Magic and Loss - The Summation
That phone is cold. If only I had a cell.
Fixed the tail-lights today. Just two burnt-out bulbs. Actually, surprised the jerk didn't do more damage to my tail light. But I have brake lights now, so all is good.
Summer is a denial of purpose for me. Too hot. Too bored. Too angry. And I've been here before, so I am gonna not waste your time by describing the nothing that's changed.
Been reading The Prophet by Khalil Gibran. Probably the closest thing I will ever get to a Bible. Had it for years, but I don't think I ever understood what it meant until recently. Check it out, because it is beautiful.
He said, "If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were."
Is that what I need to do? Do I stop looking for love so actively and trust that things may work out? I know what I did wrong last time, and I can see the truth of that in this quote. I don't know. I just wish I knew where to go from here. What is the next step? What is my next move? I feel so blind still, groping through the dark for some life-line. Something that I can hold on to and trust that it will save me. All this time I have been looking for someone to save again. What if it is me that I need to save? And I know that it is. I need to figure out who and what I am. Who am I?
-Owen
Fixed the tail-lights today. Just two burnt-out bulbs. Actually, surprised the jerk didn't do more damage to my tail light. But I have brake lights now, so all is good.
Summer is a denial of purpose for me. Too hot. Too bored. Too angry. And I've been here before, so I am gonna not waste your time by describing the nothing that's changed.
Been reading The Prophet by Khalil Gibran. Probably the closest thing I will ever get to a Bible. Had it for years, but I don't think I ever understood what it meant until recently. Check it out, because it is beautiful.
He said, "If you love somebody, let them go, for if they return, they were always yours. And if they don't, they never were."
Is that what I need to do? Do I stop looking for love so actively and trust that things may work out? I know what I did wrong last time, and I can see the truth of that in this quote. I don't know. I just wish I knew where to go from here. What is the next step? What is my next move? I feel so blind still, groping through the dark for some life-line. Something that I can hold on to and trust that it will save me. All this time I have been looking for someone to save again. What if it is me that I need to save? And I know that it is. I need to figure out who and what I am. Who am I?
-Owen