blowin through the jasmine in my mind...
tried to post this 2 or 3 times now. but livejournal seems to have its head up its ass again. ive copied my would-be entry into microsoft word and i’ll try posting it again tomorrow.
tonight was fucking shite. in some ways anyway.
went to moshulu with dawn and dave. was having a really good time and getting along really well with people. but then the real adventures began.
i was walking down the stairs from the toilets with my first drink of the night in my hand. obviously not drunk. a bouncer that we've had trouble with before actually pushed me down the stairs. this isnt a word of a lie. she pushed me. i stumbled down 5 or 6 steps and dropped my drink. glass smashed all over the floor and i was pretty stunned. as you would be.
so i put my hand on this bouncers shoulder to get her attention and just to say that i thought it INCREDIBLY stupid of her to push people down stairs. especially lots of metal stairs when she has no idea how drunk they might be. and she grabs me and threw me out for trying to start a fight with her! i couldnt even believe what was going on. and it only gets worse from here on.
after being thrown out i started speaking to the bouncers at the door. they said "yeah shes a fucking bitch. her names kerry. please complain about her and get her sacked cause we cant fuckin stand her". ok thats not verbatim but its pretty much what they said. they probably said the words “fuck” and “aye min” a lot more than that.
so fair enough. im thinking... hey these guys arent so bad. theyre taking my side and realising that im not drunk at all. so i asked "so why exactly have i been thrown out?"
"because youre a cocksucker. you suck cocks."
not exactly the reply i was expecting. so after standing for half an hour in the pissing rain waiting for my friends the bouncers said all this and more said to me:
"youre a fucking disgrace to the male race. are you really poor or something? can you not afford food? go eat 50 burgers and come back."
i started to make a rollie and one of them said... "whats wrong with you? can you not afford a packet of fags? if youre gonna die you could at least do it with style and buy a packet of camels."
after that last one, the bouncer who said it immediately took a packet of drum out of his pocket and made a rollie too. im dunno if i'll ever understand what the fuck he was talking about.
i told them that id been dumped that night. in the hopes of getting some kind of sympathy or understanding out of them. ok so i lied. big fuckin deal. they were being cocks. their reply?
"was it a he or a she?"
"a she"
"well shes probably doin someone else in the toilets right now so you can just fuck off home."
all in all - if you havent gotten the jist already - i had a piss poor night. im completely fuckin stunned by the half hour of abuse i got from the bouncers. im still at a loss to figure out why i got thrown out.
oh yeah. some girl wearing a short skirt and bisto all over her skin came tottering out the door maybe 10 minutes after i got escorted from the premises. one of the bouncers said to her "what the fuck are you doin in a place like this with legs like that?" this is just after theyve been discussing how all the girls in moshulu are "mingers". so theyre not exactly doing moshulu any favours either.
its now 5.15am in the morning. im STILL completely sober. been sitting in dawns flat for a while telling her and dave the whole story. i will be complaining to moshulu AND the security company that the bouncers work for. and it probably wont make the slightest difference.
i still cant actually believe how shit those bouncers were to me.
8:30am. hello!!! im still up. decided not to go to bed. i was so pissed off with those bouncers that i just couldnt sleep. so i played guitar for a bit, listened to tom waits for a few hours and then started reading a biography of jack kerouac that ive had for ages but never started. and i feel much happier. ive spent waaayyyyy too long being depressed and im not gonna let some ignorant cunts completely ruin my mood for me.
janes back soon, ive got a new flat, we're having a flat warming next week and it looks like i actually might get back into uni. too much good stuff happening right now. so im gonna do some writing on the computer and then finish unpacking the last few boxes in my room. yay!
all is well.
tonight was fucking shite. in some ways anyway.
went to moshulu with dawn and dave. was having a really good time and getting along really well with people. but then the real adventures began.
i was walking down the stairs from the toilets with my first drink of the night in my hand. obviously not drunk. a bouncer that we've had trouble with before actually pushed me down the stairs. this isnt a word of a lie. she pushed me. i stumbled down 5 or 6 steps and dropped my drink. glass smashed all over the floor and i was pretty stunned. as you would be.
so i put my hand on this bouncers shoulder to get her attention and just to say that i thought it INCREDIBLY stupid of her to push people down stairs. especially lots of metal stairs when she has no idea how drunk they might be. and she grabs me and threw me out for trying to start a fight with her! i couldnt even believe what was going on. and it only gets worse from here on.
after being thrown out i started speaking to the bouncers at the door. they said "yeah shes a fucking bitch. her names kerry. please complain about her and get her sacked cause we cant fuckin stand her". ok thats not verbatim but its pretty much what they said. they probably said the words “fuck” and “aye min” a lot more than that.
so fair enough. im thinking... hey these guys arent so bad. theyre taking my side and realising that im not drunk at all. so i asked "so why exactly have i been thrown out?"
"because youre a cocksucker. you suck cocks."
not exactly the reply i was expecting. so after standing for half an hour in the pissing rain waiting for my friends the bouncers said all this and more said to me:
"youre a fucking disgrace to the male race. are you really poor or something? can you not afford food? go eat 50 burgers and come back."
i started to make a rollie and one of them said... "whats wrong with you? can you not afford a packet of fags? if youre gonna die you could at least do it with style and buy a packet of camels."
after that last one, the bouncer who said it immediately took a packet of drum out of his pocket and made a rollie too. im dunno if i'll ever understand what the fuck he was talking about.
i told them that id been dumped that night. in the hopes of getting some kind of sympathy or understanding out of them. ok so i lied. big fuckin deal. they were being cocks. their reply?
"was it a he or a she?"
"a she"
"well shes probably doin someone else in the toilets right now so you can just fuck off home."
all in all - if you havent gotten the jist already - i had a piss poor night. im completely fuckin stunned by the half hour of abuse i got from the bouncers. im still at a loss to figure out why i got thrown out.
oh yeah. some girl wearing a short skirt and bisto all over her skin came tottering out the door maybe 10 minutes after i got escorted from the premises. one of the bouncers said to her "what the fuck are you doin in a place like this with legs like that?" this is just after theyve been discussing how all the girls in moshulu are "mingers". so theyre not exactly doing moshulu any favours either.
its now 5.15am in the morning. im STILL completely sober. been sitting in dawns flat for a while telling her and dave the whole story. i will be complaining to moshulu AND the security company that the bouncers work for. and it probably wont make the slightest difference.
i still cant actually believe how shit those bouncers were to me.
8:30am. hello!!! im still up. decided not to go to bed. i was so pissed off with those bouncers that i just couldnt sleep. so i played guitar for a bit, listened to tom waits for a few hours and then started reading a biography of jack kerouac that ive had for ages but never started. and i feel much happier. ive spent waaayyyyy too long being depressed and im not gonna let some ignorant cunts completely ruin my mood for me.
janes back soon, ive got a new flat, we're having a flat warming next week and it looks like i actually might get back into uni. too much good stuff happening right now. so im gonna do some writing on the computer and then finish unpacking the last few boxes in my room. yay!
all is well.