그대 한걸음만 다가와요. [2/?]
II. 언제나 이렇게 웃어요 난 [I always smile like this.]
After SHINee debuted, Minho learned quite a few things about his new group mates (and roommates, for the time being - or for however long SM decided to have them living together) that put things into perspective for him.
Their leader, in particular, he learned a lot about in those early days of debut. Jinki was a very good hyung, a very stable singer, and a surprisingly good leader - but he was so clumsy that his lack of physical aptitude made Minho wonder about who was the older one between them.
Of course, he made a conscious effort to keep an eye on Jinki whenever he lost his balance or tripped on two left feet, because who else would catch him before he fell? Jonghyun might, but he would just point and laugh whenever Jinki would trip; one of these days, Minho thought, Jinki would get himself seriously hurt and Jonghyun wouldn’t take his injury seriously. Kibum might, but he would nag at the poor guy for making Kibum so concerned; it was a reaction with all the best intentions, but Minho knew that with Kibum, things never quite came out the way they were intended.
And then, there was Taemin, who always seemed earnest and eager to please - so much that Minho sometimes forgot that he was only two years younger than him.
While filming their reality show “SHINee Yunhanam” in particular, Minho found he was seeing a different side of all the members with each and every passing day. Perhaps it was the effect of a rolling camera, but Minho knew the way they acted in the privacy of their shared dorm was similar, too.
Kibum was just as self-assured (most of the time) in public as he was at home, Jinki was just as much of a worrywart (sometimes even more than Kibum) in front of the masses as he was at home, and Jonghyun was just as talkative (oftentimes to the extreme) as he was at home.
But Taemin was different.
When they first debuted, Minho felt as reserved as he did awkward in front of the camera - to the point where the words he wanted to say would die somewhere in his throat and never come out. But in Taemin’s case, the more he was in front of the camera, the more Taemin came out of his shy and reluctant shell.
He still followed exactly what the directors instructed him to do (unlike Minho, who reluctantly took what they said into account), but Taemin didn’t seem to have a problem adopting his identity as “Youngest Taemin,” showing off a cute smile or a little dance when prompted without hesitation. It takes a careful balancing act for him to slip the façade of an idol’s image on and off, but Taemin seemed to already be figuring out what it took.
And Minho admired him for that.
“You can do it, too, hyung.” Taemin chirped, as they leaned against the railing of the bungee-jump platform and felt the warm post-summer breeze. “I’ll jump right after you do, okay? And we’ll meet each other at the bottom.”
“You think it’s a good idea if I say ‘SHINee fighting’ before I jump?” Minho asked, looking down at the dot-sized Jonghyun and Jinki sitting on a dockside bench by the lake. “You know. As a good luck charm.”
He turned to Taemin, surprised to see the maknae smiling as if he had won the lottery.
“That’s a great idea!” Taemin exclaimed, bumping shoulders with Minho. “I was planning on saying something like that, too…so that’s perfect!”
The cameramen were already beckoning Minho over to have his harness properly fastened to get ready to jump - but Minho turned back to Taemin quickly so that he could ask the question nagging at him since before:
“Why, what were you planning on saying before you jump, Taemin-ah?”
“SHINee forever!” Taemin called to Minho’s retreating back, waving lanky arms and clenched fists. “Minho-hyung, fighting! SHINee, fighting!”
Forever, Minho thought, was flying free on a bungee cord and taking in the blurred colors of the scenery below. Forever, Minho thought, was breathing in solid chunks of air and feeling the excitement for whatever the future could bring them next build up inside of him.
Forever, Minho thought, was a strange and faraway concept, indeed.
(But as soon as Taemin was back on the ground, tumbling into his arms to be embraced in a one-armed congratulatory hug, Minho wondered if the toothy smile and the bright sparkle to those soft and pretty downturned eyes was enough to make him believe forever might be closer than he thought.)
[to be continued.]
continue to part III?