Logan Likes Mary Anne! Part The End!
Greetings, my dears! So, I should have had this snark up last night but it got too facking hot and I fell asleep in the middle of it. But today I got up bright and early and after Animal Crossing, I finished it up. I think this is my favorite book I've done so far. Not only is the plot not total ass but the BSC acts like normal human beings throughout it. It's actually kinda weird. I wish this had stayed consistent as the series went on. But obviously asking Ann not to write her characters as total nutty bitches was expecting too much. The series would 95% smaller if Ann didn't have them acting like prolapsed anuses. Well, let's go!
Part 1! Part 2!
-Song of the Day!-
Chapter 11!
Oh, God. A Thomas/Brewer sitting job. K Ron writes in the notebook that Karen wasn't scaring her siblings for a change so, they acknowledge that Karen is a little brat but they let her get away with it every time because...spunk? Oh, because when Karen's scaring them they're too frightened to fight. So what's worse? A kid fighting with their siblings which all kids do or a kid terrorizing their siblings which bullies do? I'm this close to writing a self-insert fanfiction where my proxy is like 'What the Hell? This kid is a brat! Sit down and shut up!' and then spend the rest of the sitting job playing with David M, Andrew and Emily while Karen sits in the corner. On fire.
Since Mary Anne is busy dating Logan, K Ron calls Dawn and asks her if she wants to stay the night. Mary Anne says Dawn is thrilled because she knows K Ron is jealous of her for stealing Mary Anne's love. Aww, this book has Louie in it. He's pretty worn out though and my heart breaks. I ignore the kiddie antics and focus on Dawn and K Ron talking about Mary Anne and Logan. K Ron is grossed out by the thought of them kissing and I relate to that. The sound of kissing is disgusting. She tells Dawn that she thinks Mary Anne is more serious about Logan than Claudia was about Trevor. She laments a bit about Mary Anne growing up faster than she is and Dawn says yeah, but they're still friends. K Ron insecure? Dawn comforting? Early books are weird. The chapter ends with them discussing the party and what to get Mary Anne and who to bring. Yawn.
Chapter 12!
Mary Anne has a day of phone calls and it's so weird to read about limiting your phone calls to ten minutes. First Logan calls Mary Anne to tell her they're gonna show 'Meatballs' and she should watch it. I check IMDB and it's not too raunchy but not exactly Disney. After they hang up, Stacey calls her asking if she's coming to the party and asked Logan to come. Mary Anne is like, no, not really and Stacey yells at her. She says she'll call them right now and hangs up. She makes her calls and get permission from her dad and Logan says he'll go with her. This chapter is boring.
Chapter 13!
The day of the party, Mary Anne stalls around her house before heading to Stacey's. When she gets there, she realizes she's the last one there and it makes her a little uncomfortable. Surely throwing her a surprise party is a good idea. In the McGill rec room, the boys and girls are separate with the boys doing boys things and the girls watching them. Logan comes up to her and they sit on a couch and talk. Mary Anne wonders if she's in love and no. No you aren't. You're 12. After they all have pizza, the lights go out. When they come back on, Stacey is carrying a cake that somehow doesn't put her in a coma. They all sing happy birthday to Mary Anne and she panics, running from the party and all the way home. I can't snark that. It sounds like Hell. Sorry if this chapter's short, it was pretty boring.
Chapter 14!
Mary Anne gets home and Richard asks her what she's doing home early. Mary Anne tells him the party was kinda a bust and broke up. Mary Anne goes to her room and throws herself on the bed to brood over what happened. She wonders how her friends could have done that to her. She thought they knew her better than that. I don't blame her any. They should have known that throwing her a surprise party was a bad idea. I was just talking to my bestie about how I'll probably be living with her by my next birthday and I only like small intimate birthdays. She was perfectly understanding about that because she knows how shy I am. So, this really is something her best friends should know. Their heart was in the right place but they done fucked up.
Mary Anne does think that they might think she overreacted but that they still should have known better. She thinks one of them will give her a call and opens her door a crack to be sure to hear the phone ring. Ten minutes pass and no one calls so she thinks maybe they'll come over. An hour later she hasn't heard from anyone and thinks that they're through with her. She thinks she ruined the party and everyone hates her now. Again, this is all very understandable. I'm sure we've all had moments where we thought 'Well, that's the end of it. My friends hate me and I'm gonna die alone.' And I do feel bad for her because she's not really at fault. She obviously has social anxiety and I relate to that. She decides since she no longer has any human friends, she'll ask her dad if she can have a cat.
The next morning Mary Anne goes downstairs where Richard is drinking coffee and reading some papers. Ooo! Don't tell Dawn he's doing something totally innocuous and not affecting anyone in anyway or she'll flip a shit and punish Mary Anne! She asks him about getting a cat and he's unsure about it. He asks what they'll do with it when they go on vacation and Mary Anne says maybe Mallory can feed him. And I dunno, I love that idea. I'd like to think Mal would get away from her horrible life for a few minutes and bond with a cat. “Good God, cat, you wouldn't believe the bullshit my family pulled today! First the triplets chipped one of my permanent teeth, then Margo walked too fast and puked in my rain boots, and then my mom made me re-shingle the roof!'
Richard thinks on it a moment then says, okay, they can get a cat. Mary Anne gives him a big hug and Richard earns even more of my love by insisting they get a shelter pet. Omg, I want to marry Richard! Which hey, ladies! We should play 'Marry, fuck, kill' with the 'brook dads. I'll go first-Marry-Richard, Kill-Patrick, Fuck...no one. Okay, so asexuals shouldn't play marry, fuck, kill. Anyhoo, Mary Anne is thrilled and goes to call Logan. When he answers he says he's surprised she's talking to him because he thought she was really pissed. Mary Anne clears up that she wasn't mad and he says they all should have known better. They make up and Mary Anne tells him about getting a cat. She asks if he wants to go with her to pick one out and he agrees. But first she and her dad go shopping for cat stuff. It just makes me think of the time I was just derping around in my room when my Gramma walks in and hands me a black kitten, just saying 'Here. I got this for you'. No time for pet supplies just kittened out of nowhere. That was Ickis. We got him stuff later of course.
And then eeeeeee! KITTENS! Mary Anne, Richard and Logan go to the animal shelter and ask to look at the kittens. They only have one litter of two red tabbies, a calico and a grey tabby. Mary Anne says she'd like the grey tabby and Logan asks her if she doesn't want to play with them a bit first. She says no, she always wanted a grey tabby to name Tigger which really doesn't make sense because Tigger is orange. Why not one of the red tabbies? This has bothered me for 30 years. They take Tigger home and he cries all the way because he's a baby and I love him. At home, Logan gives Mary Anne the present he'd gotten for her birthday and it's a sliver bracelet. He also got her a bracelet when he un-broke up with her, so he's not very creative. He also asks if she'd go to the Fifties Fling with him...another fucking dance.
Chapter 15!
After Logan goes home, Mary Anne calls Stacey to explain what happened. Stacey is understanding about it which really throws me off. I'm not used to the BSC not being unbelievable douche canoes. She also tells her about Tigger and Stacey suggests they have a special meeting the next day at Mary Anne's house to all meet him. So, on Sunday, the BSC comes over with her presents and a piece of her cake. They ate the cake? Well, I guess if they thought she'd never speak to any of them again it makes sense but it's still kinda bizarre.
Mary Anne opens her presents and she got some good stuff. Dawn got her a blue shirt to match her famous cities skirt, Stacey got her some socks that match the skirt, K Ron got her a music tape and Claudia made her some jewelry in pottery class. I look up pottery jewelry on etsy and don't see anything I'd personally wear. It does all look very 80s though so I'll give it a pass. Alan got her a wind up sparky dinosaur which is delightful and Austin Bently got her a pin in the shape of a cow which is also great. They eat the cake and I want to throw Dawn in an industrial mincer because she whines about wanting to brush her teeth. Here's a thought Dawn. If you're gonna bitch about eating cake, don't eat it in the first place. That fucking cake was wasted on your bony ass. Because you know her insufferable ass was making faces and groaning about 'Ew! This isn't dehydrated hamster bedding bricks with organic fish milk icing! Why am I eating this? I'm too special for white sugar! Did you notice? Did you notice how special I am?' I fucking hate Dawn.
At the club meeting Monday, they get swamped with calls and wonder what to do. They also get a call from one Mrs Morgan who has four boys and is never heard from again. And ho, shit! Guess who comes up with the idea to make Logan an associate member! Ah haha! Well, it ain't K Ron! It's Mary Anne! Who's the fucking idea machine now, bitch?! I'm gonna start pointing out all the times a BSC member besides K Ron gets an idea. And because K Ron is a pair of deformed rat testicles she only says that's 'not a bad idea'. Mary Anne calls up Logan and tells him about the idea. And really the only thing K Ron came up with was the name associate member. I'm fucking rollin' Logan agrees and says he knows a few other guys that might be interested in joining too which will never be mentioned again. And that's all! Man, this book is bizarre! I still like it though. So, next up for me will be 'Keep out, Claudia!' so we can see what Ann thinks racism is like. Because all white people are so good at writing that subject. As always thanks for reading!
Part 1! Part 2!
-Song of the Day!-
Chapter 11!
Oh, God. A Thomas/Brewer sitting job. K Ron writes in the notebook that Karen wasn't scaring her siblings for a change so, they acknowledge that Karen is a little brat but they let her get away with it every time because...spunk? Oh, because when Karen's scaring them they're too frightened to fight. So what's worse? A kid fighting with their siblings which all kids do or a kid terrorizing their siblings which bullies do? I'm this close to writing a self-insert fanfiction where my proxy is like 'What the Hell? This kid is a brat! Sit down and shut up!' and then spend the rest of the sitting job playing with David M, Andrew and Emily while Karen sits in the corner. On fire.
Since Mary Anne is busy dating Logan, K Ron calls Dawn and asks her if she wants to stay the night. Mary Anne says Dawn is thrilled because she knows K Ron is jealous of her for stealing Mary Anne's love. Aww, this book has Louie in it. He's pretty worn out though and my heart breaks. I ignore the kiddie antics and focus on Dawn and K Ron talking about Mary Anne and Logan. K Ron is grossed out by the thought of them kissing and I relate to that. The sound of kissing is disgusting. She tells Dawn that she thinks Mary Anne is more serious about Logan than Claudia was about Trevor. She laments a bit about Mary Anne growing up faster than she is and Dawn says yeah, but they're still friends. K Ron insecure? Dawn comforting? Early books are weird. The chapter ends with them discussing the party and what to get Mary Anne and who to bring. Yawn.
Chapter 12!
Mary Anne has a day of phone calls and it's so weird to read about limiting your phone calls to ten minutes. First Logan calls Mary Anne to tell her they're gonna show 'Meatballs' and she should watch it. I check IMDB and it's not too raunchy but not exactly Disney. After they hang up, Stacey calls her asking if she's coming to the party and asked Logan to come. Mary Anne is like, no, not really and Stacey yells at her. She says she'll call them right now and hangs up. She makes her calls and get permission from her dad and Logan says he'll go with her. This chapter is boring.
Chapter 13!
The day of the party, Mary Anne stalls around her house before heading to Stacey's. When she gets there, she realizes she's the last one there and it makes her a little uncomfortable. Surely throwing her a surprise party is a good idea. In the McGill rec room, the boys and girls are separate with the boys doing boys things and the girls watching them. Logan comes up to her and they sit on a couch and talk. Mary Anne wonders if she's in love and no. No you aren't. You're 12. After they all have pizza, the lights go out. When they come back on, Stacey is carrying a cake that somehow doesn't put her in a coma. They all sing happy birthday to Mary Anne and she panics, running from the party and all the way home. I can't snark that. It sounds like Hell. Sorry if this chapter's short, it was pretty boring.
Chapter 14!
Mary Anne gets home and Richard asks her what she's doing home early. Mary Anne tells him the party was kinda a bust and broke up. Mary Anne goes to her room and throws herself on the bed to brood over what happened. She wonders how her friends could have done that to her. She thought they knew her better than that. I don't blame her any. They should have known that throwing her a surprise party was a bad idea. I was just talking to my bestie about how I'll probably be living with her by my next birthday and I only like small intimate birthdays. She was perfectly understanding about that because she knows how shy I am. So, this really is something her best friends should know. Their heart was in the right place but they done fucked up.
Mary Anne does think that they might think she overreacted but that they still should have known better. She thinks one of them will give her a call and opens her door a crack to be sure to hear the phone ring. Ten minutes pass and no one calls so she thinks maybe they'll come over. An hour later she hasn't heard from anyone and thinks that they're through with her. She thinks she ruined the party and everyone hates her now. Again, this is all very understandable. I'm sure we've all had moments where we thought 'Well, that's the end of it. My friends hate me and I'm gonna die alone.' And I do feel bad for her because she's not really at fault. She obviously has social anxiety and I relate to that. She decides since she no longer has any human friends, she'll ask her dad if she can have a cat.
The next morning Mary Anne goes downstairs where Richard is drinking coffee and reading some papers. Ooo! Don't tell Dawn he's doing something totally innocuous and not affecting anyone in anyway or she'll flip a shit and punish Mary Anne! She asks him about getting a cat and he's unsure about it. He asks what they'll do with it when they go on vacation and Mary Anne says maybe Mallory can feed him. And I dunno, I love that idea. I'd like to think Mal would get away from her horrible life for a few minutes and bond with a cat. “Good God, cat, you wouldn't believe the bullshit my family pulled today! First the triplets chipped one of my permanent teeth, then Margo walked too fast and puked in my rain boots, and then my mom made me re-shingle the roof!'
Richard thinks on it a moment then says, okay, they can get a cat. Mary Anne gives him a big hug and Richard earns even more of my love by insisting they get a shelter pet. Omg, I want to marry Richard! Which hey, ladies! We should play 'Marry, fuck, kill' with the 'brook dads. I'll go first-Marry-Richard, Kill-Patrick, Fuck...no one. Okay, so asexuals shouldn't play marry, fuck, kill. Anyhoo, Mary Anne is thrilled and goes to call Logan. When he answers he says he's surprised she's talking to him because he thought she was really pissed. Mary Anne clears up that she wasn't mad and he says they all should have known better. They make up and Mary Anne tells him about getting a cat. She asks if he wants to go with her to pick one out and he agrees. But first she and her dad go shopping for cat stuff. It just makes me think of the time I was just derping around in my room when my Gramma walks in and hands me a black kitten, just saying 'Here. I got this for you'. No time for pet supplies just kittened out of nowhere. That was Ickis. We got him stuff later of course.
And then eeeeeee! KITTENS! Mary Anne, Richard and Logan go to the animal shelter and ask to look at the kittens. They only have one litter of two red tabbies, a calico and a grey tabby. Mary Anne says she'd like the grey tabby and Logan asks her if she doesn't want to play with them a bit first. She says no, she always wanted a grey tabby to name Tigger which really doesn't make sense because Tigger is orange. Why not one of the red tabbies? This has bothered me for 30 years. They take Tigger home and he cries all the way because he's a baby and I love him. At home, Logan gives Mary Anne the present he'd gotten for her birthday and it's a sliver bracelet. He also got her a bracelet when he un-broke up with her, so he's not very creative. He also asks if she'd go to the Fifties Fling with him...another fucking dance.
Chapter 15!
After Logan goes home, Mary Anne calls Stacey to explain what happened. Stacey is understanding about it which really throws me off. I'm not used to the BSC not being unbelievable douche canoes. She also tells her about Tigger and Stacey suggests they have a special meeting the next day at Mary Anne's house to all meet him. So, on Sunday, the BSC comes over with her presents and a piece of her cake. They ate the cake? Well, I guess if they thought she'd never speak to any of them again it makes sense but it's still kinda bizarre.
Mary Anne opens her presents and she got some good stuff. Dawn got her a blue shirt to match her famous cities skirt, Stacey got her some socks that match the skirt, K Ron got her a music tape and Claudia made her some jewelry in pottery class. I look up pottery jewelry on etsy and don't see anything I'd personally wear. It does all look very 80s though so I'll give it a pass. Alan got her a wind up sparky dinosaur which is delightful and Austin Bently got her a pin in the shape of a cow which is also great. They eat the cake and I want to throw Dawn in an industrial mincer because she whines about wanting to brush her teeth. Here's a thought Dawn. If you're gonna bitch about eating cake, don't eat it in the first place. That fucking cake was wasted on your bony ass. Because you know her insufferable ass was making faces and groaning about 'Ew! This isn't dehydrated hamster bedding bricks with organic fish milk icing! Why am I eating this? I'm too special for white sugar! Did you notice? Did you notice how special I am?' I fucking hate Dawn.
At the club meeting Monday, they get swamped with calls and wonder what to do. They also get a call from one Mrs Morgan who has four boys and is never heard from again. And ho, shit! Guess who comes up with the idea to make Logan an associate member! Ah haha! Well, it ain't K Ron! It's Mary Anne! Who's the fucking idea machine now, bitch?! I'm gonna start pointing out all the times a BSC member besides K Ron gets an idea. And because K Ron is a pair of deformed rat testicles she only says that's 'not a bad idea'. Mary Anne calls up Logan and tells him about the idea. And really the only thing K Ron came up with was the name associate member. I'm fucking rollin' Logan agrees and says he knows a few other guys that might be interested in joining too which will never be mentioned again. And that's all! Man, this book is bizarre! I still like it though. So, next up for me will be 'Keep out, Claudia!' so we can see what Ann thinks racism is like. Because all white people are so good at writing that subject. As always thanks for reading!