Took wifey out for a nice dinner last night to celebrate our one-month anniversary. Can ya believe it peeps? The gorilla's been married for one whole month already! Woah mamma
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Haha.. sounds like you've adapted yourself well to married life. :) I guess certain regular "spousal duties" do play a part and serves as great motivation yah? *winks*
Btw, just curious, do you discuss spousal duties (I mean the household kind, like cleaning the house etc) with your wife before marriage? Like 'delegate' who would be doing what kinda housework?
I have to confess. It's not easy to learning to live with someone else under the same roof, no matter how much you love them. Can't say I've adapted well yet judging from the amount of
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Hmm.. good advice. Thanks! :) Think the change in mindset is very important to keep the r/s going. Guess everybody will need time to adjust. I know of some people who said that b4 n after marriage their spouse seemed like a different person and they would quarrel over small little things. Such stories always make me think 'twice' about 'marriage'..
Just a OT question, did u bring J to buy her engagement ring, then choose a time when she least expects it to propose to her or did u just buy (without her knowledge)?
Babe, I think it's quite natural for newly wed couples to argue about the little things initially. Actually, you'll be amazed at how ingrained one's little habits and bevarioural patterns can be! In fact, the more "insignificant" they are, the more ingrained they can be ... like the way you squeeze toothpaste, or how you like your cups/dishes/cutlery arranged, or the way you like rice cooked, etc. It'll be quite amazing if newly weds don't argue over such things at all initially.
The important things is not to take such arguments personally and to realise that it's all part of the process of adjusting and adapting to one another. Like I mentioned in a previous post, learn to let go (and adapt) if something doesn't kill you. Heh, easy to say but much harder to put in practice. ;)
No, I didn't bring J to buy the engagement ring although I did do my homework beforehand ... her ring size, the kinda design she likes, etc. I wanted it to be a surprise. ;)
Haha.. makes sense. Guess for a gal, I'm quite casual about certain things, like how cups/dishes etc are arranged, the way the toothpaste is squeezed etc. My boy will have an easier time I guess.. He is the one who's more particular about stuff and as long as it doesn't affect me too much, he can have his way. hahaa..
I asked about the ring cos my boy was bringing up this topic that day. He said that he was afraid that if one day he went to buy a ring for me but i dun like the design or what, then he won't know what to do, so he's not sure if he should propose (when he's ready) without the ring, but with something in replacement first or bring me to get it (which will kill the surprise). Haha..
Actually, I can be more anal about some things that J ... only I didn't realise it until she moved in. I guess it comes from living on my own for several years and getting used to doing things a certain way ... well, MY way. For one, I'm very particularly about the electronic stuff around the house (luckily J doesn't really care so she gives in to me). Anyway, there's still a lot of adjusting I need to do myself. I know that .... so it's hard for me to get upset with J if she does things another way coz, hey, I'm the same! LOL!
Teach you ... hint to him! When you're out with him, point out the types of designs you like. But you need to do it in such a way, you don't scare him to death lah. Hahaha! Trust me, he'll appreciate your hints coz it's telling him without exactly telling him ... so he feels like he made the right decision. Heh, it's all about massaging the male ego and letting him feel he's in control ... but still getting what you want! ;)
Doh! Why am I telling a woman this! My brudders sure suan me liao! Oops!
Hahaha.. thanks for the tip! Will bear that in mind. :)
Your brudders won't suan you for this lah.. They'll actually be grateful, if they're not married by planning to be, cos they will stand to 'gain' if the gf happy, they'll be happy too!
Such 'tricks of the trade' is good to share. :) I guess I can now 'employ' you as 'marriage consultant/counsellor'.. ;)
they will stand to 'gain' if the gf happy, they'll be happy too!
You hit the nail on the head! That's exactly what guys SHOULD know, but you'll be amazed how long it takes before the average male realises this. His ego is so damn big that he can't see the forest from the trees. LOL!
Alamak! The gorilla don't wanna be marriage consultant/couselor lah. Sounds a bit like Aunt Agony leh and, right now, being one type of auntie is enough for the gorilla liao ... yah, Toilet Cleaning Auntie. Hahaha!
Btw, just curious, do you discuss spousal duties (I mean the household kind, like cleaning the house etc) with your wife before marriage? Like 'delegate' who would be doing what kinda housework?
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Just a OT question, did u bring J to buy her engagement ring, then choose a time when she least expects it to propose to her or did u just buy (without her knowledge)?
Reply
The important things is not to take such arguments personally and to realise that it's all part of the process of adjusting and adapting to one another. Like I mentioned in a previous post, learn to let go (and adapt) if something doesn't kill you. Heh, easy to say but much harder to put in practice. ;)
No, I didn't bring J to buy the engagement ring although I did do my homework beforehand ... her ring size, the kinda design she likes, etc. I wanted it to be a surprise. ;)
Reply
I asked about the ring cos my boy was bringing up this topic that day. He said that he was afraid that if one day he went to buy a ring for me but i dun like the design or what, then he won't know what to do, so he's not sure if he should propose (when he's ready) without the ring, but with something in replacement first or bring me to get it (which will kill the surprise). Haha..
Reply
Teach you ... hint to him! When you're out with him, point out the types of designs you like. But you need to do it in such a way, you don't scare him to death lah. Hahaha! Trust me, he'll appreciate your hints coz it's telling him without exactly telling him ... so he feels like he made the right decision. Heh, it's all about massaging the male ego and letting him feel he's in control ... but still getting what you want! ;)
Doh! Why am I telling a woman this! My brudders sure suan me liao! Oops!
Reply
Your brudders won't suan you for this lah.. They'll actually be grateful, if they're not married by planning to be, cos they will stand to 'gain' if the gf happy, they'll be happy too!
Such 'tricks of the trade' is good to share. :) I guess I can now 'employ' you as 'marriage consultant/counsellor'.. ;)
Reply
You hit the nail on the head! That's exactly what guys SHOULD know, but you'll be amazed how long it takes before the average male realises this. His ego is so damn big that he can't see the forest from the trees. LOL!
Alamak! The gorilla don't wanna be marriage consultant/couselor lah. Sounds a bit like Aunt Agony leh and, right now, being one type of auntie is enough for the gorilla liao ... yah, Toilet Cleaning Auntie. Hahaha!
Reply
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