life is a beautiful thing, death is something unspoken of

[buble727]

well as usaul for me i have been fucking up my life worst than ever. god i dont wont to even get into the details or anything. if you wont to know what i did ask me and i will tell you if i god damn feel like it. i hate myself. i fuck everything up no matter what it is or how important it is to me. i cant help it, thats just what i am.... a fuck up. i just want to let any body out there that i have ever hurt to i am sorry. that goes for kyle to, im sorry for what i did to you kyle. i am sory for not ever trying to call and make up with you. im sorry for everything. your in a better place now buddy. i just keep sitting here thinking, why now, why you, why not me. it wasnt your time and its bullshit. people wonder why i dont beleive in god, well here is another reason to add to the list. i am going to miss you kyle, your really have no idea. every song that comes on seems to remind me of you. i dream of memories of me you and brittney hanging out and well you know. those were the times i will never forget of you. or the time that you pulled josh out of the car when me and him were sitting in the driveway. i dont know what to do. i dont know how to deal with this. i have lost alot of people in my life but never a friend, never a kid. its scary to think how this shit can happen with no warning. no sign at all, it just happens.

well its off to bed for me cause my head hurts:(

oh yeah my bunny had babies so if you or anyone you know wants one give me a call cause i need to have homes lined up for these little guys:/