(no subject)
january 1. huh.
last year, i spent approximately 6 months without a home. i finished my first CD, and began my second. My computer crashed, and i thought that the second CD had been lost. i moved into a new apartment, threw together a new computer from spare parts, and found both of my old hard drives intact. Allison and i started a rocky (but enriching) relationship, and decided to start things aney in 2005. i worked at the choppping block tavern until march, moved to minnesota for the summer, and had an amazing trip back with allison. the badlands were incredible.
i befriended the homeless, the crazy, the addicted, the hated and the misguided. i found pleasure in that which was simple.
my writing improvewd last year. i began a novel which i hope to find the right atmosphere to begin writing again. after returning from minnesota, i spent a short amount of time working in a factory in monroe. after being fired, i had to sell my car to pay rent. to keep sane, i started a band which plays quite regularly at the tavern. i broke promises to those whom i had loved and broike ties with nearly everyone i had considered friends. i lost faith in organized religion, family bonds, the common american and myself. i broke my own moral codes to make ends meet. i attempted to be who i thought everyone needed me to be.
the knowledge of who i truly "am" is my only goal. am i to be a man behind the counter at a 7-eleven, hands raised far above my head, worrying for the fate of my childrent and wife, as a masked figure with a stolen gun tears wads of money from the register? Am i to be the man behind the mask, reinfocing my self-inflicted povery through an act of despatation? Am i the owner of a failing chain of convinience stores, wondering when the other shoe will drop? Am i the balding stock-holder, waking every morning to the aching of my ulcer, the smell of over-priced coffee breaking my stupor? I do not know any longer. But every step i take brings a new piece of evidence to my atttention. Though i falter, i will not admit defeat.
Mr Miyagi/Doogie Hauser/Yogi-Master Moment:
To judge my past actions as perfectly "good" or "bad" only prevents my growth. Should i uproot a tree to prevent a few branches encroaching on the domain of another?
last year, i spent approximately 6 months without a home. i finished my first CD, and began my second. My computer crashed, and i thought that the second CD had been lost. i moved into a new apartment, threw together a new computer from spare parts, and found both of my old hard drives intact. Allison and i started a rocky (but enriching) relationship, and decided to start things aney in 2005. i worked at the choppping block tavern until march, moved to minnesota for the summer, and had an amazing trip back with allison. the badlands were incredible.
i befriended the homeless, the crazy, the addicted, the hated and the misguided. i found pleasure in that which was simple.
my writing improvewd last year. i began a novel which i hope to find the right atmosphere to begin writing again. after returning from minnesota, i spent a short amount of time working in a factory in monroe. after being fired, i had to sell my car to pay rent. to keep sane, i started a band which plays quite regularly at the tavern. i broke promises to those whom i had loved and broike ties with nearly everyone i had considered friends. i lost faith in organized religion, family bonds, the common american and myself. i broke my own moral codes to make ends meet. i attempted to be who i thought everyone needed me to be.
the knowledge of who i truly "am" is my only goal. am i to be a man behind the counter at a 7-eleven, hands raised far above my head, worrying for the fate of my childrent and wife, as a masked figure with a stolen gun tears wads of money from the register? Am i to be the man behind the mask, reinfocing my self-inflicted povery through an act of despatation? Am i the owner of a failing chain of convinience stores, wondering when the other shoe will drop? Am i the balding stock-holder, waking every morning to the aching of my ulcer, the smell of over-priced coffee breaking my stupor? I do not know any longer. But every step i take brings a new piece of evidence to my atttention. Though i falter, i will not admit defeat.
Mr Miyagi/Doogie Hauser/Yogi-Master Moment:
To judge my past actions as perfectly "good" or "bad" only prevents my growth. Should i uproot a tree to prevent a few branches encroaching on the domain of another?