evahwood, friends and guys. hmmm...hahaha.
EVERWOOD
i'm not usually one to get addicted to shows, especially WB ones, but i have to say...ever since Everwood came out last year, i have been SO addicted to it. i just love the show. it's family friendly and deals with a lot of good issues...but i guess what i like the most about it is how it always seems to touch my heart in some way. i can't say the same about any episode of dawson's creek or friends or any of those shows. so there you have it. ER & Everwood, two of my favorite shows. hehe.
you should try watching it.
SOME MORE RANDOM THOUGHTS
i wonder a lot about the bigger things i've gone through in life. sometimes i still wonder why God put me through those things, or what i REALLY learned from them - if anything.
surely i have learned something, but then at times, i wonder if i'm smart enough to listen to myself about repeating mistakes. you know, i really have no idea what i'm talking about, but two things stick in mind. friends and ahem...guys. unfortunately. (can you believe i was pondering all this one the way home from running my sister's errands in katy?)
so anyway, yeah...while i was driving, i thought a lot about who my real friends were, or what i would define as a real friend. i'm sure we all have different definitions, but for me, i'm more a "feeling" kind of person. if i don't feel a certain way, i'm not going to force myself to. therefore, if i don't feel like someone is being a real friend, i'm not going to think of them like one. that doesn't mean they're NOT my friend. just...acquanitance, i guess.
and if you think about it, who really is your REAL friend? cuz honestly, i don't see many around me. i think i like to give myself the benefit of the doubt and think i have a lot of real friends, but when it all comes down to it, there's probably less than one hand. probably less than half a hand. haha.
and you know what? that's not sad. at least, i don't think so. i think there are really only a few people you're able to just share anything with and totally be yourself with. those are the people that you build lasting friendships with.
then you have those friends who aren't physically around you, but when you meet up with them again, perhaps once a year, it doesn't feel like they ever left. i like the friends that are like that. for me, those are the people that i grew up with. i think when you grow up together, you just kinda have a special bond that distance and time will never break. those are some blessed relationships :)
and then you have those friends that kinda tell you you're "outta sight, out of mind". and you know what? that's okay. i think i cared a lot when i first had to change environments, but now, ehh...i think i just got used to it. if they want to talk to me, they will make an effort to. it doesn't mean those people aren't my "friends", it doesn't mean i forgot them or vice versa...it just means distance got the better of us. which is fine. things like that happen. but those were good times too. and a side note here, i'm not categorizing anyone...i do cherish all my friendships with everyone...these are just my random thoughts (hence, the "random thoughts" title of this section).
and another side note: "knowing" about me and "knowing" me are two different things. same goes for all your friends. so which ones do you "know" about and which ones do you truly truly "KNOW"? some people know a lot of random tidbits about me...but it doesn't mean you really knwo me, does it? :) hehe.
SECOND PART OF SOME RANDOM THOUGHTS
now for the part that i'm still slowly trying to understand. hahaa. so i guess this would be what i was thinking about when i got to the Westheimer part of driving home.
guys. sigh. i wish God had just made ONE sex. don't you ever wish that? hahaa. i mean, it wouldn't be terrible because we'd never know life to be otherwise, know what i mean? haha. anyway, i dont' even know where to start.
i guess i was just thinking about my past relationships, past hurts, past crushes...all my pasts. and i really wonder..how much have i really learned? i mean, even if i really learned, am i really applying it to my life? i mean, i'd like to THINK i am, but am i REALLY??? hahaa.
i think girls have that problem about being too idealistic when it comes to crushes. but me? if you asked me right now about all that girly stuff "how would you like to be asked out?", "what kind of romantic things blah blah blahahhhhh"...i would totally be drawing a blank. if you'd asked me five years ago, yeah, i'd have an answer. but now? nothing. it's almost like i knocked myself conscious of reality. things like that don't really happen. do they?
whenever i hear about a friend who's bf has done something nice or romantic, i half want to say "aww...how sweet" and half want to gag in my nearby cup. why do girls always feel the need to compete and UP each other in the "my boyfriend is so sweet because..." category? yeah, i knwo you're thinking, "weren't you like that before?" and yes i was. but like i said earlier. that was then. this is now. it's been a few years already and boy, have i changed.
i dont' want to think i've become anti-dating, because i haven't. and i'm not anti-guys either (cuz trust me, i'm SO not.) BUT...i get so annoyed when i hear about girls who are just so desperate to get into relationships. or actually, i get so annoyed when i HEAR about relationships. haha. am i jealous? no. it just irks me that people become so idealistic when they're in a relationship. how they idealize their significant other, or assume that they will get married. cuz dude, if God don't want you to be married, you WON'T be.
you know what? i was just reading what i was writing, and you know what instantly came into my head? HOW DID I BECOME LIKE THIS?!?!?!?! hahaa. i almost can't believe how i somehow turned my romantic lovey-dovey idealistic self into a get-a-grip-on-reality-in-it's-ugliest-form. i mean, yeah, i still get those moments when i wonder, "oooh, what if? heehee." and those are just the few moments when i'm acting like a girl. but then the realistic part of me steps in and just shoots that down like the duck on Mario's Duck Hunt. BANG! BANG!! and then a dog (in the form of my own mind) comes over and picks up the dead birds and tells myself, "two points for being real!"
hmm. this is probably the longest i've ever written. will write more later i guess. i'm not done with this train of thought, so bear with me.. :) haha.
TWO OTHER RANDOM THOUGHTS:
i've decided one of the questions i'm going to ask Jesus when i get to the pearly gates. WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS STONEHENGE FOR?!?!? (i've been watching the travel channel a lot since my aunt got into the hospital, and they do a lot of series on stonehenge)
secondly, i think i'm going to get minor surgery on my arm. hooray. ask me for details if you want to know...
...if not, well then thanks for not caring. hahaha. just kidding :)
i'm not usually one to get addicted to shows, especially WB ones, but i have to say...ever since Everwood came out last year, i have been SO addicted to it. i just love the show. it's family friendly and deals with a lot of good issues...but i guess what i like the most about it is how it always seems to touch my heart in some way. i can't say the same about any episode of dawson's creek or friends or any of those shows. so there you have it. ER & Everwood, two of my favorite shows. hehe.
you should try watching it.
SOME MORE RANDOM THOUGHTS
i wonder a lot about the bigger things i've gone through in life. sometimes i still wonder why God put me through those things, or what i REALLY learned from them - if anything.
surely i have learned something, but then at times, i wonder if i'm smart enough to listen to myself about repeating mistakes. you know, i really have no idea what i'm talking about, but two things stick in mind. friends and ahem...guys. unfortunately. (can you believe i was pondering all this one the way home from running my sister's errands in katy?)
so anyway, yeah...while i was driving, i thought a lot about who my real friends were, or what i would define as a real friend. i'm sure we all have different definitions, but for me, i'm more a "feeling" kind of person. if i don't feel a certain way, i'm not going to force myself to. therefore, if i don't feel like someone is being a real friend, i'm not going to think of them like one. that doesn't mean they're NOT my friend. just...acquanitance, i guess.
and if you think about it, who really is your REAL friend? cuz honestly, i don't see many around me. i think i like to give myself the benefit of the doubt and think i have a lot of real friends, but when it all comes down to it, there's probably less than one hand. probably less than half a hand. haha.
and you know what? that's not sad. at least, i don't think so. i think there are really only a few people you're able to just share anything with and totally be yourself with. those are the people that you build lasting friendships with.
then you have those friends who aren't physically around you, but when you meet up with them again, perhaps once a year, it doesn't feel like they ever left. i like the friends that are like that. for me, those are the people that i grew up with. i think when you grow up together, you just kinda have a special bond that distance and time will never break. those are some blessed relationships :)
and then you have those friends that kinda tell you you're "outta sight, out of mind". and you know what? that's okay. i think i cared a lot when i first had to change environments, but now, ehh...i think i just got used to it. if they want to talk to me, they will make an effort to. it doesn't mean those people aren't my "friends", it doesn't mean i forgot them or vice versa...it just means distance got the better of us. which is fine. things like that happen. but those were good times too. and a side note here, i'm not categorizing anyone...i do cherish all my friendships with everyone...these are just my random thoughts (hence, the "random thoughts" title of this section).
and another side note: "knowing" about me and "knowing" me are two different things. same goes for all your friends. so which ones do you "know" about and which ones do you truly truly "KNOW"? some people know a lot of random tidbits about me...but it doesn't mean you really knwo me, does it? :) hehe.
SECOND PART OF SOME RANDOM THOUGHTS
now for the part that i'm still slowly trying to understand. hahaa. so i guess this would be what i was thinking about when i got to the Westheimer part of driving home.
guys. sigh. i wish God had just made ONE sex. don't you ever wish that? hahaa. i mean, it wouldn't be terrible because we'd never know life to be otherwise, know what i mean? haha. anyway, i dont' even know where to start.
i guess i was just thinking about my past relationships, past hurts, past crushes...all my pasts. and i really wonder..how much have i really learned? i mean, even if i really learned, am i really applying it to my life? i mean, i'd like to THINK i am, but am i REALLY??? hahaa.
i think girls have that problem about being too idealistic when it comes to crushes. but me? if you asked me right now about all that girly stuff "how would you like to be asked out?", "what kind of romantic things blah blah blahahhhhh"...i would totally be drawing a blank. if you'd asked me five years ago, yeah, i'd have an answer. but now? nothing. it's almost like i knocked myself conscious of reality. things like that don't really happen. do they?
whenever i hear about a friend who's bf has done something nice or romantic, i half want to say "aww...how sweet" and half want to gag in my nearby cup. why do girls always feel the need to compete and UP each other in the "my boyfriend is so sweet because..." category? yeah, i knwo you're thinking, "weren't you like that before?" and yes i was. but like i said earlier. that was then. this is now. it's been a few years already and boy, have i changed.
i dont' want to think i've become anti-dating, because i haven't. and i'm not anti-guys either (cuz trust me, i'm SO not.) BUT...i get so annoyed when i hear about girls who are just so desperate to get into relationships. or actually, i get so annoyed when i HEAR about relationships. haha. am i jealous? no. it just irks me that people become so idealistic when they're in a relationship. how they idealize their significant other, or assume that they will get married. cuz dude, if God don't want you to be married, you WON'T be.
you know what? i was just reading what i was writing, and you know what instantly came into my head? HOW DID I BECOME LIKE THIS?!?!?!?! hahaa. i almost can't believe how i somehow turned my romantic lovey-dovey idealistic self into a get-a-grip-on-reality-in-it's-ugliest-form. i mean, yeah, i still get those moments when i wonder, "oooh, what if? heehee." and those are just the few moments when i'm acting like a girl. but then the realistic part of me steps in and just shoots that down like the duck on Mario's Duck Hunt. BANG! BANG!! and then a dog (in the form of my own mind) comes over and picks up the dead birds and tells myself, "two points for being real!"
hmm. this is probably the longest i've ever written. will write more later i guess. i'm not done with this train of thought, so bear with me.. :) haha.
TWO OTHER RANDOM THOUGHTS:
i've decided one of the questions i'm going to ask Jesus when i get to the pearly gates. WHAT IN THE WORLD WAS STONEHENGE FOR?!?!? (i've been watching the travel channel a lot since my aunt got into the hospital, and they do a lot of series on stonehenge)
secondly, i think i'm going to get minor surgery on my arm. hooray. ask me for details if you want to know...
...if not, well then thanks for not caring. hahaha. just kidding :)