Baby-sitters on Board! Part 3!
Jeeze, guys. I'm totally sorry this is so late. I have no excuse. I was just being lazy. Plus my laptop went screwy and I lost all my bookmarks somehow. I don't know what happened but I'm pretty pissed. Tons of art inspo sites just gone. Someday I'll get a functioning laptop. Anyways, I got back into my snark and will ty not to be so lazy. Well, let's go!
Part 1! Part 2!
-Song of the Day!-
Chapter 11! Mary Anne!
So, the triplets got in trouble for running around the ship and knocking into people and see what happens when you let your ten year old brats run around unsupervised Ma and Pa?! And of course, they hand off the responsibility of their bratty kids to MA and Stacey. MA watches the triplets plus Nicky and DM and is Elizabeth paying for baby-sitting? Because if not, that's ye olde bullshit. They tell her about their 'treasure map' and that the stowaway may be involved too. My my, kids are idiots. Now I'm not saying I never had harebrained ideas when I was young, but gosh, these kids are dumb.
The boys run around the ship looking for clues and again, dumb! How would a pirate from the 17th century bury treasure on a modern cruise ship? It's really boring and for a change, MA shares my sentiment and gets bored watching them run around being loony. MA sighs and someone asks her what's the matter. It's Chesty and MA explains that she's bored of watching kids run around being loony. They start talking and MA, dying of morbid curiosity, asks her about her parents. Chesty tells her they were killed in a car accident and MA can't imagine how that feels. MA says well, she is half an orphan so she kinda gets it. And okay rant time.
Chesty is a horrible, HORRIBLE person. It's no secret that I'm an orphan myself. I lost my both parents at a young age. And while I didn't give two shits about my so-called 'dad', losing my mom devastated me. And the thing is, I know how it is to grow up in a one parent home. And yes, it does fuck with you. I was lucky enough to have two great father figures, but it's still not the same as knowing you have a real father that cares about you. The point I'm trying to make is that MA has grown up in a one parent home. Chesty on the other hand, spoiler alert, is lying and has both parents. And that is one seriously fucked up thing to lie about. I don't care how she feels over shadowed by her parents or whatever other shit she uses as an excuse. You don't go around playing at being an orphan when that's a fucking devastating thing to go through. So, fuck Chesty. Fuck her right in the ear.
Chapter 12! Stacey!
Stacey is watching Claire and Margo and takes them swimming and shopping then to the arcade. On their way there, they run into Marc. Marc wants to go to the arcade too but his dad is a huge asshole who won't take him because those places give him a headache. What a shit head! Your little boy has a heart condition and you can't take a half hour of noise?! You dropped thousands of dollars on this trip but you draw the line at taking him into an arcade?! Damn! You got ice in your veins, Mr. Kubacki! What a shitty dad! Anyway, the problem is solved by a BSC member saying 'What's one more kid?' and taking him along.
After the arcade, they still have some time to kill, so Stacey treats them to some ice cream. Claudia is there at the parlour too and while Stacey is paying the guy in front of her whispers he'll pay for 'her' sundae too. Stacey looks back to see who he's talking about and sees an older lady and another teen girl but decides neither of them 'look like they deserve' a secret admirer. Jesus Jones! What a cunt! I swear Ann is like the most judgmental hag there is. Rather than doing anything helpful like see what this guy looks like, she just tries to flag down Claudia to alert her to her stalker. She pays and runs back to tell Claudia about her stalker and Claudia runs off. Okay here's something that bugged me even at age 8. Stacey just paid for the kids treats so I would conclude that you pay for your stuff right when you get it. Claudia has been there a while eating her sundae. How was her stalker able to pay for it when she should have already done so? Again, not only are secret admirer plots creepy but they're generally riddled with plot holes like this. And if an 8 year old picked this up, why the Hell couldn't a paid editor?
Chapter 13! Claudia!
Claudia goes running out looking for her stalker. She runs down the hall and almost smacks into a guy stepping out from behind a pillar. She asks him if he saw a guy coming that way. He says he did and that he had 'great sneakers'. They get to talking and he, Timothy, drops big hints about how he is indeed the one stalking her. But this is Claudia. What does she know about big fucking flashing signs? Also she thinks LA is exotic.
Timothy is from Darien which he says isn't far from Stoneybrook which makes Claud say she's horrible at geography. What? How horrible are you at geography that you don't even know the name of nearby cities? Does she never watch the news? It's right there in the weather. He says it's like they're destined to meet again because their high schools might go against each other in football. And Claudia thinks that's beautiful. It's not exactly 'A is for Amy who fell down the stairs B is for Basil assaulted by bears', but whatever. She also says she's always falling for poets but only names Trevor. Timothy asks her if she wants to go with him to Disney World the next day and she agrees.
Chapter 14! Kristy!
When they get to their hotel, Claudia tells K. Ron and Dawn she's tired of their shit and they're gonna call a truce or she's gonna have to cut a bitch. Of course, since K. Ron is a huge asshole, she dumps a bag of chips on a table and drops the bag on the floor. What a disgusting brat! Who eats off the Goddamn table?! And since when is Little Miss Gestapo such a slob?! This is the same bitch who pitched a fit because she didn't have a watch?! I seriously don't know what K. Ron I hate more. They both suck noodles. Thankfully, Claudia is there to smack that bitch up and tells her to stop being a petty little brat.
K. Ron makes up with Dawn by saying she was being messier than usual. Dawn says she was being cleaner than usual but was she really? I wouldn't call picking literal trash up off the floor being super neat. I would call it not being a total messy pain in the ass brat. Not that Dawn is totally off the hook. Because her shitty self won't remember this when Sharon marries Richard and she acts exactly like K. Ron. In fact, she's worse, because Richard was doing nothing to instigate a fight with her. So again, Dawn still manages to be the absolute worst person in the multiverse.
After they make up, they go to explore the hotel (Watson makes them take the kids, of course) and they see Rudy checking out. Wow! What are the chances?! Of all the fucking hotels in Orlando, Rudy just happens to be staying in the same one as K. Ron and just happens to be checking out right when she's in the lobby?! No wonder these bitches won the lotto! K. Ron over to antagonise Rudy into staying and God! Leave that poor old man alone! But because he can't just hit her in the face with his cane and tell her to fuck off, Rudy agrees to stay. Then after dinner, K. Ron berates the BSC some more about gift ideas while coming up with nothing herself. Great.
Chapter 15! Nope!
Nope! I'm not covering Karen being a lying little brat some more and getting absolutely no punishment from her weak ass dad. Instead, I'll post what I think Karen would look like if anyone did ever dare to punish her.
-But Minnie is MY best friend! I want everyone to sing to ME!-
Part 1! Part 2!
-Song of the Day!-
Chapter 11! Mary Anne!
So, the triplets got in trouble for running around the ship and knocking into people and see what happens when you let your ten year old brats run around unsupervised Ma and Pa?! And of course, they hand off the responsibility of their bratty kids to MA and Stacey. MA watches the triplets plus Nicky and DM and is Elizabeth paying for baby-sitting? Because if not, that's ye olde bullshit. They tell her about their 'treasure map' and that the stowaway may be involved too. My my, kids are idiots. Now I'm not saying I never had harebrained ideas when I was young, but gosh, these kids are dumb.
The boys run around the ship looking for clues and again, dumb! How would a pirate from the 17th century bury treasure on a modern cruise ship? It's really boring and for a change, MA shares my sentiment and gets bored watching them run around being loony. MA sighs and someone asks her what's the matter. It's Chesty and MA explains that she's bored of watching kids run around being loony. They start talking and MA, dying of morbid curiosity, asks her about her parents. Chesty tells her they were killed in a car accident and MA can't imagine how that feels. MA says well, she is half an orphan so she kinda gets it. And okay rant time.
Chesty is a horrible, HORRIBLE person. It's no secret that I'm an orphan myself. I lost my both parents at a young age. And while I didn't give two shits about my so-called 'dad', losing my mom devastated me. And the thing is, I know how it is to grow up in a one parent home. And yes, it does fuck with you. I was lucky enough to have two great father figures, but it's still not the same as knowing you have a real father that cares about you. The point I'm trying to make is that MA has grown up in a one parent home. Chesty on the other hand, spoiler alert, is lying and has both parents. And that is one seriously fucked up thing to lie about. I don't care how she feels over shadowed by her parents or whatever other shit she uses as an excuse. You don't go around playing at being an orphan when that's a fucking devastating thing to go through. So, fuck Chesty. Fuck her right in the ear.
Chapter 12! Stacey!
Stacey is watching Claire and Margo and takes them swimming and shopping then to the arcade. On their way there, they run into Marc. Marc wants to go to the arcade too but his dad is a huge asshole who won't take him because those places give him a headache. What a shit head! Your little boy has a heart condition and you can't take a half hour of noise?! You dropped thousands of dollars on this trip but you draw the line at taking him into an arcade?! Damn! You got ice in your veins, Mr. Kubacki! What a shitty dad! Anyway, the problem is solved by a BSC member saying 'What's one more kid?' and taking him along.
After the arcade, they still have some time to kill, so Stacey treats them to some ice cream. Claudia is there at the parlour too and while Stacey is paying the guy in front of her whispers he'll pay for 'her' sundae too. Stacey looks back to see who he's talking about and sees an older lady and another teen girl but decides neither of them 'look like they deserve' a secret admirer. Jesus Jones! What a cunt! I swear Ann is like the most judgmental hag there is. Rather than doing anything helpful like see what this guy looks like, she just tries to flag down Claudia to alert her to her stalker. She pays and runs back to tell Claudia about her stalker and Claudia runs off. Okay here's something that bugged me even at age 8. Stacey just paid for the kids treats so I would conclude that you pay for your stuff right when you get it. Claudia has been there a while eating her sundae. How was her stalker able to pay for it when she should have already done so? Again, not only are secret admirer plots creepy but they're generally riddled with plot holes like this. And if an 8 year old picked this up, why the Hell couldn't a paid editor?
Chapter 13! Claudia!
Claudia goes running out looking for her stalker. She runs down the hall and almost smacks into a guy stepping out from behind a pillar. She asks him if he saw a guy coming that way. He says he did and that he had 'great sneakers'. They get to talking and he, Timothy, drops big hints about how he is indeed the one stalking her. But this is Claudia. What does she know about big fucking flashing signs? Also she thinks LA is exotic.
Timothy is from Darien which he says isn't far from Stoneybrook which makes Claud say she's horrible at geography. What? How horrible are you at geography that you don't even know the name of nearby cities? Does she never watch the news? It's right there in the weather. He says it's like they're destined to meet again because their high schools might go against each other in football. And Claudia thinks that's beautiful. It's not exactly 'A is for Amy who fell down the stairs B is for Basil assaulted by bears', but whatever. She also says she's always falling for poets but only names Trevor. Timothy asks her if she wants to go with him to Disney World the next day and she agrees.
Chapter 14! Kristy!
When they get to their hotel, Claudia tells K. Ron and Dawn she's tired of their shit and they're gonna call a truce or she's gonna have to cut a bitch. Of course, since K. Ron is a huge asshole, she dumps a bag of chips on a table and drops the bag on the floor. What a disgusting brat! Who eats off the Goddamn table?! And since when is Little Miss Gestapo such a slob?! This is the same bitch who pitched a fit because she didn't have a watch?! I seriously don't know what K. Ron I hate more. They both suck noodles. Thankfully, Claudia is there to smack that bitch up and tells her to stop being a petty little brat.
K. Ron makes up with Dawn by saying she was being messier than usual. Dawn says she was being cleaner than usual but was she really? I wouldn't call picking literal trash up off the floor being super neat. I would call it not being a total messy pain in the ass brat. Not that Dawn is totally off the hook. Because her shitty self won't remember this when Sharon marries Richard and she acts exactly like K. Ron. In fact, she's worse, because Richard was doing nothing to instigate a fight with her. So again, Dawn still manages to be the absolute worst person in the multiverse.
After they make up, they go to explore the hotel (Watson makes them take the kids, of course) and they see Rudy checking out. Wow! What are the chances?! Of all the fucking hotels in Orlando, Rudy just happens to be staying in the same one as K. Ron and just happens to be checking out right when she's in the lobby?! No wonder these bitches won the lotto! K. Ron over to antagonise Rudy into staying and God! Leave that poor old man alone! But because he can't just hit her in the face with his cane and tell her to fuck off, Rudy agrees to stay. Then after dinner, K. Ron berates the BSC some more about gift ideas while coming up with nothing herself. Great.
Chapter 15! Nope!
Nope! I'm not covering Karen being a lying little brat some more and getting absolutely no punishment from her weak ass dad. Instead, I'll post what I think Karen would look like if anyone did ever dare to punish her.
-But Minnie is MY best friend! I want everyone to sing to ME!-