Ficlet | Going Out is Overrated
Title: Going Out is Overrated
Author: attilatehbun
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing/Characters: Ron Weasley/Draco Malfoy
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 900+
Summary: Draco really resents being dragged along on Ron's errands.
Author's Notes: Spontaneous ficlet for tehgiantsquid, for years of being 129,000% AWESOMETASTIC.
believe you've brought me to the Mu-- your ex-girlfriend's flat," Draco said as Weasley pulled out a ring of keys and fumbled for the right one. The sight of such obviously Muggle keys stretched Draco's sneer even wider, but Ron took no notice. Whether he was either ignoring Draco on purpose or was actually, yes, in fact, just that thick, Draco didn't know, but he was inclined to bet on the latter.
"Since that ex-girlfriend is one of the few people I know who can actually stand you, Malfoy," he was saying as he unlocked the door, "I'd watch what you say about her or her flat, got it?"
Though Ron's tone was casual, his eyes definitely weren't, and Draco decided that maybe the Weasel hadn't been ignoring him as much as Draco had thought, so instead of replying with some no doubt witty and cutting remark (just because he hadn't thought of it yet didn't mean that he wouldn't have. Eventually.) and simply tsked as he followed Ron into the flat.
Weasley immediately headed for the tiny galley kitchen and began rummaging around in the cabinets under the sink. Draco edged into the flat, awkwardly leaning against a doorframe and trying to look as if this wasn't bloody odd. Luckily, he found that if he tilted his head just slightly to the right, he could see Weasley's denim-clad arse sticking in the air, and while it might have been odd for Draco to be admiring that arse, given the particular Weasley it was attached to (even considering things, and those were odd enough as it was), admiring arses in general wasn't out of the norm at all, and it put him back on somewhat more comfortable footing.
Odd that the view was getting a bit hazy though. It wasn't that nice of an arse.
"Oi, Weasley. What exactly have you dragged me here to do, anyway?" he said. Or, at least, tried to. Rather than the carefully drawled words he had meant to say when he opened his mouth, what came out instead was a loud, completely undiginified sneeze. He raised his head and opened his mouth to comment on it, and promptly sneezed again. And again. And then one more time for good measure.
And his vision was definitely hazy now, unless the wood of the floor was some particularly spectacular type he'd never encountered before.
Draco scrubbed at his eyes and pinched his nose to hold back another sneeze and tried again.
"Weasley," he said, cursing his newly stuffy nose for robbing his words of the bite they really needed to have, "is there a cat in this fucking flat?"
Ron tsked with his head still under the sink. "Of course there is, Malfoy. That's what we came here for, remember?" He stood and shuffled out of the kitchen, a tin of cat food and an opener in his hands. "I told you th--"
At the expression on Weasley's face, Draco attempted to snarl What? but only succeeded at sneezing loudly again. Apparently Weasley still got the general impression, though.
"You look--" the insufferable idiot gasped between peals of disgustingly ridiculous laughter, "even more-- like a ferret-- than you usually do."
Draco could only assume that Weasley was referring to his eyes, which were undoubtedly a bright, violent red at this point. When he recovered from his rage-induced sneezing fit, he shouted, "Weasley you utter sod, I AM ALLERGIC TO CATS!"
Ron straightened and scowled. "Well I didn't know that, did I? Maybe if you'd paid attention when I told you--"
Draco cut him off with a shove to the chest. "I didn't ask - sneeze - you to bring - sneeze - me along on your little - sneeze - domestic - sneeze - errands!"
Of course, the Weasel shoved back. Rather hard too, considering Draco was currently suffering, and was thus not at one hundred percent. The idiot should really have had more sense.
"No," he bellowed, "you asked me to take you out somewhere for once, but I'd already promised Hermione I'd feed Crookshanks, and you just couldn't wait for me to come pick you up af--"
Ron's yelling came to a sputtering stop as Draco grabbed him by the hair at the back of his head and kissed him. Draco wrenched his lips away after a moment and smirked at Weasley's expression. He looked even more ridiculous than usual; anger and lust and a hint of confusion was a good look for him.
"Going out is overrated," Draco said, impressed with himself that he refrained from sneezing even once during the entire sentence.
"Yeah," Weasley said, oh-so-intelligently.
"Look," Draco said, trying desperately not to sneeze in Ron's face, as that would likely start another argument and he would really prefer to be in a bedroom when that happened, "feed the blasted animal, then meet me back at mine in five, yeah?"
"Sounds," Ron said, and cleared his throat. "Sounds good."
"Good," Draco pulled away. He managed to get fully clear before sneezing again. "Just. Just make sure you're clear of fur before you Apparate."
"I do know how to use a cleaning spell, you stinking ferret," Weasely said, his face darkening again.
"Prove it." And before he could reply, Draco turned on the spot and Disapparated, figuring five minutes was enough time to get Weasely's anger simmering nicely.
And sure enough, five minutes later on the dot, he was not disappointed.
::fin::
Author: attilatehbun
Fandom: Harry Potter
Pairing/Characters: Ron Weasley/Draco Malfoy
Rating: PG-13
Word Count: 900+
Summary: Draco really resents being dragged along on Ron's errands.
Author's Notes: Spontaneous ficlet for tehgiantsquid, for years of being 129,000% AWESOMETASTIC.
believe you've brought me to the Mu-- your ex-girlfriend's flat," Draco said as Weasley pulled out a ring of keys and fumbled for the right one. The sight of such obviously Muggle keys stretched Draco's sneer even wider, but Ron took no notice. Whether he was either ignoring Draco on purpose or was actually, yes, in fact, just that thick, Draco didn't know, but he was inclined to bet on the latter.
"Since that ex-girlfriend is one of the few people I know who can actually stand you, Malfoy," he was saying as he unlocked the door, "I'd watch what you say about her or her flat, got it?"
Though Ron's tone was casual, his eyes definitely weren't, and Draco decided that maybe the Weasel hadn't been ignoring him as much as Draco had thought, so instead of replying with some no doubt witty and cutting remark (just because he hadn't thought of it yet didn't mean that he wouldn't have. Eventually.) and simply tsked as he followed Ron into the flat.
Weasley immediately headed for the tiny galley kitchen and began rummaging around in the cabinets under the sink. Draco edged into the flat, awkwardly leaning against a doorframe and trying to look as if this wasn't bloody odd. Luckily, he found that if he tilted his head just slightly to the right, he could see Weasley's denim-clad arse sticking in the air, and while it might have been odd for Draco to be admiring that arse, given the particular Weasley it was attached to (even considering things, and those were odd enough as it was), admiring arses in general wasn't out of the norm at all, and it put him back on somewhat more comfortable footing.
Odd that the view was getting a bit hazy though. It wasn't that nice of an arse.
"Oi, Weasley. What exactly have you dragged me here to do, anyway?" he said. Or, at least, tried to. Rather than the carefully drawled words he had meant to say when he opened his mouth, what came out instead was a loud, completely undiginified sneeze. He raised his head and opened his mouth to comment on it, and promptly sneezed again. And again. And then one more time for good measure.
And his vision was definitely hazy now, unless the wood of the floor was some particularly spectacular type he'd never encountered before.
Draco scrubbed at his eyes and pinched his nose to hold back another sneeze and tried again.
"Weasley," he said, cursing his newly stuffy nose for robbing his words of the bite they really needed to have, "is there a cat in this fucking flat?"
Ron tsked with his head still under the sink. "Of course there is, Malfoy. That's what we came here for, remember?" He stood and shuffled out of the kitchen, a tin of cat food and an opener in his hands. "I told you th--"
At the expression on Weasley's face, Draco attempted to snarl What? but only succeeded at sneezing loudly again. Apparently Weasley still got the general impression, though.
"You look--" the insufferable idiot gasped between peals of disgustingly ridiculous laughter, "even more-- like a ferret-- than you usually do."
Draco could only assume that Weasley was referring to his eyes, which were undoubtedly a bright, violent red at this point. When he recovered from his rage-induced sneezing fit, he shouted, "Weasley you utter sod, I AM ALLERGIC TO CATS!"
Ron straightened and scowled. "Well I didn't know that, did I? Maybe if you'd paid attention when I told you--"
Draco cut him off with a shove to the chest. "I didn't ask - sneeze - you to bring - sneeze - me along on your little - sneeze - domestic - sneeze - errands!"
Of course, the Weasel shoved back. Rather hard too, considering Draco was currently suffering, and was thus not at one hundred percent. The idiot should really have had more sense.
"No," he bellowed, "you asked me to take you out somewhere for once, but I'd already promised Hermione I'd feed Crookshanks, and you just couldn't wait for me to come pick you up af--"
Ron's yelling came to a sputtering stop as Draco grabbed him by the hair at the back of his head and kissed him. Draco wrenched his lips away after a moment and smirked at Weasley's expression. He looked even more ridiculous than usual; anger and lust and a hint of confusion was a good look for him.
"Going out is overrated," Draco said, impressed with himself that he refrained from sneezing even once during the entire sentence.
"Yeah," Weasley said, oh-so-intelligently.
"Look," Draco said, trying desperately not to sneeze in Ron's face, as that would likely start another argument and he would really prefer to be in a bedroom when that happened, "feed the blasted animal, then meet me back at mine in five, yeah?"
"Sounds," Ron said, and cleared his throat. "Sounds good."
"Good," Draco pulled away. He managed to get fully clear before sneezing again. "Just. Just make sure you're clear of fur before you Apparate."
"I do know how to use a cleaning spell, you stinking ferret," Weasely said, his face darkening again.
"Prove it." And before he could reply, Draco turned on the spot and Disapparated, figuring five minutes was enough time to get Weasely's anger simmering nicely.
And sure enough, five minutes later on the dot, he was not disappointed.
::fin::