(no subject)
Letting other people read my writing is stressful. I desperately want their opinions, but only if they're good (yes, I know, that's not exaclty useful. But it's still true). And I'm not talking about the short stories I post on here. Those I put zero thought into, as I only have half an hour to bust out a story, and zero editing gets done. I'm talking about the tens of thousands of words I pour into other stories. I almost never ask other people to read my stuff, because if they don't read it they can't tell me it sucks. The worst kind of person is the one who asks to read my stuff and then never comments on it. Did you read it? If not, why did you ask for it? If so, what, do you think you live in a vacuum? GIVE ME FEEDBACK (mostly just tell me what made you laugh).
I recently wrote a story. One person read it and gave tons of positive feedback, telling me everything she liked, and helping fix a few things I got wrong (what even is weightlifting? What do you mean different muscles get used on different days? wHAT IS CHEST DAY?) and generally encouraging me to finish the dang thing. I was immensely proud of it once completed, much of which I attribute to this person because her encouragement is what spurred me on to finish it in the first place.
A couple months later, I had a second person read it. She left no comments except for when she announced she'd finished it: "I loved it until the last chapter. The ending is rushed and I hate the epilogue." The semi-rational part of me figures I should listen to the feedback I ask for. The other semi-rational part of me demands such feedback to be given in a compliment sandwich: "This bit is great. Here's the thing you need to fix. This bit is great." The neruotic part of me panicked and figured I'd written absolute garbage. Still, just to make sure, I went back and read the last fourth. My conclusion? Reader 2 is smoking something, because that story is brilliant and hilarious, ended well, and the epilogue is the sort of epilogue I hunger for. Reader 1 agreed with me when we discussed it, so in the end I changed absolutely nothing because it's hard to mess with perfection. :D
I've got a third person reading it at the moment, and every new chapter she looks at causes my neurotic little freak to rear her ugly head and panic because what if this is the chapter she hates? She has yet to hate it, but you never know. Still, I'm always hesitant to read her comments, which is ridiculous, because she has yet to say anything mean.
I don't remember where I saw/heard it (probably on tumblr), but someone said that when giving feedback, never be the kind of reviewer who makes the creator want to stop creating. That had a profound effect on how I respond to other people's writing. At the end of any project, I want the writer to feel pleased and inspired to create something new. I never want to be the reason they want to crawl in a hole and bury themselves in the mud. There are enough garbage people in the world who will make it their aim to be that kind of person, so I don't need to jump on that bandwagon. I'm trying to practice Thumper's Law of Civility.
That doesn't mean I can never give corrective feedback. I'm a teacher; I have an educational duty to give corrective feedback. But there is a huge difference between "this doesn't make sense," "I'm not seeing the connection," "I don't understand" and "this is stupid," "you did this wrong," "boo you suck."
Reader 2, after some prompting from me, came back and offered suggestions on how I could fix what she deemed to be problems. (For the record, I did take her seriously. One of her concerns I had addressed in a previous chapter, and quite well, if I do say so myself (obviously I do; I just did) and the other was a matter of taste. She doesn't like the particular style of epilogue I used, which is a fair criticism, but I do like it, and don't see a need to change). If you're going to offer corrective feedback, it should come with suggestions for improvement. Just to mark something as bad and leave it hanging tells me, the writer, that you, the reader, don't know what you're talking about. I ignore that kind of feedback. But "I dislike/don't agree with this, here's a possible suggestion to improve it" is something I will consider, whether ultimately I decide to decline or accept your suggestion.
I've got another story in the works that a friend read. I knew there was something wrong with it; I was just too close to the words to figure out the problem. She pointed out several things I could work on, most of which she's right about. But here's the kicker: I hate editing. It's the pits. My response is to go write something new instead of fixing the old.
...Yeah. I know. I'll figure it out eventually.
Anyway, none of this is to say you should ask for any of my stories. I will be highly embarrassed if you do and have to figure out how to pretend like I didn't hear the request. Or I'll give you one of my past NaNoWriMos. I'm awfully fond of the Aunistee story, and not very embarrassed about it, so it's safe to hand out. Hot Marketing Boy's also a safe bet.
People have asked me over the years if I want to write a book, and the honest answer is I don't know, leaning towards the no side. I don't know if I can handle my writing being among the mass public. Though if I ever did write one, it would definitely be a romance, which guarantees almost no one in my family would read it. That saves me from their judgment, but on the other hand, they're missing out, because dang, I'm hilarious.
(Ask me sometime at 2am when I'm punch drunk on no sleep what my favorite lines are that I've written, because I have several, and they make me laugh every time I think about them--and yes, my own writing makes me laugh.)
Anyway, that is that. Up next: why going to the dentist is a horrible, no good, very bad idea.
I recently wrote a story. One person read it and gave tons of positive feedback, telling me everything she liked, and helping fix a few things I got wrong (what even is weightlifting? What do you mean different muscles get used on different days? wHAT IS CHEST DAY?) and generally encouraging me to finish the dang thing. I was immensely proud of it once completed, much of which I attribute to this person because her encouragement is what spurred me on to finish it in the first place.
A couple months later, I had a second person read it. She left no comments except for when she announced she'd finished it: "I loved it until the last chapter. The ending is rushed and I hate the epilogue." The semi-rational part of me figures I should listen to the feedback I ask for. The other semi-rational part of me demands such feedback to be given in a compliment sandwich: "This bit is great. Here's the thing you need to fix. This bit is great." The neruotic part of me panicked and figured I'd written absolute garbage. Still, just to make sure, I went back and read the last fourth. My conclusion? Reader 2 is smoking something, because that story is brilliant and hilarious, ended well, and the epilogue is the sort of epilogue I hunger for. Reader 1 agreed with me when we discussed it, so in the end I changed absolutely nothing because it's hard to mess with perfection. :D
I've got a third person reading it at the moment, and every new chapter she looks at causes my neurotic little freak to rear her ugly head and panic because what if this is the chapter she hates? She has yet to hate it, but you never know. Still, I'm always hesitant to read her comments, which is ridiculous, because she has yet to say anything mean.
I don't remember where I saw/heard it (probably on tumblr), but someone said that when giving feedback, never be the kind of reviewer who makes the creator want to stop creating. That had a profound effect on how I respond to other people's writing. At the end of any project, I want the writer to feel pleased and inspired to create something new. I never want to be the reason they want to crawl in a hole and bury themselves in the mud. There are enough garbage people in the world who will make it their aim to be that kind of person, so I don't need to jump on that bandwagon. I'm trying to practice Thumper's Law of Civility.
That doesn't mean I can never give corrective feedback. I'm a teacher; I have an educational duty to give corrective feedback. But there is a huge difference between "this doesn't make sense," "I'm not seeing the connection," "I don't understand" and "this is stupid," "you did this wrong," "boo you suck."
Reader 2, after some prompting from me, came back and offered suggestions on how I could fix what she deemed to be problems. (For the record, I did take her seriously. One of her concerns I had addressed in a previous chapter, and quite well, if I do say so myself (obviously I do; I just did) and the other was a matter of taste. She doesn't like the particular style of epilogue I used, which is a fair criticism, but I do like it, and don't see a need to change). If you're going to offer corrective feedback, it should come with suggestions for improvement. Just to mark something as bad and leave it hanging tells me, the writer, that you, the reader, don't know what you're talking about. I ignore that kind of feedback. But "I dislike/don't agree with this, here's a possible suggestion to improve it" is something I will consider, whether ultimately I decide to decline or accept your suggestion.
I've got another story in the works that a friend read. I knew there was something wrong with it; I was just too close to the words to figure out the problem. She pointed out several things I could work on, most of which she's right about. But here's the kicker: I hate editing. It's the pits. My response is to go write something new instead of fixing the old.
...Yeah. I know. I'll figure it out eventually.
Anyway, none of this is to say you should ask for any of my stories. I will be highly embarrassed if you do and have to figure out how to pretend like I didn't hear the request. Or I'll give you one of my past NaNoWriMos. I'm awfully fond of the Aunistee story, and not very embarrassed about it, so it's safe to hand out. Hot Marketing Boy's also a safe bet.
People have asked me over the years if I want to write a book, and the honest answer is I don't know, leaning towards the no side. I don't know if I can handle my writing being among the mass public. Though if I ever did write one, it would definitely be a romance, which guarantees almost no one in my family would read it. That saves me from their judgment, but on the other hand, they're missing out, because dang, I'm hilarious.
(Ask me sometime at 2am when I'm punch drunk on no sleep what my favorite lines are that I've written, because I have several, and they make me laugh every time I think about them--and yes, my own writing makes me laugh.)
Anyway, that is that. Up next: why going to the dentist is a horrible, no good, very bad idea.