Memory of Money
Spent most of the day discussing Money and the Women's Movement, specifically where funds that support women's rights are invested and who's investing them. Interesting stuff that AWID is looking into to track trends in financial support and fundraising for women's organisations and rights. But one of the most interesting things mentioned today was how a person's first memory of money influences how one behaves towards money -- in all levels, be it the behaviour of individual donors in allocating their resources, to how women in charge of raising funds for their organisations see the task of fundraising and financial accountability. Interesting shit.
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My first memory of money was not being allowed by my mother to have cash. Everything that I needed was provided for and I if I wanted something, I had to ask for my mom to buy for me. Velma long held the belief that kids with cash at their disposal were more prone to bad things -- like buying things they shouldn't buy or going to places they shouldn't be in.
The only time my mother ever gave me money while I was a kid was when the school asked for donation for whatever charitable institution.
Equally memorable to me was how one of my godfathers, a Poker Buddy of the Manipulative Bastard, attempted to fulfill his godfatherly duties towards me by handing me 500 pesos everytime he saw me (usually on the monthly poker games the Manipulative Bastard hosted at our place), and I was given the freedom to spend that gift on anything I wanted (comic books, toys, books, Mad Magazine). I think that lasted til I was around 8.
Fast forward to now and my relationship with money. Money is meant to be spent on things / places / experiences to make me happy / make others happy / satisfy an curiosity / experience a new thing / get something done. In order for money to have value, it has to have purpose. And I don't save money for its own sake. I save money in order to pay for a vacation / buy a drool-worthy pair of shoes / throw a party / buy a new gadget. I think the Tagalog term for that is galit sa pera.
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Still trying to think about the connections between my first memory of money and how I see / use / spend / earn money as an adult. Are there direct correlations? Are the connections linear? Am I having convenient memories to justify my current money values?
I need to sleep.
******
My first memory of money was not being allowed by my mother to have cash. Everything that I needed was provided for and I if I wanted something, I had to ask for my mom to buy for me. Velma long held the belief that kids with cash at their disposal were more prone to bad things -- like buying things they shouldn't buy or going to places they shouldn't be in.
The only time my mother ever gave me money while I was a kid was when the school asked for donation for whatever charitable institution.
Equally memorable to me was how one of my godfathers, a Poker Buddy of the Manipulative Bastard, attempted to fulfill his godfatherly duties towards me by handing me 500 pesos everytime he saw me (usually on the monthly poker games the Manipulative Bastard hosted at our place), and I was given the freedom to spend that gift on anything I wanted (comic books, toys, books, Mad Magazine). I think that lasted til I was around 8.
Fast forward to now and my relationship with money. Money is meant to be spent on things / places / experiences to make me happy / make others happy / satisfy an curiosity / experience a new thing / get something done. In order for money to have value, it has to have purpose. And I don't save money for its own sake. I save money in order to pay for a vacation / buy a drool-worthy pair of shoes / throw a party / buy a new gadget. I think the Tagalog term for that is galit sa pera.
*****
Still trying to think about the connections between my first memory of money and how I see / use / spend / earn money as an adult. Are there direct correlations? Are the connections linear? Am I having convenient memories to justify my current money values?
I need to sleep.