Repent! The End is Extremely Fucking Nigh!
i have been in the bitchiest mood ever lately, and i have no idea why. actually saturday i was pissed off cause i got no sleep friday night and had to get up for saturday detention, and then i had to work. sunday i was in a bad mood cause i had to go to work even though it was raining and crappy and there were no customers. yesterday and today though, i've had no excuse. yesterday morning, i walked into homeroom wearing my cute new skirt from work, and thinking about this cute denim jacket from the gap that i was going to ask jen to buy for me cause she works there and gets a discount and it would look really cute with the aforementioned brand new skirt. so i get to homeroom, and jen's wearing the jacket, cause she's already bought it for herself. and i ask her if i could try it on, and she's bought the medium, and i fit an extra small, so it's not even like i can borrow it from her. and so that annoyed me. and then i was telling her my grand scheme to get it and wear it with the skirt, and demonstrating how cute it all was, and she goes "yeah, but it's cuter on me." and i know she was joking, and i probably would have said the exact same thing, given the circumstances, but that just pissed me off further, because it did NOT look cuter on her, it was way cuter on me, cause she was wearing jeans, and they didn't match exactly right and it was just too much denim. and just the fact that i was getting so agitated by something so superficial and stupid and petty pissed me off agian. and then today i bit her head off again because i walked in the door and she runs up to me and is like, "i need ten dollars for cheif's present!" and it infuriated me, cause she's been asking me for it forever, and i told her she could have it when i cashed my paycheck, and today i had the money, so it wasn't a big deal, but it just got on my nerves for some reason. i think i just take out frustrations on jen though. because sometimes, there are people who piss you off for no reason, and i think she is one of them. i don't mean for it to be that way, and i get along fine with her 99% of the time, but sometimes she just gets under my skin. i think because she can be so...spineless towards everyone else except me. like, lindsay and connor and ryan can do no wrong in her eyes, but then everything i do is to be frowned upon. like when sam and i started going out, she asked me how we were, and i told her i was having fun, and she goes: "well don't have too much fun." and i'm like, what the hell is that supposed to mean? it's as if she's just waiting for me to do something crazy and stupid, cause i'm leah and that's what i do, i do stupid shit and get in trouble. it's like she has this set role for me in her head and so everything i do must be crazy and irresponsible, regardless of whether or not it actually is, becuase that's what leah does. i can't even describe it properly, i know what it is, but it's hard to put into words. and i know in her head it's justified becuase she thinks she's looking out for my well-being, but the point is that i don't need her to look out for my well-being, i'm not a child. that's what it is, she treats me like a child who doesn't know any better. and it bugs me. and don't get me wrong, i love jen, and will always be her friend regardless because she can be an awesome person most of the time, but sometimes i just don't need that crap. ehh, this was supposed to be an update about today being the second-to-last day of school, but the five minute bell just rang, so that one's gonna have to wait.