examination of self (moment of clarity)
Possibly my efforts to hold onto a relationship with an incredible person have been out of haste and misdirection. I feel that I would have been an overly stupid person if i hadn't at least attempted to hold onto this person. By putting forth these efforts I've done twice the damage as if I had just left it alone... these efforts may be misconstrued as contempt for this person but I honestly did not want to let go of "love" in my mind. In my misled efforts I'm coming to realize that my fears have come in the way of the happiness of a loved one and for that I apologize. I understand now that there is nothing i can do to help you through this time of pain except step aside and let your friends take over and maybe hope that someday i can be just as good a friend as they are.
things hardest to say must be real