*insert incoherent screaming here*
Since it's one of her rare days off, mom and I went out to eat after running some errands today, but I ended up having a massive dizzy spell in the middle of the restaurant and had to leave. One of those ones where everything goes blurry, there's a pressure around my head and chest so intense that I'm seconds away from passing out, my heart's flipping out, there's this loud pulsing sound in my ears, and afterward I'm completely drained and extremely irritable. Then, when I got home and started to relax, the neighbors started doing yard work near my bedroom window, and they're still out there yelling and using chainsaws and other loud machinery, which is, of course freaking out the dogs, who are barking non-fucking-stop and now I'm just waiting for the panic attack to end and maybe take the migraine with it. I want to hit something with a bat but I don't have one and anyway I'd just end up overexerting myself and passing out.
I guess I should probably see a doctor, but fuck it, it's not like they fucking took me seriously the last two goddamn fucking times I saw them about this exact same goddamn fucking problem, so I'm thinking that maybe I should just let it get worse until they have no choice but to take me seriously, assuming they ever will. I could fall down dead in front of them and they'd just say, "Oh, you just need your meds adjusted. Stop taking this one and double up on that one. Are you sure it's not all in your head?"
I guess I should probably see a doctor, but fuck it, it's not like they fucking took me seriously the last two goddamn fucking times I saw them about this exact same goddamn fucking problem, so I'm thinking that maybe I should just let it get worse until they have no choice but to take me seriously, assuming they ever will. I could fall down dead in front of them and they'd just say, "Oh, you just need your meds adjusted. Stop taking this one and double up on that one. Are you sure it's not all in your head?"