life has begun
i am alive...i almost can't believe it. I got through packing and cleaning with a bottle of amaretto that i finished single-handedly in one day....along with a video i made for my sister consisting of me playing dress up around the apartment in kates crap and the tutus from school. it fully gave me a friend to talk to. i still have one suitcase at kate's boy's apartment. i have to say, he was an utter blessing to have. as annoying as he can be it was good to have someone to help me throw furniture out the window....he wants to marry me. he wants to have american citizenship....but then he hinted that he wants to actually be a couple and all......but when he wants to be a couple he means he wants to fall in love and me fall in love too. susie doesn't play that game...what a funny thought. my new apartment is beautiful....its just a big room with hard wooden floors and high ceilings and only a mattress....i just really like it. i've said goodbye to all my friends here....saw nadine off on the train last night...now i am alone...except for the random musicians still lurking the streets of rotterdam. actually they are quite nice....funny fellow nello and his one brother and two sisters left yesterday to return to mozambique....he brought me out with his whole family the other night....very strange....and yet he's the one with the girlfriend....weird...his older brother necco is still around.....quite a lovely one....
i have a new paranoia for flees. I am determined i have flees! I itch all the time....i take 2 showers a day! It's driving me crazy! I made Nadine crazy with it...actually not since she is as crazily paranoid about things as i am and hence we both know how to ease eachothers obsessiveness....but yes, i have flees! i hope not!
Frank has a home! Do you know I had the entire school looking for a home for this cat. I asked every human being i saw. I had one teacher calling me up to give me suggestions and another random woman who works in the communications department of the school calling to give me advice. In the end I ended up walking for one hour with frank in my arms trying to find the animal shelter to force them to take her. She was scared to death and i'm kissing her and petting her and having her fur in my face. it was absolute joy being that i'm allergic to cats. i sat down several times on the side of the road on the concrete to try and call the shelter to find where they were....they never picked up the phone and frank just squirmed like crazy. finally when i was nearly 100m from the shelter this man jogs by me and directs me where the shelter is since i was clearly clueless. he asked why i was bringing frank there....i said he could have her if he wanted....i've asked so many people that i came to always expect a negative answer....he said 'i could do that'....and he did....he took frank in his arms and walked the rest of the way home....i cannot tell you how grateful i am! i wanted to praise him forever more!
so thats my life....i now have nothing to do but try and plan my life. i have no idea....i really have no idea what i am doing....but its good that my life is so utterly empty here so all i can do is try like hell to make something happen. it's day 3 of being out of school.... i haven't make anything happen yet...i tried to get a job today but failed. a job making phone calls...tomorrow.....in the meantime i have a date with a beautiful boy from greece whom i went out with for the first time last night....he's leaving tomorrow...haha...perfect timing...it is though...i don't need guys in my life...they are just good fun every so often.
everyone, i am really cut off from the world. feel free to contact me in any way shape or form. i am functioning fine, but it would be nice to be in contact with life outside of this circus world.
by the way, i am at the laundry place using internet there....it is a funny place
lindsay, i am living on niewe binnenweg across from albert hein...i don't know if you remember that area....i took petina's room for july....marlena lives there too but she has a bf and is never there...hence i can walk around naked :)
i have a new paranoia for flees. I am determined i have flees! I itch all the time....i take 2 showers a day! It's driving me crazy! I made Nadine crazy with it...actually not since she is as crazily paranoid about things as i am and hence we both know how to ease eachothers obsessiveness....but yes, i have flees! i hope not!
Frank has a home! Do you know I had the entire school looking for a home for this cat. I asked every human being i saw. I had one teacher calling me up to give me suggestions and another random woman who works in the communications department of the school calling to give me advice. In the end I ended up walking for one hour with frank in my arms trying to find the animal shelter to force them to take her. She was scared to death and i'm kissing her and petting her and having her fur in my face. it was absolute joy being that i'm allergic to cats. i sat down several times on the side of the road on the concrete to try and call the shelter to find where they were....they never picked up the phone and frank just squirmed like crazy. finally when i was nearly 100m from the shelter this man jogs by me and directs me where the shelter is since i was clearly clueless. he asked why i was bringing frank there....i said he could have her if he wanted....i've asked so many people that i came to always expect a negative answer....he said 'i could do that'....and he did....he took frank in his arms and walked the rest of the way home....i cannot tell you how grateful i am! i wanted to praise him forever more!
so thats my life....i now have nothing to do but try and plan my life. i have no idea....i really have no idea what i am doing....but its good that my life is so utterly empty here so all i can do is try like hell to make something happen. it's day 3 of being out of school.... i haven't make anything happen yet...i tried to get a job today but failed. a job making phone calls...tomorrow.....in the meantime i have a date with a beautiful boy from greece whom i went out with for the first time last night....he's leaving tomorrow...haha...perfect timing...it is though...i don't need guys in my life...they are just good fun every so often.
everyone, i am really cut off from the world. feel free to contact me in any way shape or form. i am functioning fine, but it would be nice to be in contact with life outside of this circus world.
by the way, i am at the laundry place using internet there....it is a funny place
lindsay, i am living on niewe binnenweg across from albert hein...i don't know if you remember that area....i took petina's room for july....marlena lives there too but she has a bf and is never there...hence i can walk around naked :)