Jessi and the Bad Baby-sitter! Part The End!
Sorry for the lateness, ladies, but someone was feeling sick. I'm working on regulating my metabolism by eating three meals a day and holy shit! That's hard! I'm not used to so much food. So I've been laying around listening to creepypastas. I kept listening to the 'Lost Cosmonauts' recording and scaring myself. Anyway, I was taking a closer look at this book and surprise, surprise. It's by Suzanne Weyn. I am convinced she hates the BSC because there's always major bitch-itude in her books. But at least they're always plenty snark worthy. Well, let's go!
Part 1! Part 2!
-Song of the Day-
Chapter 11!
Mal doesn't come to school so Jessi goes to visit her afterwards. Mal is still feeling tired but also relieved that she has doctor's order to rest. I bet Kristy's pissed and investing in some matches and gasoline. They talk about the lamest play ever and Mal says maybe it'll make Dawn homesick and she'll come back. And in a total line of bullshit, Jessi waxes lyrical about how Dawn was so passionate about the things she believes in and how if she were there, she'd go to her about the whole Margo thieving sub-plot. Two points here. When the fuck did Dawn become Jessi's go-to for problems? Are you seriously telling me that she would go to Dawn and not Mal? I mean, I get it. I get that the ghostie wanted to make Dawn seem vital so they're pulling shit out their ass but Jesus. We're not stupid.
Also, Dawn was 'passionate' about what she believed in? Is that what you call being the whiniest, shrillest, most irritating, screeching, harpy butt belch of a baby in the entire series? This nutty bitch bitched about meat at a burger place. She constructed a menu fort like a fucking four year old worrying about cooties. She screamed at people for not recycling when there were no recycling bins in sight. She purposely upset her step-father because she was mad at his daughter. She spends so much time kissing her own ass she uses a suppository as lipstick. She wasn't 'passionate'. She was a fucking pain in the ass bitch.
Anyway, after that crapfest, Jessi asks Mal if Margo has said anything to their parents about stealing. Mal of course is like 'Wtf?! NO!' They go to Margo's room and confront her about it. Mal says she has to tell their parents and she and Jessi will go along for emotional support. She confesses to Dee and she says she'll take Margo to the store to return the loot. In a surprising turn, Dee says Mal has to stay home because she's sick. Now, it could be that she wants Mal to rest but let's be realistic. She probably wants her to watch the rest of the chimp house. Oh, she did ask Stacey to come watch them. Blah blah blah. That sub-plot is neatly wrapped up.
Chapter 12!
Nope. Not gonna cover the lamest play ever. Kiddie antics abound! Who cares?! Not road_baby! Have this instead!
Chapter 13!
Hell's bells! Wtf is this?! Torture road_baby day?! If I'm not gonna cover a 'Brook sitting job, I sure as Hell won't cover a California one with Mega-Bitch 5000. I instead offer an actual cute kid.
Chapter 14!
At a club meeting, Jessi is watching the door, willing Wendy to make it in time. She does make it, but she's not pleased because she was playing Mario Bros. with her friends and was 'winning'. I don't know how exactly you win against anyone on a one-player game but whatever. At least it's a recent game and not like, stick and hoop. K. Ron calls the meeting to order and brings up that her Chief Boot Lick Supreme ratted out Wendy on being late to the Pike job. Wendy says this club is ye olde bullshit and she's quitting. Kristy, that crusty butthole, says that Wendy knew what she was getting into and Wendy is like, 'Shut the fuck up. You didn't tell me shit about all your stupid rules when you hired me so don't get all shirty with me. I also don't need some jumped up Mudblood brat two years my senior bossing me around. Later, bitches.'
Once she's gone, K. Ron has to complain about her because Jesus Christ! She pointed out that K. Ron is a totally unbendable tyrant with the stupidest rules that she'll terrorise you into obeying. Jessi laments that Kristy is a leader and Wendy is a loner. How the fuck does that work out? If she was a loner she wouldn't have joined the club in the first place. And about K. Ron's leadership cred? Yeah, I'll just leave this here-
Shannon comes over and oh, hooray! She's suddenly freed up and can take Dawn's pointless title. One moment, please. I need a small break because I'll tear my laptop to shreds with my bare hands if I go into this rant unprepared. Just look at this idiot while I gather my thoughts.
Okay. Just what the Hell is wrong with Kristy? Does she really need to have someone fill the role of alternate officer that she can't function if there isn't one? Is it really such a vital position that they can't run the club without one? Dawn doesn't do shit. The only time I can recall her actually having to fill in for anyone is when Claudia was running around with Ashley. Kristy has the whole BSC so whipped that why would they need someone to fill in for them when she has them straight up terrified at missing a meeting? How come when Wendy said she doesn't like having to free her schedule to attend meetings, did no one suggest the position of associate? If they're calling their associates at every meeting because they're so busy, wouldn't it make sense to get more associates? But no, the great 'Idea Machine' can't come up with that. Because she sucks and everyone hates her. Shannon filling in for Dawn does not solve the problem of not having enough people to cover all the jobs that are coming in. They're still down a member. My God. Everyone associated with this book is a total idiot.
After the meeting, Jessi is walking home and a'sipping on some Kool-Aid because she's wondering if Wendy is even worth knowing. Because she told Kristy the truth. Because how very dare she question the rules of K. Ron the Everlasting. For that she must be shunned. Wendy, you're so much better off not being a member. You'll never be roped into a single carnival/talent show/std awareness festival. But Jessi calls Wendy and asks if they're still friends. Wendy is good people and says they are. So, will we ever see her again? Of course not, silly! She dared to defy the All-Powerful K. Ron and will be thrown in the bottomless pit just outside town.
Chapter 15!
A totally useless chapter. The BSC is out rollerskating and even Mallory dragged her ass there. We also finally get some outfits. 'Claudia wore hot pink stirrup pants and a fuzzy pink sweater that made a nice contrast with her neon green pads and helmet. Stacey looked cool as ever in jeans and a short brown leather jacket. Her helmet was black with silver streaks.' I keep meaning to bring this up and kept forgetting, but I want to know Dawn's stance on leather. I know she doesn't eat red meat because she doesn't like the taste and not eating it gives her the ego to think she shits glittery rainbows. I seem to remember that there were other times that someone wore leather, but it never said anything about what she thought.
The rest of the chapter is a big 'Who the Hell cares' so, I'm out. Next up will be California Girls because as an actual California girl that book pisses me off. There will be hate. As always, thanks for reading!
Part 1! Part 2!
-Song of the Day-
Chapter 11!
Mal doesn't come to school so Jessi goes to visit her afterwards. Mal is still feeling tired but also relieved that she has doctor's order to rest. I bet Kristy's pissed and investing in some matches and gasoline. They talk about the lamest play ever and Mal says maybe it'll make Dawn homesick and she'll come back. And in a total line of bullshit, Jessi waxes lyrical about how Dawn was so passionate about the things she believes in and how if she were there, she'd go to her about the whole Margo thieving sub-plot. Two points here. When the fuck did Dawn become Jessi's go-to for problems? Are you seriously telling me that she would go to Dawn and not Mal? I mean, I get it. I get that the ghostie wanted to make Dawn seem vital so they're pulling shit out their ass but Jesus. We're not stupid.
Also, Dawn was 'passionate' about what she believed in? Is that what you call being the whiniest, shrillest, most irritating, screeching, harpy butt belch of a baby in the entire series? This nutty bitch bitched about meat at a burger place. She constructed a menu fort like a fucking four year old worrying about cooties. She screamed at people for not recycling when there were no recycling bins in sight. She purposely upset her step-father because she was mad at his daughter. She spends so much time kissing her own ass she uses a suppository as lipstick. She wasn't 'passionate'. She was a fucking pain in the ass bitch.
Anyway, after that crapfest, Jessi asks Mal if Margo has said anything to their parents about stealing. Mal of course is like 'Wtf?! NO!' They go to Margo's room and confront her about it. Mal says she has to tell their parents and she and Jessi will go along for emotional support. She confesses to Dee and she says she'll take Margo to the store to return the loot. In a surprising turn, Dee says Mal has to stay home because she's sick. Now, it could be that she wants Mal to rest but let's be realistic. She probably wants her to watch the rest of the chimp house. Oh, she did ask Stacey to come watch them. Blah blah blah. That sub-plot is neatly wrapped up.
Chapter 12!
Nope. Not gonna cover the lamest play ever. Kiddie antics abound! Who cares?! Not road_baby! Have this instead!
Chapter 13!
Hell's bells! Wtf is this?! Torture road_baby day?! If I'm not gonna cover a 'Brook sitting job, I sure as Hell won't cover a California one with Mega-Bitch 5000. I instead offer an actual cute kid.
Chapter 14!
At a club meeting, Jessi is watching the door, willing Wendy to make it in time. She does make it, but she's not pleased because she was playing Mario Bros. with her friends and was 'winning'. I don't know how exactly you win against anyone on a one-player game but whatever. At least it's a recent game and not like, stick and hoop. K. Ron calls the meeting to order and brings up that her Chief Boot Lick Supreme ratted out Wendy on being late to the Pike job. Wendy says this club is ye olde bullshit and she's quitting. Kristy, that crusty butthole, says that Wendy knew what she was getting into and Wendy is like, 'Shut the fuck up. You didn't tell me shit about all your stupid rules when you hired me so don't get all shirty with me. I also don't need some jumped up Mudblood brat two years my senior bossing me around. Later, bitches.'
Once she's gone, K. Ron has to complain about her because Jesus Christ! She pointed out that K. Ron is a totally unbendable tyrant with the stupidest rules that she'll terrorise you into obeying. Jessi laments that Kristy is a leader and Wendy is a loner. How the fuck does that work out? If she was a loner she wouldn't have joined the club in the first place. And about K. Ron's leadership cred? Yeah, I'll just leave this here-
Shannon comes over and oh, hooray! She's suddenly freed up and can take Dawn's pointless title. One moment, please. I need a small break because I'll tear my laptop to shreds with my bare hands if I go into this rant unprepared. Just look at this idiot while I gather my thoughts.
Okay. Just what the Hell is wrong with Kristy? Does she really need to have someone fill the role of alternate officer that she can't function if there isn't one? Is it really such a vital position that they can't run the club without one? Dawn doesn't do shit. The only time I can recall her actually having to fill in for anyone is when Claudia was running around with Ashley. Kristy has the whole BSC so whipped that why would they need someone to fill in for them when she has them straight up terrified at missing a meeting? How come when Wendy said she doesn't like having to free her schedule to attend meetings, did no one suggest the position of associate? If they're calling their associates at every meeting because they're so busy, wouldn't it make sense to get more associates? But no, the great 'Idea Machine' can't come up with that. Because she sucks and everyone hates her. Shannon filling in for Dawn does not solve the problem of not having enough people to cover all the jobs that are coming in. They're still down a member. My God. Everyone associated with this book is a total idiot.
After the meeting, Jessi is walking home and a'sipping on some Kool-Aid because she's wondering if Wendy is even worth knowing. Because she told Kristy the truth. Because how very dare she question the rules of K. Ron the Everlasting. For that she must be shunned. Wendy, you're so much better off not being a member. You'll never be roped into a single carnival/talent show/std awareness festival. But Jessi calls Wendy and asks if they're still friends. Wendy is good people and says they are. So, will we ever see her again? Of course not, silly! She dared to defy the All-Powerful K. Ron and will be thrown in the bottomless pit just outside town.
Chapter 15!
A totally useless chapter. The BSC is out rollerskating and even Mallory dragged her ass there. We also finally get some outfits. 'Claudia wore hot pink stirrup pants and a fuzzy pink sweater that made a nice contrast with her neon green pads and helmet. Stacey looked cool as ever in jeans and a short brown leather jacket. Her helmet was black with silver streaks.' I keep meaning to bring this up and kept forgetting, but I want to know Dawn's stance on leather. I know she doesn't eat red meat because she doesn't like the taste and not eating it gives her the ego to think she shits glittery rainbows. I seem to remember that there were other times that someone wore leather, but it never said anything about what she thought.
The rest of the chapter is a big 'Who the Hell cares' so, I'm out. Next up will be California Girls because as an actual California girl that book pisses me off. There will be hate. As always, thanks for reading!