like a brand.
Jimmy digs his fingers into Jacob's arm.
this will keep the evil out, they think.
WHAT ABOUT PLAYTHINGS OH GOD
WRITHING ON THE BED, YOU GOTTA KILL ME JACOB, PROMISE
I found the liquor cabinet, jacob
jimmy getting drunk on things: a theme jacob could do with less of
HUNGOVER JIMMY
jimmy never could hold his liquor
jimmy, you're drunk, just…
sleep it off, okay?
and jimmy just grabs jacob's faaaace
DRUNK JIMMY FLOPPING TO THE BED AFTER JACOB SHOVES HIM ASIDE
jacob off to the side just trying to get his shit together
waiting for his boner to go down
calm the fuck down, he says to himself
it's fine, it'll be fine, we can figure this out, pull yourself together
he's drunk, jacob tells himself you can't just let him touch you like-
he's drunk. stop.
when jimmy starts having the dreams and freaking out, jacob thinks they're grief-induced
"no it's real"
jimmy having a vision and jacob being like okay, now try to stay calm
jacob takes his pulse, checks jimmy's eyes
touching jimmy's neck, his wrists, getting all up in his space
poor jimmy watching people dieeeeeee
i want jacob coming up with scientific explanations for jimmy's psychic flashes
he is a scientist he wants to know what these are and what they can do
so he encourages jimmy to pursue his powers
is jacob, a little bit, the ruby here
if meg was like lol ur evil while she possessed jimmy, jimmy would freak out, right?
so jacob would have a lot of persuading to do before powers training
but jimmy you can't hold a gun if you don't know how to shoot it, that's practically the first lesson, come on this is for science
you have to know your enemy
because that's always been his method, you analyze it and see its component parts
idk maybe jacob's draw to the powers initially is more muted
fear mixed in with the curiosity
so it takes a few explosions before he's like okay fuck that we gotta get you trained up
maybe he just wants to find a way to stop the nightmares
small things, relative to what they can actually do
jacob studying it as a way to get to the heart of jimmy, but it's also what depersonalizes jimmy in his mind, not that jacob's aware of it.
it freaks jimmy out sometimes. like jacob is using a different part of his brain on jimmy
not the part jimmy's used to
this isn't jacob with jimmy, this is jacob with a microscope
and it unsettles jimmy because he is used to the former
jimmy has never really experienced science jacob!
science is what jacob did when jimmy wasn't there
jimmy doesn't like to see mit!jacob, which is basically what this is
come back, you weren't supposed to leave me for science again
science is jacob’s jess, his amelia
the OTHER WOMAN
DO YOUR BAR GRAPHS EVER GIVE YOU BONERS, JACOB
...no wait don't answer that
jacob is kind of predatory and greedy right now
jacob simultaneously detaching and becoming even more obsessive
jimmy as object of study an object of study, of desire, verboten.
jacob puts jimmy on a pedestal.
and then seeing jimmy consumed by revenge, more than anything else that starts to poke jimmy off the pedestal
jimmy meanwhile still grieving
DOES JACOB GET MAYBE A LITTLE POWER MAD
jimmy supple in his hands as never before
JIMMY LISTENING TO HIM DOING AS HE SAYS
oh fffffffffff are there very slight hints of hell!jacob
DIET HELL!JACOB
how do things work
this is why he's a great torturer, because he doesn't really care ABOUT torture
the torture is incidental to taking them apart, because he is CURIOUS
in some part of him he wants to take jimmy apart to find out how he works
jimmy, the perpetual mystery to him
i think jacob must know to some extent that there is something manipulative in his experiments
probably one of those things he doesn't wanna think about
i can also see him being like, as time goes on, he really does get wrapped up in the numbers and experiments, truly outside of jimmy himself
the dissociation thing
maybe this is what leads to jimmy snapping. i'm not just a fucking line graph, jacob.
jacob is not giving the affirmation jimmy needs
does jacob's scientific objectification scar jimmy a little bit
~THIS IS ALL YOU'RE GOOD FOR~
and jimmy’s own issues with the powers, the demon blood is him losing control of his very body
his mind has always had its dark corners but now his body does strange things without him meaning to
good thing he never went into the ministry then. laughing bitterly, what good would that have been
but maybe if he can control this he can control other things
so at first jimmy is like I AM EVIL AND BAD and jacob is like oooooh shiny
but then jacob sort of prods jimmy into self-exploration and jimmy is surprised by how good it feels
MASTURBATION METAPHOR
omg jimmy sending him things telepathically
IS IT STRONGER BECAUSE THEY ARE TWIIIINS
how often does jimmy do this? is this a power they practice? with the experiments?
IT'S VERY START STOP AT FIRST
COME ON JIMMY
AND OF COURSE THE FIRST THING HE TRANSMITS IS JUST GUT FEELING
WHICH IS JACOB
and idk if even jimmy knows what he's transmitting
just shaking and sweating and asking, "did it work? did you see?"
and jacob is like, yeah yeah try again
BECAUSE HE WANTS TO KNOW
HE WANTS TO SEE MORE
HE WANTS TO CONFIRM
DOES HE GET EMOTIONAL TRANSFER
CAN JACOB FEEL JIMMY'S REPRESSED WANT
I THINK IT KIND OF BLOWS HIM AWAY
LIKE WASN’T IT JIMMY WHO HAS ALWAYS PUSHED HIM AWAY
BUT THERE IS THIS
THERE IS STILL THIS
also frustrates him more, because jesus jimmy how can you ignore that
AND IT LIGHTS SOME ANGRY DESPERATE FUTILE HOPE IN HIM
AND HE IS LIKE
HE JUST WANTS MORE AND HE IS SNEAKY CREEPY ABOUT IT
because i mean also jimmy is still grieving and other issues, so jacob is not really gonna tackle this head on
he taught himself not to
that didn't work in the past so he's mining through jimmy's head for incest
passive aggressive seduction
it is also like a drug
jacob gets to liking the emotional transference
AND THEN JIMMY STARTS TO NOTICE LIKE, what are you seeing
and jacob lies some more and jimmy knows he's lying
maybe part of it is that jimmy is getting better at self-control
so he's like, sending less incestuous thoughts, which makes jacob even more manipulative
trying to get the desired results
biasing the results
WHICH IS REALLY UNSCIENTIFIC, JACOB
but jimmy trumps science
jimmy is always more than science more than anything
OH MY GOD MAYBE THE VERY FIRST TIME HE ACCIDENTALLY SHOVES SOME OF HIS GRIEF ONTO JACOB
AND IS THEN LIKE JAKE WHY ARE YOU CRYING
DOES JACOB HAVE TO EXCUSE HIMSELF
DOES HE APOLOGIZE PROFUSELY TO JIMMY
ARE THERE MORE COMFORT HUGS
AND IT IS LIKE THE MOST GEN OF HUGS
BUT PERHAPS ONE OF THE DEEPEST
BECAUSE LOSS, MOURNING, TRAPPEDNESS
RETURN, RECONCILIATION
because jacob isn't very good at empathy
but now he gets it
maybe this also contributes to him holding himself back when things turn porny
I mean, he still doesn't know what to say, but his hug is no longer a hesitant fumbling thing
this time he may cry nearly as much as jimmy
grief gives him the confidence of necessity
needing comfort himself makes it easier to give it
can he read jacob's thoughts too?
maybe it takes jimmy all season to master it though, he's not telepathic per se
he hasn't sharpened it that far
that's one he's scared of
for the longest time it's just flashes of emotion and instinct still
does he sometimes use this on hunts, high stress brings out his powers to protect jacob
maybe that's how jacob discovers the powers!
"what the fuck was that"
jimmy like I didn't do it on purpose!
jacob already knows about the dreams but this is something else
i think jimmy is more afraid than jacob is.
maybe he doesn't want to look inside jacob's mind
he's still to scared of himself and what he'll do
i'm not sure if jacob is scared, can he ever really be scared of jimmy?
if jacob's gonna be scared of jimmy, i think it would be more likely in s4
yeah, s2 jimmy is fighting him trying to stay a good person his morals aren't that warped yet
and he also doesn't want to get what he wants
he thinks being good, doing your duty, doing god's work, means that you shouldn't get whatever you want
that line between selflessness and self-righteous martyr complex
and jimmy wants to be special, he's kind of self-centered and tunnel vision-y in canon
in that once Castiel chose him, he drops Claire and Amelia like a hot potato
like he makes sure they're okay and he does love them...
though I wonder how much of his pursuit of Cas is out of selfless devotion to his faith, or because he really thinks he's that goddamn special.
he kind of lives in his own little world.
I liked what you said about jimmy wanting to be special
he never thought he was gonna be THIS special
and that's definitely a twins thing, you know, wanting something that makes you unique, and here is this strange power suddenly
i think we could use more twin angst
similarities and differences
which do they want, to be the same or not
and so maybe powers-wise, jimmy actually welcomes it
the powers make me so super special
and jacob is like guuuurl
IS JIMMY ALREADY HOOKED
the glimmers of addiction!
maybe in s2-s3 powers training replaces cigs as his drug of choice, and then demon blood
it is a combo of replacing smokes and forming a new addiction
in times of high stress, when he WOULD be out smoking, instead he picks up jacob's duffel with his mind and throws it against the wall
and it's the same rush
does jacob encourage him to focus on powers in lieu of cigs
he probably does
jimmy is at once getting more addicted and switching addictions
a deeper addiction than the addiction before
stop twitching, jimmy
and it's why meg was so easily, like... hey drink my blood, it'll boost up your powers
and jimmy was like AWESOME
I LOVE POWERS
NOSEBLEED JIMMY IS FOREVER RELEVANT
beating himself up for taking it too far, wanting to take it further
omg i am so down with them pushing the experiments too far for s2
WHAT IF JIMMY DOES THAT FOR JACOB?
COME ON JIMMY, JUST A LITTLE MORE
and jimmy's brain is like JFKLSJFKLDJFLJFD
bleeding from the nose, sure! from the ears! from the eyes!
and jacob is like, come on, jimmy, just try it one more time
this is a thing that jimmy submits to jacob for
because jacob knows where he's at with experiments and science
he knows how to science
"you pushed a closet, jimmy, can you do it again, it's not scientifically viable unless the results can be repeated"
okay, jimmy, this is 5 grams, raise it a foot off the table. now two feet. now with ten grams.
gives all sorts of explanation why this is the best course of action
and jimmy's like yes, you're right, okay
jacob's tests and jimmy submitting to them
what is it about jimmy's body, y'know
and then the possibility of retribution, jimmy exploring jacob's body through senses he didn't know he had
jimmy is tiiiiired and jacob is like "hold on, we're not done"
jimmy starting to be shaky on his feet but he doesn't want to let jacob down
you did so good that time, jimmy!
but i bet there is a scene where jimmy gets fed up and lashes out
SLAMS JACOB AGAINST THE WALL WITH HIS MIND
and then y’know
more Things They Don’t Talk About
accidents at first
jimmy would say they were all accidents
training going too far
jimmy's self-control is haywire
How can he get that look on jacob's face, that sound, without actually touching him
how far do they ever get in the s1/2 of almosts?
i mean, even without physical touching, does jimmy get jacob off with powers like, at least once?
I think jacob probably tried to get jimmy to fight him telekinetically, and that's what started it
like "come on man see if you can throw me across the room"
"you did it with a wardrobe"
and suddenly he feels this sort of pressure all over his body
but it's jimmy's gasp more than anything that makes him stumble
gasping with effort, yeah, but in pushing at jacob, it is like touching jacob
and jimmy is like ohhhh shit
yeah, and then it's like a confluence of other incidents, accidents, where jimmy feels jacob up
where he just slips or like, he instinctively is drawn to jacob
jacob as jimmy's center of gravity
the earth's core
at first jacob jumps, sort of twitchy, but then he pretends not to feel it in hopes that jimmy will take it farther
or maybe he tries to recreate circumstances where jimmy ends up feeling him up
ahaha I imagine the telekinesis is mostly just excruciatingly frustrating
because like once you have given someone an orgasm it's difficult to deny that
but just TOUCHING him, it's not his fault jacob gets off on it
he's not using his body so it doesn't count
or so he tells himself he tells himself
and he readily believes it because he aaaaaches for jacob
so jimmy doesn't mean to get jacob off, but jacob gets off anyway?
jimmy makes himself stop every time, just before he crosses that line
jacob is like FOR FUCK'S SAKE
WHY EVEN DO THIS THEN JIMMY
I KNOW WHAT YOU’RE DOING
jimmy's way of reminding jacob that he's still human, not just charts and figures
JIMMY IS THE BIGGEST COCKTEASE
jimmy is probably power tripping a little as well, in revenge for jacob's
this is almost passive aggressive, jimmy fighting back like this
it's like jacob dissociated the powers from his brother, like they're this thing that jimmy and jacob are doing together
jacob thinks he is in charge because he knows what the numbers mean
right. sure, jacob. sure you are in charge.
and jimmy must remind him
with boners
he fights back like this and jacob doesn't necessarily stop him
JACOB LETS IT HAPPEN AND PRETENDS HE DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
JIMMY, USING THE ONLY SHORTCUT HE KNOWS
JIMMY PRETENDING IT WAS AN ACCIDENT
THAT HE'S ALLOWED
OH GOD JIMMY WANTS IT SO MUCH
IT DOESN'T COUNT UNLESS THEY TOUCH
JIMMY JACKING OFF TO JACOB AND HATING HIMSELF
jacob doesn't call him on it because he doesn't want it to stop
jacob remembers that under all the analytical data, this thing that he is studying is very real
and very giving him a boner
and it's sort of like, jimmy allows himself this release outlet as long as no one acknowledges it directly, and jacob understands that
THE UNSPOKEN THING
jacob doesn't confront him because better this than nothing
A ~mutual understanding~?!
as soon as the sex things start the power moves back to jimmy's hands
he has always set the terms on how far they are allowed to go with each other
ALWAYS ABOUT CONTROL, JIMMY
and jacob, always desperate for what he can get.
In conclusion, forever angst. HAPPY BIRTHDAY glassyskies
(Also posted on Dreamwidth.)