(no subject)
I never write in here anymore...or anywhere else for that matter. I haven't been inspired. Actually, it's been quite the opposite. I've felt so ridiculously uninspired that I haven't written a song since march. Cameron drained me physically, mentally and emotionally, leaving me incapable of even being able to concentrate on writing something. I feel so utterly empty. My friends, boyfriend and parents have all abandened me. All of them at once. It's the lonliest feeling. When the people you "knew" you could depend on let you down, it rocks your fucking world. None of my friends even talk to my anymore. It's like I died. I only moved 45 minutes away people. I'm not fucking dead!!!! My friends seem to think it's ok to flirt with my ex. My ex who I was with for 5 months and gave my whole heart to, just for it to get fucking trampled on. They flirt with him right on myspace where they know i'm going to read it. What the fuck? seriously....WHAT THE FUCK????!!! I don't understand how people can be so cruel. It's like they get enjoyment from seeing me in pain. They like the fact that I cry myself to sleep because of them. It's makes them feel powerful or something. It's fucking sick. People are fucking sick.....especially people from Valencia. There's something in the water there. Something that makes people cold and heartless. Something that makes them turn their backs on me in my time of need. I never needed them before and I do now and they abandon me. Fuck them. Honestly. They don't even answer my calls or e-mails anymore. I think it's because they're too ashamed of what they've done. They can be mean to me in a group, but when I call them individually they talk about how much they miss me. Ha!! They don't miss me. Whatever...I don't know how to end this post.