Two Months (Starting Over 'verse) by kargrif, Angel/Xander 7/7
I'm not sure what my day is going to be like tomorrow, so I"m going to go ahead and post this now.
This was originally titled 'Home' but after I finished it I decided on a name change.
Title: Two Months
Author: kargrif
Summary: Written for Dec. 07 beginning at buffy_and_then Angel’s been in LA for two months. A friend steps in to try and help.
Pairing(s)/Character(s): Xander & Angel
Season: AU Season 4
Rating: R (nothing graphic just because of the slash implied)
Warnings: m/m
Word count: 1,470
Disclaimer: Joss owns all.
Beta'd by: spikeslovebite, she’s my Yoda!
ETA: All parts of this 'verse that have been written so far can be found here
***
Angel sat in his new office staring at the wall. Angel Investigations was open for business.
It had been two months since he’d left Sunnydale-and Xander-behind, and he hadn’t stopped brooding since. If Xander were here, he’d have joked and teased him until his cheeks ached from smiling. If Xander were here, he would insist on ordering takeout from a long list of favorites and pestering Angel until he would finally eat a small portion just to appease the boy. If Xander were here-
He stopped his melancholy thoughts, the same thoughts he had been having since leaving for LA. He had called back to check on his friends dozens of times in the last couple of months. At first Buffy had been huffy and demanding, angry that he hadn’t checked with her before leaving and even more so for leaving Spike behind for them to deal with. Willow had been alternately apologetic over the ‘will be done’ spell, angry over him leaving without a goodbye, and sympathetic as to his reasons for going.
The few times he had talked to Giles, they avoided any mention of Willow’s spell and his sudden departure. Angel knew that Whistler had gone back to the group after his exit, explaining that the Powers That Be had decided to relocate the vampire where he would be able to do more good. It had all been for show. Angel knew that the tight-knit group already knew what had happened that night, had probably known every detail before the sun rose to start the new day.
Xander had yet to answer his phone.
Doyle and Cordelia had already left for the day. It was strange coming to LA to find a former Scooby waiting for him. Doyle and Whistler had apparently teamed up the month before he had arrived to save the aspiring actress from a rich vampire who loved the taste of starlets.
Angel was reluctant, at first, to allow Cordy to help, not wanting any more reminders of Xander than he already carried with him. Oh and it has nothing to do with remembering how many times you had to watch them try to suck each others face off during their brief romance, he told himself sarcastically. The girl had proved competent though in the last months and he could find no other reason to deny the extra help. And if he burned with jealousy every time he remembered how happy Xander looked in his tux with Cordelia on his arm at the Prom, then that was his own business.
Angel sighed, leaning back heavily in his chair.
A knock on the door finally broke through Angel’s moping. He staggered toward the door, noting from his stiffness that he must have been sitting much longer than he thought.
“May I help you?” he asked as he opened the door.
“I hope so,” the familiar voice replied.
Angel’s head jerked up in shock. “Xander.”
Shaggy brown curls bobbed wildly as he nodded. “That would be me.” He waited for a moment before asking quietly, “May I come in?”
“Oh! Yes, of course,” Angel said, shaking off his surprise and stepping aside to allow the other man to enter.
Xander stepped just inside the door, waiting for a cue from Angel.
“Sorry. Come into the…well, the other side of the office. The side with the chairs.” Angel grinned ruefully.
While Xander looked around the office, Angel stared his fill of his estranged friend. Xander’s clothes were a little more rumpled than usual and the flesh around his eyes seemed darker, as if he hadn’t been sleeping properly.
Angel cleared his throat. “So what brings you to LA?” he asked, holding his unneeded breath, wary of hoping for too much.
“Cordy called,” Xander said cryptically.
Angel felt a flash of jealousy before squashing it down. “Oh.”
Xander moved about the room, poking around the scattered files and newspaper clippings that Cordy had yet to file. “Yeah, we’ve been talking off and on the last few weeks.”
The thought of a reconciliation between Xander and Cordelia brought white hot flames through his stomach and he fought back the desire to curl up in a dark corner or storm out and find something to kill. “Oh. Cordy hadn’t mentioned talking to you. She, um, just left a bit ago to head home. She should be there by now.”
Xander nodded. “I know. She told me what time she normally heads home, barring emergencies.”
“Oh,” Angel said again. He was feeling like a broken record but he was too confused to know what else to say.
A small figurine toppled under Xander’s usual grace and Angel couldn’t help but smile. Some things would never change. That thought helped to bolster Angel’s spirits. This was still his friend, still Xander, despite the discomfort between them now.
“Cordy’s had quite a lot to say in our conversations actually. Lots of stuff about demons, evil vampires trying to snack on her, and not-so-evil vampires sitting in their offices staring off into space for hours and hours with a sour look on their face, otherwise known as brooding.” Xander paused expectantly.
Angel turned away. “I don’t brood…all the time,” he added defensively.
“So only ninety-nine percent of the time then?” Xander joked.
Angel cringed. “I may have brooded a little more than normal, but it’s been hard picking up and starting over.”
“And whose fault was that?” Xander huffed before stopping and taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.”
“No. You’re right. It was my fault, the whole thing. I chose to leave and-”
“Look, I didn’t come here to fight.”
“Then why did you come here?” Angel asked, refusing to look the other man in the eye.
Xander exhaled raggedly. He moved closer to the vampire, who was waiting sullenly for his answer. He spoke slowly and clearly, not wanting to have to repeat himself. “I came here because I missed my best friend. I came here because I think my best friend missed me. I also came here because my best friend kissed me, then he took off out of town before I could realize how much I enjoyed it…once I got over the shock, that is. I came here because I wanted to see if we could work things out, my friend and me.”
Angel didn’t move a muscle, afraid that if he tried to reach out and touch the man he had longed for so many years he would just be a dreamed up ghost of unrequited desire. “I-I…this can’t be-”
“It is. I’ve had a lot of time to think. Think, not brood, mind you, and I’ve discovered some things about myself that I never knew before.”
“Like?”
“Like the fact that I’ve been attracted to you since you came to Sunnydale. I didn’t realize it before, but I’ve had the luxury of spending two months analyzing every thought and feeling I’ve had over the last several years, especially the ones concerning you. I was drawn to you way more than just enthusiasm over having another guy around to diffuse the estrogen floating around. I would get genuinely excited when I knew I was going to see you. I would miss you when we were apart for more than a few days, but then that didn’t happen too often, did it? I thought of you when we were apart. I would find myself setting aside things to tell you later. I would see things and think, ‘I wonder if Angel would like that?’ I didn’t know that it wasn’t normal for guys to think that way. I hadn’t had a best guy friend since Jesse, and we had always been so close we were like brothers. Except brothers don’t think about each other like I think about you, like I think you think about me.”
“Xander-”
“Let me finish,” the Scooby interrupted. “So, this is me, asking you for a chance to take things slow. Very slow. Elmer Fudd slow, because this is all new to me and I need time to adjust. Not that I think adjusting to you would be a hardship…I mean, I hope it’ll be hard but not difficult, cause hard would be good….later on down the road, of course, ‘cause I’m not exactly ready for the I-wanna-sex-you-up part just yet, and please if I ever quote Color Me Badd again, just kill me right now-”
“Xander I-”
“Angel,” Xander cut him off once more.
“Yes?”
“Has anyone ever told you that you talk too much?” he asked.
Xander stepped so close that Angel could feel the waves of heat and caught a hint of long-gone aftershave between them. “Uh, no, but I just-”
“Angel, just shut up and kiss me.”
So he did.
***
Sorta The End.
I do plan to add to this 'verse as the muse strikes. If anyone has any certain episode/scene they'd like to see how it might have gone in this 'verse let me know and I'll see what the muse can do.
Thanks to everyone who read and/or commented on my first Angel/Xander fic! *hugs you all*
This was originally titled 'Home' but after I finished it I decided on a name change.
Title: Two Months
Author: kargrif
Summary: Written for Dec. 07 beginning at buffy_and_then Angel’s been in LA for two months. A friend steps in to try and help.
Pairing(s)/Character(s): Xander & Angel
Season: AU Season 4
Rating: R (nothing graphic just because of the slash implied)
Warnings: m/m
Word count: 1,470
Disclaimer: Joss owns all.
Beta'd by: spikeslovebite, she’s my Yoda!
ETA: All parts of this 'verse that have been written so far can be found here
***
Angel sat in his new office staring at the wall. Angel Investigations was open for business.
It had been two months since he’d left Sunnydale-and Xander-behind, and he hadn’t stopped brooding since. If Xander were here, he’d have joked and teased him until his cheeks ached from smiling. If Xander were here, he would insist on ordering takeout from a long list of favorites and pestering Angel until he would finally eat a small portion just to appease the boy. If Xander were here-
He stopped his melancholy thoughts, the same thoughts he had been having since leaving for LA. He had called back to check on his friends dozens of times in the last couple of months. At first Buffy had been huffy and demanding, angry that he hadn’t checked with her before leaving and even more so for leaving Spike behind for them to deal with. Willow had been alternately apologetic over the ‘will be done’ spell, angry over him leaving without a goodbye, and sympathetic as to his reasons for going.
The few times he had talked to Giles, they avoided any mention of Willow’s spell and his sudden departure. Angel knew that Whistler had gone back to the group after his exit, explaining that the Powers That Be had decided to relocate the vampire where he would be able to do more good. It had all been for show. Angel knew that the tight-knit group already knew what had happened that night, had probably known every detail before the sun rose to start the new day.
Xander had yet to answer his phone.
Doyle and Cordelia had already left for the day. It was strange coming to LA to find a former Scooby waiting for him. Doyle and Whistler had apparently teamed up the month before he had arrived to save the aspiring actress from a rich vampire who loved the taste of starlets.
Angel was reluctant, at first, to allow Cordy to help, not wanting any more reminders of Xander than he already carried with him. Oh and it has nothing to do with remembering how many times you had to watch them try to suck each others face off during their brief romance, he told himself sarcastically. The girl had proved competent though in the last months and he could find no other reason to deny the extra help. And if he burned with jealousy every time he remembered how happy Xander looked in his tux with Cordelia on his arm at the Prom, then that was his own business.
Angel sighed, leaning back heavily in his chair.
A knock on the door finally broke through Angel’s moping. He staggered toward the door, noting from his stiffness that he must have been sitting much longer than he thought.
“May I help you?” he asked as he opened the door.
“I hope so,” the familiar voice replied.
Angel’s head jerked up in shock. “Xander.”
Shaggy brown curls bobbed wildly as he nodded. “That would be me.” He waited for a moment before asking quietly, “May I come in?”
“Oh! Yes, of course,” Angel said, shaking off his surprise and stepping aside to allow the other man to enter.
Xander stepped just inside the door, waiting for a cue from Angel.
“Sorry. Come into the…well, the other side of the office. The side with the chairs.” Angel grinned ruefully.
While Xander looked around the office, Angel stared his fill of his estranged friend. Xander’s clothes were a little more rumpled than usual and the flesh around his eyes seemed darker, as if he hadn’t been sleeping properly.
Angel cleared his throat. “So what brings you to LA?” he asked, holding his unneeded breath, wary of hoping for too much.
“Cordy called,” Xander said cryptically.
Angel felt a flash of jealousy before squashing it down. “Oh.”
Xander moved about the room, poking around the scattered files and newspaper clippings that Cordy had yet to file. “Yeah, we’ve been talking off and on the last few weeks.”
The thought of a reconciliation between Xander and Cordelia brought white hot flames through his stomach and he fought back the desire to curl up in a dark corner or storm out and find something to kill. “Oh. Cordy hadn’t mentioned talking to you. She, um, just left a bit ago to head home. She should be there by now.”
Xander nodded. “I know. She told me what time she normally heads home, barring emergencies.”
“Oh,” Angel said again. He was feeling like a broken record but he was too confused to know what else to say.
A small figurine toppled under Xander’s usual grace and Angel couldn’t help but smile. Some things would never change. That thought helped to bolster Angel’s spirits. This was still his friend, still Xander, despite the discomfort between them now.
“Cordy’s had quite a lot to say in our conversations actually. Lots of stuff about demons, evil vampires trying to snack on her, and not-so-evil vampires sitting in their offices staring off into space for hours and hours with a sour look on their face, otherwise known as brooding.” Xander paused expectantly.
Angel turned away. “I don’t brood…all the time,” he added defensively.
“So only ninety-nine percent of the time then?” Xander joked.
Angel cringed. “I may have brooded a little more than normal, but it’s been hard picking up and starting over.”
“And whose fault was that?” Xander huffed before stopping and taking a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that.”
“No. You’re right. It was my fault, the whole thing. I chose to leave and-”
“Look, I didn’t come here to fight.”
“Then why did you come here?” Angel asked, refusing to look the other man in the eye.
Xander exhaled raggedly. He moved closer to the vampire, who was waiting sullenly for his answer. He spoke slowly and clearly, not wanting to have to repeat himself. “I came here because I missed my best friend. I came here because I think my best friend missed me. I also came here because my best friend kissed me, then he took off out of town before I could realize how much I enjoyed it…once I got over the shock, that is. I came here because I wanted to see if we could work things out, my friend and me.”
Angel didn’t move a muscle, afraid that if he tried to reach out and touch the man he had longed for so many years he would just be a dreamed up ghost of unrequited desire. “I-I…this can’t be-”
“It is. I’ve had a lot of time to think. Think, not brood, mind you, and I’ve discovered some things about myself that I never knew before.”
“Like?”
“Like the fact that I’ve been attracted to you since you came to Sunnydale. I didn’t realize it before, but I’ve had the luxury of spending two months analyzing every thought and feeling I’ve had over the last several years, especially the ones concerning you. I was drawn to you way more than just enthusiasm over having another guy around to diffuse the estrogen floating around. I would get genuinely excited when I knew I was going to see you. I would miss you when we were apart for more than a few days, but then that didn’t happen too often, did it? I thought of you when we were apart. I would find myself setting aside things to tell you later. I would see things and think, ‘I wonder if Angel would like that?’ I didn’t know that it wasn’t normal for guys to think that way. I hadn’t had a best guy friend since Jesse, and we had always been so close we were like brothers. Except brothers don’t think about each other like I think about you, like I think you think about me.”
“Xander-”
“Let me finish,” the Scooby interrupted. “So, this is me, asking you for a chance to take things slow. Very slow. Elmer Fudd slow, because this is all new to me and I need time to adjust. Not that I think adjusting to you would be a hardship…I mean, I hope it’ll be hard but not difficult, cause hard would be good….later on down the road, of course, ‘cause I’m not exactly ready for the I-wanna-sex-you-up part just yet, and please if I ever quote Color Me Badd again, just kill me right now-”
“Xander I-”
“Angel,” Xander cut him off once more.
“Yes?”
“Has anyone ever told you that you talk too much?” he asked.
Xander stepped so close that Angel could feel the waves of heat and caught a hint of long-gone aftershave between them. “Uh, no, but I just-”
“Angel, just shut up and kiss me.”
So he did.
***
Sorta The End.
I do plan to add to this 'verse as the muse strikes. If anyone has any certain episode/scene they'd like to see how it might have gone in this 'verse let me know and I'll see what the muse can do.
Thanks to everyone who read and/or commented on my first Angel/Xander fic! *hugs you all*