(no subject)
I'm so confused right now!!!!! I just don't know what to do. I mean, yes Ben and I have a history together. I was ready to spend my life with him. But when he went to Iraq and pushed me away to try and protect me, whether or not he admits that, with the intention that I'd be around when he came home. But I'm not. I can't. He said some harsh things that its going to take time to get over. I thought I was over but these feelings of hurt that have surfaced the past couple of days are obvious to me that its not over.
I have moved on to boy. :) Yes, I do know that we are just talking once in awhile. But it's something. It's more than I had all summer. I'm excited about the possibilities. Elena said he would be a good guy for me, so did Amanda. And I think they are right. Clinton will be a good friend to say the least. I know, I'm jumping guys a lot lately but this is how I do life. It's just so confusing. And I really shouldn't be focusing at ALL on this because I have SOOOOOOOOOOO much to do right now with Youth. I have a retreat in like 3 weeks and nothing planned. No one is getting back to me like I need them too. I'm freaking out just a WEE bit. like a lot a lot. AHH! Its ok though. I'll survive. :) Ok, im off to do some reading...I haven't done a devo in awhile and I need to right now. I need something! bye
I have moved on to boy. :) Yes, I do know that we are just talking once in awhile. But it's something. It's more than I had all summer. I'm excited about the possibilities. Elena said he would be a good guy for me, so did Amanda. And I think they are right. Clinton will be a good friend to say the least. I know, I'm jumping guys a lot lately but this is how I do life. It's just so confusing. And I really shouldn't be focusing at ALL on this because I have SOOOOOOOOOOO much to do right now with Youth. I have a retreat in like 3 weeks and nothing planned. No one is getting back to me like I need them too. I'm freaking out just a WEE bit. like a lot a lot. AHH! Its ok though. I'll survive. :) Ok, im off to do some reading...I haven't done a devo in awhile and I need to right now. I need something! bye