First, please accept my heart-felt sympathies. It's a wrenching & damaging experience to see somebody you care about transformed by drugs and/or alcohol. It's also very difficult to untangle the behavior from the person inside that you know and care about, particularly when it's right up in your face
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NA has made a significant difference in my life these last four months. Here's the number for the Buffalo Area: 716-878-2316. You are welcome to attend any open meeting (they'll be able to steer you towards al-anon and nar-anon meetings as well.)
I'm in treatment in rochester, but the rooms of NA are a safe place to approach recovery, wherever you are. Consider going to a meeting without him, if he isn't ready yet.
I've been dealing with this on and off for thirteen years. I have some clean time scattered throughout, but i've been addicted most of my adult life. I started out with the drugs your boyfriend did. Just because they are prescription drugs doesn't make them any safer. It all evolvs and all roads lead to the same place with drugs, anyway: jails, institutions, and death.
I give you credit for sticking by him. Everybody needs someone who believes in them.
40mg of adderall four times a week is hardly a problem. Shoot, my doctor gives me a script for that dose daily, though I rarely take that much and always take a few days off a week. The fact is, everyone gets benefits from stimulants in the same way you do, they help concentration, focus, give you energy. If he finds adderall beneficial, he should consider finding a doctor to prescribe it for him
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NA saved my best friend's life, as well as her husbands, and so many other people I've met. It's not a cult-- it's a program that gives people the tools they need to fight addiction. And even in NA they say the only cure is death-- an addict will always be an addict, it's just a matter of acting on the addiction or staying clean.
Someone confesses publically that their SO has been stealing their prescription meds and may have an addiction problem and you lecture that person about how she's overreacting? Classy.
And while some people have been drug users and successful - the list of drug users who have ended up incarcerated or dead is too long to write in an LJ comment.
You are NOT an idiot. My best friend was deep into drugs for a long time during our friendship and I never knew until she stopped trying to hide it. Addicts are the best actors-- and your ex is definitely an addict. My bestest has been in the NA program for nearly 5 years now and it's been working so well for her. If he could at least attend a meeting that'd be a step in the right direction.
You're very loving and great for trying to help him. the first thing he needs to do is to WANT to stop and change his life, otherwise it's not going to happen. It is very hard, but not impossible for him to stop.
You are FAR from an idiot. My best friend was a meth addict, and I literally told her I wanted her out of my life until she was ready to get clean..(she did thank goodness) this was the HARDEST thing I've ever had to do with our friendship... but things like that are complicated, and while we will always worry, we need to remember that we, as human beings, deserve better treatment than thatYour ex has to *WANT* to get better. Addicts of any drug (no matter how *safe* or *smart*) won't get better if A: they don't think they have a problem and B: They don't want the help. Sure, sometimes they'll go to appease us, but.. chances are.. that's not gonna work. They have to WANT recovery. (This is true with any addiction, really
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I'm in treatment in rochester, but the rooms of NA are a safe place to approach recovery, wherever you are. Consider going to a meeting without him, if he isn't ready yet.
I've been dealing with this on and off for thirteen years. I have some clean time scattered throughout, but i've been addicted most of my adult life. I started out with the drugs your boyfriend did. Just because they are prescription drugs doesn't make them any safer. It all evolvs and all roads lead to the same place with drugs, anyway: jails, institutions, and death.
I give you credit for sticking by him. Everybody needs someone who believes in them.
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And while some people have been drug users and successful - the list of drug users who have ended up incarcerated or dead is too long to write in an LJ comment.
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You're very loving and great for trying to help him. the first thing he needs to do is to WANT to stop and change his life, otherwise it's not going to happen. It is very hard, but not impossible for him to stop.
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This.
You are FAR from an idiot.
My best friend was a meth addict, and I literally told her I wanted her out of my life until she was ready to get clean..(she did thank goodness) this was the HARDEST thing I've ever had to do with our friendship... but things like that are complicated, and while we will always worry, we need to remember that we, as human beings, deserve better treatment than thatYour ex has to *WANT* to get better. Addicts of any drug (no matter how *safe* or *smart*) won't get better if A: they don't think they have a problem and B: They don't want the help. Sure, sometimes they'll go to appease us, but.. chances are.. that's not gonna work. They have to WANT recovery. (This is true with any addiction, really ( ... )
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